Breast Implants for 19 Year Old Daughter

[Anonymous]

Ask if she can wait until after college. By then she can see where her body has settled, there may still be some development to come.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m so comflicted. I maybe all the people saying she should wait are maybe really not flat chested. I am. And let me tell you that it really really impacted my dating life. It’s almost like missing a limb. There are a lot of guys out there that just won’t date a girl with no breasts. You can say — oh they are shallow and you’re better off without them. But I’m not sure that’s true. I feel llle my life might have been different had I had more guys interested. I had a pretty face and was thin and a pretty good personality. But having no breasts at all really narrows the field.

It also strikes me as somewhat hypocritical that people are very supportive of trans people getting top surgery because if they identify as female it’s important to have breasts. But a cis gender woman who never develops breasts is considered vain and shallow if she wants surgery to get the same thing?

So I guess for me it would really depend on whether my daughter seemed like she was just the type who is never satisfied and is trying to make small adjustments to things that are basically fine, or whether she’s very far out of the norm and is trying to bring herself more into socially expected physical norms. I’d say the same thing about a nose job.

And I don’t think it’s creepy for a dad to ask this, if his daughter has brought him into the conversation by asking for his help in getting the mother on board.

I haven't experienced this or ever heard of this AT ALL.

--A cup

That’s my post and I’m like a AA and AAA. And I bet you’re actually more like a B cup. Lots of women with what I would consider a really nice rack describe themselves as flat chested!
I think it’s akin to a guy being shorter than 5’6” …. There are still women that will date a super short guy, but it definitely narrows the pool. Breasts are considered so essential to female identity that insurance will pay to replace them if you lose them for a medical reason, so I don’t really blame guys if that’s a requirement for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m so comflicted. I maybe all the people saying she should wait are maybe really not flat chested. I am. And let me tell you that it really really impacted my dating life. It’s almost like missing a limb. There are a lot of guys out there that just won’t date a girl with no breasts. You can say — oh they are shallow and you’re better off without them. But I’m not sure that’s true. I feel llle my life might have been different had I had more guys interested. I had a pretty face and was thin and a pretty good personality. But having no breasts at all really narrows the field.

It also strikes me as somewhat hypocritical that people are very supportive of trans people getting top surgery because if they identify as female it’s important to have breasts. But a cis gender woman who never develops breasts is considered vain and shallow if she wants surgery to get the same thing?

So I guess for me it would really depend on whether my daughter seemed like she was just the type who is never satisfied and is trying to make small adjustments to things that are basically fine, or whether she’s very far out of the norm and is trying to bring herself more into socially expected physical norms. I’d say the same thing about a nose job.

And I don’t think it’s creepy for a dad to ask this, if his daughter has brought him into the conversation by asking for his help in getting the mother on board.

I haven't experienced this or ever heard of this AT ALL.

--A cup

That’s my post and I’m like a AA and AAA. And I bet you’re actually more like a B cup. Lots of women with what I would consider a really nice rack describe themselves as flat chested!
I think it’s akin to a guy being shorter than 5’6” …. There are still women that will date a super short guy, but it definitely narrows the pool. Breasts are considered so essential to female identity that insurance will pay to replace them if you lose them for a medical reason, so I don’t really blame guys if that’s a requirement for them.

I’m also flat-flat. I totally believe it. I’ve always dated plenty, but I have a pretty face and a nice butt and legs annd some guys are really into that. Even still, I’m positive my lack of boobs has turned some guys off. I’ve heard more than once, “you’d be perfect if only….” And I’ve had 2 offers from men to buy me implants. All that is fine because I had other attractive enough attributes, but what pp says does not sound off-base to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m so comflicted. I maybe all the people saying she should wait are maybe really not flat chested. I am. And let me tell you that it really really impacted my dating life. It’s almost like missing a limb. There are a lot of guys out there that just won’t date a girl with no breasts. You can say — oh they are shallow and you’re better off without them. But I’m not sure that’s true. I feel llle my life might have been different had I had more guys interested. I had a pretty face and was thin and a pretty good personality. But having no breasts at all really narrows the field.

It also strikes me as somewhat hypocritical that people are very supportive of trans people getting top surgery because if they identify as female it’s important to have breasts. But a cis gender woman who never develops breasts is considered vain and shallow if she wants surgery to get the same thing?

So I guess for me it would really depend on whether my daughter seemed like she was just the type who is never satisfied and is trying to make small adjustments to things that are basically fine, or whether she’s very far out of the norm and is trying to bring herself more into socially expected physical norms. I’d say the same thing about a nose job.

And I don’t think it’s creepy for a dad to ask this, if his daughter has brought him into the conversation by asking for his help in getting the mother on board.

I haven't experienced this or ever heard of this AT ALL.

