I largely agree with you, but a teenaged or young twenty something camp counselor is not a teacher. They aren’t trained about avoiding triggers and meltdowns so sharing the child’s perspective might not result in any change. |
Your kid ain’t ready for camp. |
Why would you send an email? If you are expressing that an approach doesn't work for your child's disability, this is a conversation best had in person, so that it can be interactive and the camp can ask any questions. |
Op here - whoops, this thread went off the rails.
Anyway my question was whether it was worth telling the camp that this approach gave my kid a panic attack. I guess I wasn’t clear in my wording. Apologies for starting a flame war. In the end, I had a 2 min chat about autism, panic attacks and sensory issues and everything was fine after that. Yes, it was disclosed to camp that DD has ASD. Inclusion and all. And ASD DD was not the child misbehaving. It was another kid. Too much chaos, loud sounds, and being worried about the other kid was going to jump on her - set her into her version of an ASD meltdown —- which is covering her ears, cowering in a corner and rocking. She’s pretty good at holding it together in public but sometimes it’s too much. My kid is 100% honest to a fault - it’s one of her ASD traits. We were able to dissect the situation this morning to help kid understand what may have triggered her panic and what kid can do next time they feel overwhelmed. I’m pretty sure there were some trolls having a bit of fun with their interpretation of Autism on this thread. But, for those who “get it” thank you. It’s hard navigating a world that touts inclusion but then says “you are the problem” when you ask for a small accommodation because of your disability. It’s kind of like saying “people in wheelchairs shouldn’t get access to ramps or elevators because it’s their fault they can’t walk up a flight of stairs.” No! That’s why we fought so hard for the Americans with Disabilities Act. Ok, now tell me I’m a bad parent because I helped my 8 yr old. I mean it’s not like autism comes with communication challenges…oh wait, it does… |
To be clear, when I would talk to my kid about incidents, it was not with the goal of sharing his perspective. It was to try to figure out what the trigger was so we could help him next time. With a school and an IEP the goal was also to understand if the IEP had been implemented. I also needed a better understanding of the events to know if my kid was getting better or not. Sometimes the adult reporting would insert a lot of overheated language and when I figured out what happened I would realize that in fact his melt downs were improving. (Data collection IOW.) For a camp though I would probably pull him if there was a meltdown big enough for a call home unless the camp was SN or were really clear that they wanted him back. |
Thanks for the follow up. I don’t think it is unreasonable to ask for a quiet space for her if she gets overwhelmed especially if they bill themselves as inclusive. I’m glad she is going back. She should not be punished for getting overwhelmed. That said, I don’t think you can expect camp will be free of noise and chaos. |
Op here - thank you. The accommodation was to allow her to take a break and do a quiet activity like coloring for a few minutes if she felt overwhelmed. There was no expectation on other kids accommodating or not being typical kids. |
This child needs a 1:1 or a special needs camp. You have described behavior outside the realm of typical even for ASD at age 8. |
wtf?? Being able to take a quiet break is absolutely standard and not outside the realm at all. What is up with you people and your very strange beliefs. Is it that you have kids who are not autistic but you got them diagnosed? A quiet break is also pretty easy for a camp to implement. If the camp billed itself as inclusive I don’t think that is asking for too much. |
A NT camp does not have the staff to watch your child during a meltdown. This accommodation should never have been requested. |
The camp billed itself as “inclusive” per OP. And letting a child do a quiet activity is not a massive burden. Maybe you should ask yourself why you feel the need to make comments like this. |
You can let the counselor know about YOUR child's needs and a few tips on how to support your child (but you should have already done that given the special needs), but as to criticizing their overall approach, please do not do that. This is a teenage counselor doing the best they can with probably not enough training and support. If your kid needs more than that, you need to find a different camp. This counselor is doing their best to keep the group safe and under control. |
+1. If your child had an injured arm and needed to not do certain activities at sports camp and you said nothing to the camp beforehand, would you get mad at the camp if your child made the injury worse by doing drills they shouldn’t have been doing? Your child needs to advocate for themself if you won’t advocate for them. And the camp is flying blind. And it sounds like kids were out of control and counselor tried to deescalate through quiet and a schoolwork threat, which I doubt many children really believed…. This sounds like a situation where your child being more easily overwhelmed by the situation and perhaps struggling with perspective taking made them take everything more literally and thus, seriously. |
No, it’s not the camp’s job to accommodate meltdowns. |
I’ve worked camps like this many times, of course it’s a burden and takes time and attention away from the group. Don’t send your kid to a camp alone if they can’t handle it. Which clearly they can’t. |