Nursing home for undocumented friend

[Anonymous]

To the OP.

I would pursue the religious angle. Maybe even women's shelters.

If you are able, can you keep your own copies of details for her, like some background on her family, id card numbers, where she was born, etc. Something to share with her embassy if she loses her documents.

Was she a caregiver? Maybe some of her prior employers will help?

[Anonymous]

OP, thanks for your care and concern for your friend. What a sad situation for her. With no home to go back to, no family to help, no benefits here...she is lucky she is not entirely alone.

It breaks my heart to read all the inhumane and unkind replies here. If you have family, health, benefits, a safety net: you are LUCKIER than this woman. You are not more deserving.

There but for the grace of God go I, so they say. Or theee but for the sheer luck of how and where I was born, go I.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To the OP.

I would pursue the religious angle. Maybe even women's shelters.

If you are able, can you keep your own copies of details for her, like some background on her family, id card numbers, where she was born, etc. Something to share with her embassy if she loses her documents.

Was she a caregiver? Maybe some of her prior employers will help?

Women’s shelter would not provide care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for your care and concern for your friend. What a sad situation for her. With no home to go back to, no family to help, no benefits here...she is lucky she is not entirely alone.

It breaks my heart to read all the inhumane and unkind replies here. If you have family, health, benefits, a safety net: you are LUCKIER than this woman. You are not more deserving.

There but for the grace of God go I, so they say. Or theee but for the sheer luck of how and where I was born, go I.

I suggest you go and do volunteer work with the elderly here in the US.

Do you have any idea of how many elderly Americans who are not in good health nor do they have funds to pay for medical expenses/prescriptions, do not have family who cares about them, their social security benefits are completely inadequate for basic living expenses, they wind up losing their homes or selling at a loss because of medical debt, and Federal/state/local programs have no support to provide them?

To be clear, these are people who do not have addiction issues, have worked and paid taxes their entire lives, raised their families without any government assistance, paid their bills on time/no debt, and have lived frugally. They are the ones who deserve your sympathy, or at least your vote to start funding care programs for the elderly.

If you think we are inhumane here in the US, I would challenge you to take two or three elderly Americans on a one-way flight to any other country (including European countries) and tell the authorities to take care of them until they die. How many do you think would accommodate them?

Zero. That's how many. Zero.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for your care and concern for your friend. What a sad situation for her. With no home to go back to, no family to help, no benefits here...she is lucky she is not entirely alone.

It breaks my heart to read all the inhumane and unkind replies here. If you have family, health, benefits, a safety net: you are LUCKIER than this woman. You are not more deserving.

There but for the grace of God go I, so they say. Or theee but for the sheer luck of how and where I was born, go I.

Um, no, you skipped right over the highly significant part where the person took a series of intentional actions for 15 years that landed her where she is today.

She could have stayed “where [she] was born” but she chose not to do that and willingly chose instead to commit a federal crime by staying in the US illegally. It’s not like a bolt of lightning struck her “where she was born” and she was powerless over that lightning. She had agency, obviously, and she made choices.

You assume facts not in evidence- namely that she didn’t have family or support in the country she left. And therefore she’s un”lucky” but we are all “luckier.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for your care and concern for your friend. What a sad situation for her. With no home to go back to, no family to help, no benefits here...she is lucky she is not entirely alone.

It breaks my heart to read all the inhumane and unkind replies here. If you have family, health, benefits, a safety net: you are LUCKIER than this woman. You are not more deserving.

There but for the grace of God go I, so they say. Or theee but for the sheer luck of how and where I was born, go I.

You are not alone in being horrified at the lack of empathy or the awareness of good fortune displayed in this thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, if you desperately want to help her then take her in and take care of her yourself.

I don’t have the space or resources to provide 24/7 care

OP, and I say this gently -- neither does America.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for your care and concern for your friend. What a sad situation for her. With no home to go back to, no family to help, no benefits here...she is lucky she is not entirely alone.

It breaks my heart to read all the inhumane and unkind replies here. If you have family, health, benefits, a safety net: you are LUCKIER than this woman. You are not more deserving.

There but for the grace of God go I, so they say. Or theee but for the sheer luck of how and where I was born, go I.

You are not alone in being horrified at the lack of empathy or the awareness of good fortune displayed in this thread.

You are very mightier than thou and assuming plenty of things yourself.

I haven't seen anyone in this thread gloating or not being willing to acknowledge their privilege. On the other had, I have seen people be quite factual about how strained resources are for people who have been paying into the system and will likely never recoup that themselves. They might get marginal assistance, but not enough.

And again, not gloating, but factually -- this was not an unforeseen problem. Was there no plan at all, other than to assume someone(s) else would have to help?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for your care and concern for your friend. What a sad situation for her. With no home to go back to, no family to help, no benefits here...she is lucky she is not entirely alone.

It breaks my heart to read all the inhumane and unkind replies here. If you have family, health, benefits, a safety net: you are LUCKIER than this woman. You are not more deserving.

There but for the grace of God go I, so they say. Or theee but for the sheer luck of how and where I was born, go I.

Um, no, you skipped right over the highly significant part where the person took a series of intentional actions for 15 years that landed her where she is today.

She could have stayed “where [she] was born” but she chose not to do that and willingly chose instead to commit a federal crime by staying in the US illegally. It’s not like a bolt of lightning struck her “where she was born” and she was powerless over that lightning. She had agency, obviously, and she made choices.