--A cup

That’s my post and I’m like a AA and AAA. And I bet you’re actually more like a B cup. Lots of women with what I would consider a really nice rack describe themselves as flat chested!
I think it’s akin to a guy being shorter than 5’6” …. There are still women that will date a super short guy, but it definitely narrows the pool. Breasts are considered so essential to female identity that insurance will pay to replace them if you lose them for a medical reason, so I don’t really blame guys if that’s a requirement for them.

I’m also flat-flat. I totally believe it. I’ve always dated plenty, but I have a pretty face and a nice butt and legs annd some guys are really into that. Even still, I’m positive my lack of boobs has turned some guys off. I’ve heard more than once, “you’d be perfect if only….” And I’ve had 2 offers from men to buy me implants. All that is fine because I had other attractive enough attributes, but what pp says does not sound off-base to me.

Your ex boyfriends suck.

When I was 19 and very skinny/small (as many teens are), I was having a summer fling with a guy and I lamented to him my small boobs, and he said I needed to find a guy who was into small boobs. I said yeah maybe some guys can deal, but he was like “no you’ll find a guy who is INTO small boobs, like prefers them”. It blew my mind that this could be true. As it turns out, I had several boyfriends through college who were totally down (never complained!) and looking back, they definitely had a “type” since all their girlfriends were super small and petite. Which is pretty normal for guys to be into. I met my dh at the end of college and he’s a butt guy (ironic because I also wouldn’t have said I have a butt, but he is obsessed with mine) and probably not “into” small boobs but he is into small-overall women. So usually that comes with small boobs.

In any event, after kids my formerly 32a boobs are a pretty perfect 32c (which are smaller than they sound but stil pretty great and perky at 50). No 19 year old should be getting this surgery, esp not funded (even if indirectly) by her parents.

[Anonymous]

For the PPs, the problem often isn't flat vs not, it is flat vs different body types. Guys will generally be attracted to cute, petite girls with small chests. However, the combination of a flat chest and a larger body type is not viewed as desirable.

That said, 19 seems too young.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If she is an adult who can pay for it, the opinions of her parents don’t matter.

Why do you want your wife’s agreement?

For the record, at 19, it’s a bad idea.

I don’t really believe “she can pay for it.” If she is 100% supporting herself plus has an extra 10k lying around then ok. But saying “she can pay for it” while her parents bankroll her rent, car, phone, healthcare, insurance, tuition, books, entertainment money, and any other expenses she has means she can’t really pay it.

She needs to be financially independent before she can make the decision to blow a bunch of money on plastic surgery.

[Anonymous]

Having small breasts is way, way better. She just doesn’t understand that yet

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m so comflicted. I maybe all the people saying she should wait are maybe really not flat chested. I am. And let me tell you that it really really impacted my dating life. It’s almost like missing a limb. There are a lot of guys out there that just won’t date a girl with no breasts. You can say — oh they are shallow and you’re better off without them. But I’m not sure that’s true. I feel llle my life might have been different had I had more guys interested. I had a pretty face and was thin and a pretty good personality. But having no breasts at all really narrows the field.

It also strikes me as somewhat hypocritical that people are very supportive of trans people getting top surgery because if they identify as female it’s important to have breasts. But a cis gender woman who never develops breasts is considered vain and shallow if she wants surgery to get the same thing?

So I guess for me it would really depend on whether my daughter seemed like she was just the type who is never satisfied and is trying to make small adjustments to things that are basically fine, or whether she’s very far out of the norm and is trying to bring herself more into socially expected physical norms. I’d say the same thing about a nose job.

And I don’t think it’s creepy for a dad to ask this, if his daughter has brought him into the conversation by asking for his help in getting the mother on board.

I haven't experienced this or ever heard of this AT ALL.

--A cup

That’s my post and I’m like a AA and AAA. And I bet you’re actually more like a B cup. Lots of women with what I would consider a really nice rack describe themselves as flat chested!
I think it’s akin to a guy being shorter than 5’6” …. There are still women that will date a super short guy, but it definitely narrows the pool. Breasts are considered so essential to female identity that insurance will pay to replace them if you lose them for a medical reason, so I don’t really blame guys if that’s a requirement for them.

I’m also flat-flat. I totally believe it. I’ve always dated plenty, but I have a pretty face and a nice butt and legs annd some guys are really into that. Even still, I’m positive my lack of boobs has turned some guys off. I’ve heard more than once, “you’d be perfect if only….” And I’ve had 2 offers from men to buy me implants. All that is fine because I had other attractive enough attributes, but what pp says does not sound off-base to me.

+1 I was a perky A but always wanted to be a B or C. Pregnancy gave me that but they then deflated to a not-perky A.

