Why do you care what I decide to do to my son's penis when he is born?

[Anonymous]

Let's debate something less controversial! Abortion anyone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do I care? I care because it is an inhumane practice to do this routinely to newborn boys.

Do I raise it with you? No. But if it comes up, I will not sugarcoat my dismay.

How do I know? Like others have said, when you've had kids you'll realize that at some point you see pretty much all your friends changing diapers in front of you or helping with potty training. Other times, people mention it.

What happens then? I will notice your son's stubby scarred penis and I will flinch. I will try not to do this noticeably for your sake because, what's done is done, and for all I know you may now be better informed and regret it (like my in-laws). But I will feel sympathy for your child, just as I would if you mistreated him in another way.

I will think less of you. I will wonder how you came to that decision, as an educated, smart woman, who I obviously share some values with or we wouldn't be friends. I will feel a little sorry for you too. Because you are either willfully ignorant and have followed what you perceive to be the fashion and had cosmetic surgery on your newborn boy, or you are delusional and have believed the very scant and disputed evidence on the topic without having done any full research into the cultural basis of this.

And then, I feel thankful that I wasn't railroaded into doing this, by a husband, by a doctor, by in-laws or by society. I feel thankful that my boys each have their whole penis and that neither of them will feel bad about this as they get older. I feel bad that at some point, be it 5 or 10, 15 or 20 years from now, when this waning practice is widely believed as archaic you will realize that you made the wrong decision, that you were on the wrong side of this issue and that you will regret it.

Wow lady, get some therapy!!!!!

Hey, I am 100 percent comfortable with my (non) decision to leave my children as they were born. Are you so comfortable with yours?

Yep. 100%. I was there for the circumcision. I know it did not cause my child pain or any damage.

Glad that you are that confident. If the anesthesia and pain killers were appropriate I can see that your statement that it didn't cause pain may be accurate, but please don't kid yourself that it didn't cause damage. Your child's penis is no longer complete - part of it has been removed and it is scarred. Of course it caused damage. Obviously you think this damage is justifiable but don't kid yourself that it didn't cause damage to his body. If you meant emotional damage, that's an entire other topic.

No anesthesia or pain killers. Just a little sweet ease. No scaring, either. He had an excellent doctor do the procedure. And no emotional damage. It is quite normal and appropriate. Really. People like you are so over the top and dramatic. My husband (who happens to be a doctor) insisted on it. He has taken care of some patients with some very nasty infections and other issues due to not being circumcised.

The removable of the foreskin causes scarring. (Not scaring). Where it has healed there is a scar. I don't doubt that you had a good doctor. Of course you have no idea whether there will be any emotional damage. You took the choice away from your son. I'm not saying that there is damage, but simply that you don't know how he will feel about this when he's older. If your husband is truly a doctor, I wonder what his position is on evidence based medicine? Does he routinely recommend removal of other body parts as a way to prevent infections?

[Anonymous]

Honestly, I view circumcision as equivalent to the tribal facial scarring that some of the tribes in Africa do to babies when they are born. Will it ruin the baby's life? Absolutely not. It is the same as FGM? No. But it is altering the child's body unnecessarily at a very young age, and I don't support it. Others may see a religious or cultural benefit from it. That's fine, I don't think it is abuse, but I do think it is a strange choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I view circumcision as equivalent to the tribal facial scarring that some of the tribes in Africa do to babies when they are born. Will it ruin the baby's life? Absolutely not. It is the same as FGM? No. But it is altering the child's body unnecessarily at a very young age, and I don't support it. Others may see a religious or cultural benefit from it. That's fine, I don't think it is abuse, but I do think it is a strange choice.

Good analogy. Except that the foreskin has an important purpose and its removal has a greater impact than facial scarring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, I view circumcision as equivalent to the tribal facial scarring that some of the tribes in Africa do to babies when they are born. Will it ruin the baby's life? Absolutely not. It is the same as FGM? No. But it is altering the child's body unnecessarily at a very young age, and I don't support it. Others may see a religious or cultural benefit from it. That's fine, I don't think it is abuse, but I do think it is a strange choice.

