Help for non-athletic kid

[Anonymous]

DD is non-competitive, non-athletic and not interested in sports. This is only an issue b/c she absolutely hates PE in school and is not developing healthy habits in regards to her activity level. She's content staying home reading or engaging in imaginative play. She's really creative and a great kid, but she's hard to get interested in anything active. Some of her reluctance is she just likes other things more, but lately we've noticed she makes comments about not liking things because she's not good at them and she is more adamant about not joining activiites. How do we help her build confidence and feel more comfortable engaging in active/sports type activities. (We've tried swimming, soccer, ice skating, track, basketball and dance with various degrees of success in the past, currently the only thing she somewhat enjoys is dance) .

Looking for confidence building and skill building ideas as well as ways to help her see the positive sides of activity/exercise. Wanting to help develop lifelong healthy habits, not becoming a super star athlete.

[Anonymous]

We make our kids pick a sport each season. They don't have the option to opt out of physical activity.

[Anonymous]

Martial arts?

[Anonymous]

Yoga?

[Anonymous]

How old? I take my child who is a little like this to adult, regular yoga with me (she’s 8). I also try to follow the one sport per season (or it’s really 2 per year)-rec level, nothing serious.

[Anonymous]

This is my 9 yr old DS exactly. I've taken the focus completely off of sports and put it onto activity being needed just to be healthy. He likes Rollerblading recently. And I'll often say he needs to go for a walk before watching a show, or that he needs to run as fast as he can from one side of the backyard to the next 4 times. I've found that it needs to be more about fitting in bits of activity rather that a focused sport for him. He'll also do the treadmill at the gym with me (esp the ones with the tv

[Anonymous]

OP Here- DD is 9 years old.
We have done the pick one sport or activity a season, but it's been pulling teeth and is not instilling a habit of physical fitness, but rather reinforcing the dislike for the sport and feeling that she is not good at something. We are maintaining a dance class, but one hour a week is not enough.

I do "force" small bits of exercise - walking the dog, doing a dance video, doing yoga with me and appreciate the other ideas suggested.

We are really looking for ways to increase her confidence so that maybe she'll enjoy activity more. If she struggled in reading like she struggles with PE, we'd get her extra help... not sure how to do that with physical activity. (Her first quarter report card was great, but PE had a comment that she struggled with basic skills).

Thanks for all the suggestions, keep them coming.

[Anonymous]

How old is she?

When I was young I got chunky around 9 years old. My parents did not force sports or activity and to this day say that I refused and I resent it. Parents are supposed to facilitate experiences for their kids who don't know better. We make our son play an instrument and "do an activity" which in his case is always a sport, but telling your daughter it's important to be active and she has to choose something is important. Just make sure you model this and do it, too.

It could be a new sport each season, ping pong, or scheduled walks with you 5x/week around a middle school track. Just get it ingrained that people need to move.

I wish my parents had done this - I did not learn to college but my body image was forever tainted and I developed an eating disorder because I didn't have a healthy way to control my weight.

[Anonymous]

i play tennis with my non-athletic son. it's actually a fun activity/sport even both players are non-athletc. we hit against the wall (like raquet ball) to start then when he got some control of the shots we moved on to the court. it's doable.

[Anonymous]

OP, I had this problem briefly with my 7 yo. What helped us was not finding the right sport, but rather a right coach/place to do the sport. I signed him up for soccer where there were parent volunteer coaches, team spirit was a big part of it, and they had real games as he called them, and the uniform, etc etc.
If your daughter enjoys dance, try finding a dance studio which offers more than one class a week, has cute costumes for the kids, puts on performances, etc etc. Some kids just need more to a sport than the boring routine.

[Anonymous]

Build off of what she enjoys. There are so many different types of dance...

[Anonymous]

Have you had her motor skills tested? She may actually struggle with coordination, balance or core strength. Forcing her into activities without understanding what is going on could backfire and further undermine her confidence. If you test you may get an idea of what her strengths and weaknesses are, and OT or PT may help. Swimming, martial arts and track and field are often good athletic activities for kids who may struggle with group sports.

[Anonymous]

Girls on the run?

[Anonymous]

If she likes dance, go with it. Also - what about learning a new sport with her and being active in fun ways together? In our family, it has been a very good experience to learn things together. My husband, son, and I went to a parkour gym today and will be doing a 4-week beginner series together. (By the way: I am way too old for parkour; I hurt! A lot.) We hike together, etc.

[Anonymous]

Do you do any activity as a family that is physically active, like bike riding or hiking?