Do you judge parents of overweight kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No-but I judge the parents of mean girls/boys. I find that typically runs in families.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a teacher. I see what is sent for snack each day. Yes I judge the parents.

What about the parents who provide a healthy snack/lunch and whose kids are overweight?

That almost never happens. Overweight kids have unhealthy snacks. Chips, sugary “yogurt” drinks, Halloween candy, pudding, taki, etc. (Some thin kids have this too and yes I judge those parents too.)

[Anonymous]

I do and i don't...Because i know for a fact that genetics is key, but I also think parents can do a lot and i believe those who can, owe to their kids to take it seriously.

I have 2 kids, a string bean picky eating 13 yo boy and a 10 yo boy who is currently chubby. Not overweight in a way the pediatrician would comment on, but with chubby rolls of fat on his belly that he himself absolutely hates and comments on regularly.

We raised both exactly the same. We cook from scratch, very healthy meals with good fats, protein, high quality carbs. Big emphasis on avoiding hyper processed foods at home but we occasionnally bake cakes or enjoy some ice cream, no crazy restrictions outside of the house, we teach moderation instead. Kids are signed up for a lot of sports. We model healthy eating and exercise.Lunch boxes are honestly pretty perfect with the exception of one bag of salty type of crunch (pop corn, pretzels, pirate booties, that type of 100 cal snack bag). No sodas or drinking your calories of course etc..We teach our kids nutrition and they are aware and interested.

On paper, i doubt we could do better and for most kids it would be enough.

BUT my 10 yo's appetite is clearly bigger than the average kid. He is hungry and very attracted to fatty, greasy, salty foods, cheese and pasta, creamy sauces and rice etc.. He thinks about food, describes it, really wants seconds, wakes up talking about he wants to eat for dinner etc...

What can you do? He eats tasty healthy food but will spontaneously want to add one more spoon of butter or cream in his mashed potatoes than everyone else, twice the cheese on his pasta, etc.. i could go on. And before you say those are not healthy foods, they are just the occasional side dishes with his veggies and protein. We can't restrict carbs too much either.

When he plays sports, you can see he doesn't run as hard or move as much as the other kids. Spontaneoulsy he clearly burns half the calories of other kids. Sitting at home reading instead of bouncing off the walls.

All this to say: as priviledged parents we can prevent him from being obese or even overweight but we spend a considerable amount of energy and brain space preventing that outcome while trying not to traumatize him with restrictive diets. And we still can't prevent him from being chubby.

[Anonymous]

A little chunk during puberty? Not at all. An obese kindergartener? Yeah, I do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do and i don't...Because i know for a fact that genetics is key, but I also think parents can do a lot and i believe those who can, owe to their kids to take it seriously.

I have 2 kids, a string bean picky eating 13 yo boy and a 10 yo boy who is currently chubby. Not overweight in a way the pediatrician would comment on, but with chubby rolls of fat on his belly that he himself absolutely hates and comments on regularly.

We raised both exactly the same. We cook from scratch, very healthy meals with good fats, protein, high quality carbs. Big emphasis on avoiding hyper processed foods at home but we occasionnally bake cakes or enjoy some ice cream, no crazy restrictions outside of the house, we teach moderation instead. Kids are signed up for a lot of sports. We model healthy eating and exercise.Lunch boxes are honestly pretty perfect with the exception of one bag of salty type of crunch (pop corn, pretzels, pirate booties, that type of 100 cal snack bag). No sodas or drinking your calories of course etc..We teach our kids nutrition and they are aware and interested.

On paper, i doubt we could do better and for most kids it would be enough.

BUT my 10 yo's appetite is clearly bigger than the average kid. He is hungry and very attracted to fatty, greasy, salty foods, cheese and pasta, creamy sauces and rice etc.. He thinks about food, describes it, really wants seconds, wakes up talking about he wants to eat for dinner etc...

What can you do? He eats tasty healthy food but will spontaneously want to add one more spoon of butter or cream in his mashed potatoes than everyone else, twice the cheese on his pasta, etc.. i could go on. And before you say those are not healthy foods, they are just the occasional side dishes with his veggies and protein. We can't restrict carbs too much either.

When he plays sports, you can see he doesn't run as hard or move as much as the other kids. Spontaneoulsy he clearly burns half the calories of other kids. Sitting at home reading instead of bouncing off the walls.

All this to say: as priviledged parents we can prevent him from being obese or even overweight but we spend a considerable amount of energy and brain space preventing that outcome while trying not to traumatize him with restrictive diets. And we still can't prevent him from being chubby.

Agree with this. I have one child that is great at self moderation and one that really struggles with overeating in general, but particularly with carbs, sweets, and junky processed foods.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s very bad parenting to allow your kid to become overweight or obese. Pp is right that a little chunk during puberty is normal. But most kids are way beyond that. It’s part of parenting that you teach them how to eat and how to stay active for their health. Sure some kids struggle more than others but that’s the same for any aspect of parenting. Some kids are a nightmare to potty train but we don’t give up. You’re setting your kid up for a life long struggle when you let them be obese.

[Anonymous]

Everyone judges this. The people who say they don’t are lying

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s very bad parenting to allow your kid to become overweight or obese. Pp is right that a little chunk during puberty is normal. But most kids are way beyond that. It’s part of parenting that you teach them how to eat and how to stay active for their health. Sure some kids struggle more than others but that’s the same for any aspect of parenting. Some kids are a nightmare to potty train but we don’t give up. You’re setting your kid up for a life long struggle when you let them be obese.

Most kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a teacher. I see what is sent for snack each day. Yes I judge the parents.

What about the parents who provide a healthy snack/lunch and whose kids are overweight?

That almost never happens. Overweight kids have unhealthy snacks. Chips, sugary “yogurt” drinks, Halloween candy, pudding, taki, etc. (Some thin kids have this too and yes I judge those parents too.)

My kid was overweight through elementary school due to a medical condition. Nice to know people like you were there to support her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It doesn’t change. Parents of fat kids are simply negligent and/or ignorant.

What if the parents are fit and active and serve healthy food, and only one of the 4 kids has problems with wight in spite of all the family athletic activitiies and healthy meals? Might you consider that there is soemthing you don't know about contribituing to the issue, so you should not judge?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a teacher. I see what is sent for snack each day. Yes I judge the parents.

This. I 100% judge the parents. The blame lies solely with them. Anyone who thinks otherwise is fooling themselves. These parents have set their kids up for lifelong weight issues, low self esteem and likely health problems.
Shame on them

Here's the thing: this is not always true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a teacher. I see what is sent for snack each day. Yes I judge the parents.

What about the parents who provide a healthy snack/lunch and whose kids are overweight?

That almost never happens. Overweight kids have unhealthy snacks. Chips, sugary “yogurt” drinks, Halloween candy, pudding, taki, etc. (Some thin kids have this too and yes I judge those parents too.)

My kid was overweight through elementary school due to a medical condition. Nice to know people like you were there to support her.

Did she bring Doritos and KitKats for snack?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I wonder why they don't provide a better home environment with access to whole, healthy foods rather than processed garbage and place more emphasis on physical activity and sports.

We did that and one of our kids is overweight anyway. He has had more doctors in his short life, starting at birth, than I've had in my entire life. So go ahead and judge, but we are parenting harder than you will ever have to, so be thankful for that and maybe give a little grace to people going through things you cannot imagine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does your answer change if the parents themselves are fit or over weight?

No, but I judge those who do

[Anonymous]

What’s wrong with people. I judge all of you.