Good analogy. Except that the foreskin has an important purpose and its removal has a greater impact than facial scarring.

Listen, I'm anti-circ, and didn't do it for my boys, but let's not overstate things. It has a purpose. But not a particularly important one, and circ'd men (my husband included) will likely be fine.

For me, there had to be compelling evidence for me to cut my newborn son. And there just isn't about this procedure, which does come with risks.

[Anonymous]

Why don't we have millions of men running around now who are extremely scarred? It is interesting that rarely do fathers get so very hysterical about this issue, but the mother sure do! Quite odd to be that obsessed with your child's and other children's genitalia.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do I care? I care because it is an inhumane practice to do this routinely to newborn boys.

Do I raise it with you? No. But if it comes up, I will not sugarcoat my dismay.

How do I know? Like others have said, when you've had kids you'll realize that at some point you see pretty much all your friends changing diapers in front of you or helping with potty training. Other times, people mention it.

What happens then? I will notice your son's stubby scarred penis and I will flinch. I will try not to do this noticeably for your sake because, what's done is done, and for all I know you may now be better informed and regret it (like my in-laws). But I will feel sympathy for your child, just as I would if you mistreated him in another way.

I will think less of you. I will wonder how you came to that decision, as an educated, smart woman, who I obviously share some values with or we wouldn't be friends. I will feel a little sorry for you too. Because you are either willfully ignorant and have followed what you perceive to be the fashion and had cosmetic surgery on your newborn boy, or you are delusional and have believed the very scant and disputed evidence on the topic without having done any full research into the cultural basis of this.

And then, I feel thankful that I wasn't railroaded into doing this, by a husband, by a doctor, by in-laws or by society. I feel thankful that my boys each have their whole penis and that neither of them will feel bad about this as they get older. I feel bad that at some point, be it 5 or 10, 15 or 20 years from now, when this waning practice is widely believed as archaic you will realize that you made the wrong decision, that you were on the wrong side of this issue and that you will regret it.

Wow lady, get some therapy!!!!!

Hey, I am 100 percent comfortable with my (non) decision to leave my children as they were born. Are you so comfortable with yours?

Yep. 100%. I was there for the circumcision. I know it did not cause my child pain or any damage.

Glad that you are that confident. If the anesthesia and pain killers were appropriate I can see that your statement that it didn't cause pain may be accurate, but please don't kid yourself that it didn't cause damage. Your child's penis is no longer complete - part of it has been removed and it is scarred. Of course it caused damage. Obviously you think this damage is justifiable but don't kid yourself that it didn't cause damage to his body. If you meant emotional damage, that's an entire other topic.

No anesthesia or pain killers. Just a little sweet ease. No scaring, either. He had an excellent doctor do the procedure. And no emotional damage. It is quite normal and appropriate. Really. People like you are so over the top and dramatic. My husband (who happens to be a doctor) insisted on it. He has taken care of some patients with some very nasty infections and other issues due to not being circumcised.

The removable of the foreskin causes scarring. (Not scaring). Where it has healed there is a scar. I don't doubt that you had a good doctor. Of course you have no idea whether there will be any emotional damage. You took the choice away from your son. I'm not saying that there is damage, but simply that you don't know how he will feel about this when he's older. If your husband is truly a doctor, I wonder what his position is on evidence based medicine? Does he routinely recommend removal of other body parts as a way to prevent infections?

Please don't tell me what has happened to my child. This is no scarring. I am certain he will be fine with the decision, mostly because he will be raised in a household in which the adult parents do not get hysterical about minor issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because it's my daughter who's going to have sex with him 16 or so years from now.

Ew.

Why is this a gross idea?

Because caring about the appearance fo the penis your daughter has sex with is helicopter parentign at its most extreme. And yes, pretty gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because it's my daughter who's going to have sex with him 16 or so years from now.

Ew.