I will say that I think it has saved me from some predatory guys. I also had/have a very pretty face and figure and got plenty of creepy attention as such. I don’t wish I had been any more attractive than I was when young. Most of my incredibly beautiful friends did not fare well in their choice of life partner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If she is an adult who can pay for it, the opinions of her parents don’t matter.

Why do you want your wife’s agreement?

For the record, at 19, it’s a bad idea.

I don’t really believe “she can pay for it.” If she is 100% supporting herself plus has an extra 10k lying around then ok. But saying “she can pay for it” while her parents bankroll her rent, car, phone, healthcare, insurance, tuition, books, entertainment money, and any other expenses she has means she can’t really pay it.

She needs to be financially independent before she can make the decision to blow a bunch of money on plastic surgery.

This is the piece everyone is skimming over. Yes, sure OP dad has a 19 year old daughter with $10k lying around of total independent wealth and dad's not creepy involved in her life at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m so comflicted. I maybe all the people saying she should wait are maybe really not flat chested. I am. And let me tell you that it really really impacted my dating life. It’s almost like missing a limb. There are a lot of guys out there that just won’t date a girl with no breasts. You can say — oh they are shallow and you’re better off without them. But I’m not sure that’s true. I feel llle my life might have been different had I had more guys interested. I had a pretty face and was thin and a pretty good personality. But having no breasts at all really narrows the field.

It also strikes me as somewhat hypocritical that people are very supportive of trans people getting top surgery because if they identify as female it’s important to have breasts. But a cis gender woman who never develops breasts is considered vain and shallow if she wants surgery to get the same thing?

So I guess for me it would really depend on whether my daughter seemed like she was just the type who is never satisfied and is trying to make small adjustments to things that are basically fine, or whether she’s very far out of the norm and is trying to bring herself more into socially expected physical norms. I’d say the same thing about a nose job.

And I don’t think it’s creepy for a dad to ask this, if his daughter has brought him into the conversation by asking for his help in getting the mother on board.

I haven't experienced this or ever heard of this AT ALL.

--A cup

That’s my post and I’m like a AA and AAA. And I bet you’re actually more like a B cup. Lots of women with what I would consider a really nice rack describe themselves as flat chested!
I think it’s akin to a guy being shorter than 5’6” …. There are still women that will date a super short guy, but it definitely narrows the pool. Breasts are considered so essential to female identity that insurance will pay to replace them if you lose them for a medical reason, so I don’t really blame guys if that’s a requirement for them.

Not really the same. One is able to be changed via surgery, while height is not.

Height is more like skin color/race. It is genetic and unable to alter it with surgery or lifestyle changes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For the PPs, the problem often isn't flat vs not, it is flat vs different body types. Guys will generally be attracted to cute, petite girls with small chests. However, the combination of a flat chest and a larger body type is not viewed as desirable.

That said, 19 seems too young.

This.

[Anonymous]

She doesn't really want implants. She wants the attention that she thinks implants will give her. There are plenty of small chested women who are smart, successful, attractive etc.
She can't figure out how to get whatever attention she is craving with what she's got so she is convinced bigger breasts is the solution.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She doesn't really want implants. She wants the attention that she thinks implants will give her. There are plenty of small chested women who are smart, successful, attractive etc.
She can't figure out how to get whatever attention she is craving with what she's got so she is convinced bigger breasts is the solution.

That's a bit of a shallow way of viewing it, along with the judgement thrown in. Feel the same about people who exercise, or buy clothes other than sweats, or get hair styles, etc.? Something to consider.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:no.

Anyway. When I had my baby girl, I told my MIl that it was so cute my baby had her nose. MIL said "that's not my nose; I got mine chopped off when I was 19". I had no idea what to say to that. FF, my 12 yr old has her grandmother's...new nose. No idea how.

Wow. I swear my son has my new nose (got surgery at age 18). It doesn't look like anyone else's and it looks just like my new one. Hearing this makes me think maybe there is something to epigenetics?

No on boob job. She will probably develop more, and if she takes birth control pills they will also get bigger. Maybe recommend that.

This is so strange. My childhood best friend was the same, she and her sister had very cute noses. The mom also had a very cute tiny (maybe a bit too tiny but it was another era) nose. One day I commented that they all got her nose and the 3 of them laughed.. they definitely didn’t get the pre surgery one (and they were 12 and 14 at the time, theirs was not surgical altered)

[Anonymous]

When I was 19, I was very thin and had little body fat naturally. So I was an A.

I gained a normal amount of weight in the following years and filled out. It was a revelation to date and realize that men loved the way they were and would tell me they were beautiful without prompting. This was from multiple relationships.

Even now as a married person my straight girlfriends tell me they wished they had my chest. I am now a C and honestly very happy with how I look. A lot can change.