Private schools with nice kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We chose St. Andrew's because it was supposed to have nice kids, and we have been incredibly disappointed on that front. I think it all might depend on the class.

Every school depends on the class

Agreed. My kids had vastly different experiences at the same school.

[Anonymous]

it depends on the grade and it even depends on the kids in your child's classes. The downside of the super small classes of a private school is that there are only 12 or so kids in each of your kid's classes.

My kid graduated from an 80 person school last year and was there since 7th grade and had never been in class with at least 25% of the grade.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DD was also shy at 8 and had some trouble making friends. She thrived when we switched her Langley. I highly recommend.

Similar experience with Langley! The kids are so nice and my DD is finding it really easy to make friends and play with lots of kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Potomac?

No

[Anonymous]

Super hard OP.. it's not the school but the class that determines how she will fare with friendships. I also do not agree that private has meanest girls v public. In general you want to go to not a tiny school. Diversity is super important. You can only find your tribe if enough friends to choose from. It's the larger populations best for that.

SSSAS is wonderful. But it does depend on the class. DS class has the absolute nicest most wonderful boys ever. It's unbelievable how great the boys are and they are HS ages now. It's pretty spectacular. DD a couple years younger is more just OK.

Your kid also is still fairly young. I would start looking in MS if you felt it was still a thing for her but private school can be more gentle in that it's not all walks of life - even the DEI kids have to be a certain way and I say this as DEI person

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The problem with privates is that the toxic kids have a lot more power, and tend to have a ripple effect so that a few bad kids can control the culture of the entire grade. So even if 90% of the kids are nice, the overall experience is bad.
Stay in public! if you are worried about academic rigor, just do AAP and load on honors and AP classes in HS!
We have three kids who have been in both and public always is a way more pleasant experience.

This is very good advice

[Anonymous]

Your husband is correct.

Or ask to move to Gen Ed class with less academic pressure.
Beside, if your kid is at Mclean AAP centre, means she qualified and the privates rigor would not match, and then another issue down the road.
Not sure what are you looking for.

[Anonymous]

As the mom of 2 Pvt school kids who lives out Pvt, the Pvt s hook is very much oriented towards most kids who have a prob. I reiterate - love our school but some of the kids are not mean as much as prob kids.

That being said, every class is different.

Also, if your public school has a bad reputation, looking into Pvt is a good option. Cultures are different at every school but specific class is key to any experience for kid so it's kinda a crapshoot

In general, larger size = better opp to find close friends. But if your kid is more sensitive, depends on public school size. Any class more than 18 is going to be independent study for the most part. Teacher can offer only so much support. The kid really needs to be well adjusted all around to handle public successfully in most schools.

Do short answer OP - give it some time but start looking now. Just do visits and talk to those families with same ages. Kids change A TON. At age 8, they will be totally different from age 10-11!!!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Potomac?

No

Yes to Potomac. Kids are very nice. But as others have said, there can be grades that are nicer than others.

If you are looking at K-12s, I think the most important thing may be to try and get into any school as early as you can. Establishing friendships before the kids start entering into the awkward puberty years is easiest.

[Anonymous]

Burgundy Farm. My kid started in sixth grade, and it is a warm, accepting and kind culture. Kids are kids but the culture is stated and emphasized.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Burgundy Farm. My kid started in sixth grade, and it is a warm, accepting and kind culture. Kids are kids but the culture is stated and emphasized.

DC’s bestie in MS left Burgundy Farm after poorly handled bullying incidents.

This was pre-Covid, so it’s been years, and I don’t say this as a ding on Burgundy Farm, which I’ve also heard great things about. I say it only to emphasize what other commenters have said — it depends entirely on any given class or grade in any given year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have an 8yo DD and trying to decide what is best for her. She has two older siblings both thriving in FCPS. My DD is more shy and less confident. She in the AAP program and getting what she needs academically. We are at an AAP center with strong science, math, engineering, band and orchestra. This area (McLean) is very competitive and I don’t think this is the necessarily the best environment for her.

The kids we know who are at certain private schools are not the nicest kids so not sure if those schools would even be better for our daughter. DD plays sports but not at a competitive level. She swims, plays tennis, soccer, golf and soccer at a very beginner level.

What schools are known for having really nice kids?

DD has had some issues with friends this year and think this would be a good excuse to try private. DH thinks the private school mean girls will be worse.

Nice kids are where the nice parents are. Always. If you know more than 3 not so nice parents at a particular school then you will see that that school attracts a certain type of parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have an 8yo DD and trying to decide what is best for her. She has two older siblings both thriving in FCPS. My DD is more shy and less confident. She in the AAP program and getting what she needs academically. We are at an AAP center with strong science, math, engineering, band and orchestra. This area (McLean) is very competitive and I don’t think this is the necessarily the best environment for her.

The kids we know who are at certain private schools are not the nicest kids so not sure if those schools would even be better for our daughter. DD plays sports but not at a competitive level. She swims, plays tennis, soccer, golf and soccer at a very beginner level.

What schools are known for having really nice kids?

DD has had some issues with friends this year and think this would be a good excuse to try private. DH thinks the private school mean girls will be worse.

Nice kids are where the nice parents are. Always. If you know more than 3 not so nice parents at a particular school then you will see that that school attracts a certain type of parent.

I agree with this, but would add that in addition to being nice themselves, parents with nice kids actually hold kindness as a value that they impart to their kids. I cannot stand when parents shrug and say “kids will be kids” and “we need to stay out of it and let them work things out” because they refuse to face the fact that their kid is being a jerk. The nice kids are those whose parents actually give a crap as to whether their kids are nice or not.

[Anonymous]

Has to be a joke. I taught at HC and many of the girls were mean (and so were their moms), completely apathetic, disrespectful, and lazy. I would absolutely steer clear.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree that you should stick with public, you will find shitty kids in all the privates. The one exception is Connolly School of the Holy Child in Potomac. The girls are unbelievably nice. It is not particularly rigorous academically, which might be a part of the reason. But if you are Catholic and Holy Child is geographically workable, that is worth considering.

This has to be a joke? I grew up here and went to a different private, but the holy child girls were notorious for being mean and having really horrible behavior involving a couple of all boys schools. My dd has commented on how dirty the girls play in sports, and some of the things they say on the field, so I doubt anything has changed.

Not a joke. Sorry that your family had a different experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The problem with privates is that the toxic kids have a lot more power, and tend to have a ripple effect so that a few bad kids can control the culture of the entire grade. So even if 90% of the kids are nice, the overall experience is bad.
Stay in public! if you are worried about academic rigor, just do AAP and load on honors and AP classes in HS!
We have three kids who have been in both and public always is a way more pleasant experience.

You’re kidding? Not at the Catholics!

This is 100% accurate. Our education consultant said that the trend in DC independent schools is little to no discipline and that perception aligns with our experience and the experience of our friends in multiple different independents.