Why is this a gross idea?

Because you are thinking about the penis your daughter might prospectivly have sex with. Yes, that is weird, and frankly I'm worried about her privacy much more than I'd worry about the state of anyone's penis.

You're gonna have to explain it to me because I'm stupid. What is weird about anticipating that my daughter will have a sex life someday? Are you just going to leave sex ed up to the schools?

I fixed that for you. You're welcome.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why don't we have millions of men running around now who are extremely scarred? It is interesting that rarely do fathers get so very hysterical about this issue, but the mother sure do! Quite odd to be that obsessed with your child's and other children's genitalia.

This is what I think every time I see one of these threads. Considering the vast majority of grown men...even teens...have been circd in this society, you would think there would be very known epidemic problems based in what the anti-circ team is saying. I have yet to hear of one grown man express any trauma over their circumcisions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why don't we have millions of men running around now who are extremely scarred? It is interesting that rarely do fathers get so very hysterical about this issue, but the mother sure do! Quite odd to be that obsessed with your child's and other children's genitalia.

This is what I think every time I see one of these threads. Considering the vast majority of grown men...even teens...have been circd in this society, you would think there would be very known epidemic problems based in what the anti-circ team is saying. I have yet to hear of one grown man express any trauma over their circumcisions.

No one is saying that millions experience long term trauma. They are saying that they have been scarred and that part of their penis has been removed for cosmetic reasons and that it is not justifiable to put a newborn baby who is unable to consent through this process. Many men express regret that this was done to them and that number will only increase as the procedure becomes less common and as your children become the unusual ones (just like in the rest of the world).

This is primarily a women's board, that is why the majority of people posting here are women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do I care? I care because it is an inhumane practice to do this routinely to newborn boys.

Do I raise it with you? No. But if it comes up, I will not sugarcoat my dismay.

How do I know? Like others have said, when you've had kids you'll realize that at some point you see pretty much all your friends changing diapers in front of you or helping with potty training. Other times, people mention it.

What happens then? I will notice your son's stubby scarred penis and I will flinch. I will try not to do this noticeably for your sake because, what's done is done, and for all I know you may now be better informed and regret it (like my in-laws). But I will feel sympathy for your child, just as I would if you mistreated him in another way.

I will think less of you. I will wonder how you came to that decision, as an educated, smart woman, who I obviously share some values with or we wouldn't be friends. I will feel a little sorry for you too. Because you are either willfully ignorant and have followed what you perceive to be the fashion and had cosmetic surgery on your newborn boy, or you are delusional and have believed the very scant and disputed evidence on the topic without having done any full research into the cultural basis of this.

And then, I feel thankful that I wasn't railroaded into doing this, by a husband, by a doctor, by in-laws or by society. I feel thankful that my boys each have their whole penis and that neither of them will feel bad about this as they get older. I feel bad that at some point, be it 5 or 10, 15 or 20 years from now, when this waning practice is widely believed as archaic you will realize that you made the wrong decision, that you were on the wrong side of this issue and that you will regret it.

You need help!! Stop looking in little babies diapers! Ewww!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do I care? I care because it is an inhumane practice to do this routinely to newborn boys.

Do I raise it with you? No. But if it comes up, I will not sugarcoat my dismay.

How do I know? Like others have said, when you've had kids you'll realize that at some point you see pretty much all your friends changing diapers in front of you or helping with potty training. Other times, people mention it.

What happens then? I will notice your son's stubby scarred penis and I will flinch. I will try not to do this noticeably for your sake because, what's done is done, and for all I know you may now be better informed and regret it (like my in-laws). But I will feel sympathy for your child, just as I would if you mistreated him in another way.

I will think less of you. I will wonder how you came to that decision, as an educated, smart woman, who I obviously share some values with or we wouldn't be friends. I will feel a little sorry for you too. Because you are either willfully ignorant and have followed what you perceive to be the fashion and had cosmetic surgery on your newborn boy, or you are delusional and have believed the very scant and disputed evidence on the topic without having done any full research into the cultural basis of this.

And then, I feel thankful that I wasn't railroaded into doing this, by a husband, by a doctor, by in-laws or by society. I feel thankful that my boys each have their whole penis and that neither of them will feel bad about this as they get older. I feel bad that at some point, be it 5 or 10, 15 or 20 years from now, when this waning practice is widely believed as archaic you will realize that you made the wrong decision, that you were on the wrong side of this issue and that you will regret it.

Wow lady, get some therapy!!!!!

Hey, I am 100 percent comfortable with my (non) decision to leave my children as they were born. Are you so comfortable with yours?

Yep. 100%. I was there for the circumcision. I know it did not cause my child pain or any damage.

Glad that you are that confident. If the anesthesia and pain killers were appropriate I can see that your statement that it didn't cause pain may be accurate, but please don't kid yourself that it didn't cause damage. Your child's penis is no longer complete - part of it has been removed and it is scarred. Of course it caused damage. Obviously you think this damage is justifiable but don't kid yourself that it didn't cause damage to his body. If you meant emotional damage, that's an entire other topic.

Lady, you have an unnatural and sick obsession with little boys penises.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why don't we have millions of men running around now who are extremely scarred? It is interesting that rarely do fathers get so very hysterical about this issue, but the mother sure do! Quite odd to be that obsessed with your child's and other children's genitalia.

This is what I think every time I see one of these threads. Considering the vast majority of grown men...even teens...have been circd in this society, you would think there would be very known epidemic problems based in what the anti-circ team is saying. I have yet to hear of one grown man express any trauma over their circumcisions.

No one is saying that millions experience long term trauma. They are saying that they have been scarred and that part of their penis has been removed for cosmetic reasons and that it is not justifiable to put a newborn baby who is unable to consent through this process. Many men express regret that this was done to them and that number will only increase as the procedure becomes less common and as your children become the unusual ones (just like in the rest of the world).

This is primarily a women's board, that is why the majority of people posting here are women.

My husband is very happy his parents made the choice to circ him. What if yours wishes you had done the same? It is much more traumatic and risky to do it as an adult.

Really, the histrionics around this issue just isn't warranted. It really makes you sound unstable and crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do I care? I care because it is an inhumane practice to do this routinely to newborn boys.

Do I raise it with you? No. But if it comes up, I will not sugarcoat my dismay.

How do I know? Like others have said, when you've had kids you'll realize that at some point you see pretty much all your friends changing diapers in front of you or helping with potty training. Other times, people mention it.

What happens then? I will notice your son's stubby scarred penis and I will flinch. I will try not to do this noticeably for your sake because, what's done is done, and for all I know you may now be better informed and regret it (like my in-laws). But I will feel sympathy for your child, just as I would if you mistreated him in another way.

I will think less of you. I will wonder how you came to that decision, as an educated, smart woman, who I obviously share some values with or we wouldn't be friends. I will feel a little sorry for you too. Because you are either willfully ignorant and have followed what you perceive to be the fashion and had cosmetic surgery on your newborn boy, or you are delusional and have believed the very scant and disputed evidence on the topic without having done any full research into the cultural basis of this.

And then, I feel thankful that I wasn't railroaded into doing this, by a husband, by a doctor, by in-laws or by society. I feel thankful that my boys each have their whole penis and that neither of them will feel bad about this as they get older. I feel bad that at some point, be it 5 or 10, 15 or 20 years from now, when this waning practice is widely believed as archaic you will realize that you made the wrong decision, that you were on the wrong side of this issue and that you will regret it.

You need help!! Stop looking in little babies diapers! Ewww!

Hm. It's not very easy not to look into a baby's diaper while you change it. You need to wipe him clean, for example. Do you suggest that people do this blindfolded? When you have children you'll realize that often you will end up helping friends and changing their kids diapers or taking them to go potty as they are older or making their baby smile or handing them a toy while they change them. And many kids go through a stage where it's hard to keep clothes on them.