You assume facts not in evidence- namely that she didn’t have family or support in the country she left. And therefore she’s un”lucky” but we are all “luckier.”

Elon Musk and his equally odious brother are here illegally. Are you campaigning to have them removed? How about Melania?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for your care and concern for your friend. What a sad situation for her. With no home to go back to, no family to help, no benefits here...she is lucky she is not entirely alone.

It breaks my heart to read all the inhumane and unkind replies here. If you have family, health, benefits, a safety net: you are LUCKIER than this woman. You are not more deserving.

There but for the grace of God go I, so they say. Or theee but for the sheer luck of how and where I was born, go I.

You are not alone in being horrified at the lack of empathy or the awareness of good fortune displayed in this thread.

You are very mightier than thou and assuming plenty of things yourself.

I haven't seen anyone in this thread gloating or not being willing to acknowledge their privilege. On the other had, I have seen people be quite factual about how strained resources are for people who have been paying into the system and will likely never recoup that themselves. They might get marginal assistance, but not enough.

And again, not gloating, but factually -- this was not an unforeseen problem. Was there no plan at all, other than to assume someone(s) else would have to help?

People have directly stated they have no empathy. Someone suggested shipping her to Canada for assisted suicide (that’s not how it works FYI, but the cruel intention was there). I highly doubt any of you making these callous remarks are doing anything to help suffering Americans either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for your care and concern for your friend. What a sad situation for her. With no home to go back to, no family to help, no benefits here...she is lucky she is not entirely alone.

It breaks my heart to read all the inhumane and unkind replies here. If you have family, health, benefits, a safety net: you are LUCKIER than this woman. You are not more deserving.

There but for the grace of God go I, so they say. Or theee but for the sheer luck of how and where I was born, go I.

You are not alone in being horrified at the lack of empathy or the awareness of good fortune displayed in this thread.

You are very mightier than thou and assuming plenty of things yourself.

I haven't seen anyone in this thread gloating or not being willing to acknowledge their privilege. On the other had, I have seen people be quite factual about how strained resources are for people who have been paying into the system and will likely never recoup that themselves. They might get marginal assistance, but not enough.

And again, not gloating, but factually -- this was not an unforeseen problem. Was there no plan at all, other than to assume someone(s) else would have to help?

People have directly stated they have no empathy. Someone suggested shipping her to Canada for assisted suicide (that’s not how it works FYI, but the cruel intention was there). I highly doubt any of you making these callous remarks are doing anything to help suffering Americans either.

You couldn't be more wrong.

Have YOU done years of volunteer work with the elderly? Gone to nursing facilities? Visited elderly in their homes? Brought them meals, helped them with hygiene and house cleaning? Advocated with local elected officials for better services?

At a minimum, have you gone out and purchased items needed by your local, poor elderly and donated them - even small things like lotions, hygiene items, maybe a couple of word puzzle books?

If you have not then why not? In 2025, will you pledge to call your local Agency on Aging and offer your time?

If not, perhaps look at your own callousness. There is significant need for the poor elderly in this country. Put up or shut up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, thanks for your care and concern for your friend. What a sad situation for her. With no home to go back to, no family to help, no benefits here...she is lucky she is not entirely alone.

It breaks my heart to read all the inhumane and unkind replies here. If you have family, health, benefits, a safety net: you are LUCKIER than this woman. You are not more deserving.

There but for the grace of God go I, so they say. Or theee but for the sheer luck of how and where I was born, go I.

You are not alone in being horrified at the lack of empathy or the awareness of good fortune displayed in this thread.

You are very mightier than thou and assuming plenty of things yourself.

I haven't seen anyone in this thread gloating or not being willing to acknowledge their privilege. On the other had, I have seen people be quite factual about how strained resources are for people who have been paying into the system and will likely never recoup that themselves. They might get marginal assistance, but not enough.

And again, not gloating, but factually -- this was not an unforeseen problem. Was there no plan at all, other than to assume someone(s) else would have to help?

People have directly stated they have no empathy. Someone suggested shipping her to Canada for assisted suicide (that’s not how it works FYI, but the cruel intention was there). I highly doubt any of you making these callous remarks are doing anything to help suffering Americans either.

You couldn't be more wrong.

Have YOU done years of volunteer work with the elderly? Gone to nursing facilities? Visited elderly in their homes? Brought them meals, helped them with hygiene and house cleaning? Advocated with local elected officials for better services?

At a minimum, have you gone out and purchased items needed by your local, poor elderly and donated them - even small things like lotions, hygiene items, maybe a couple of word puzzle books?

If you have not then why not? In 2025, will you pledge to call your local Agency on Aging and offer your time?

If not, perhaps look at your own callousness. There is significant need for the poor elderly in this country. Put up or shut up.

Agree with this. People don’t get compassion points because they feel sad about something, they need to do something or else they are just as “callous” as everyone else.

[Anonymous]

Contact La Clinica del Pueblo or CASA. They may have some ideas

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:JFC is this true? We live in MontCo, have a disabled kid who will never live independently and we know WE will never be able to rely on Medicaid.

Anonymous wrote:Some jurisdictions -- including DC and Montgomery County -- have medicaid paid with local dollars (not federal) for undocumented immigrants. It doesn't cover everything and I don't know if it covers long term care.

Assuming you've done financial planning right, he will be eligible for SSI and medicaid when he turns 18.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of undocumented, like fully off the grid? Or in the system in some temporary status?

Nope. No temporary status, just expired guest visa.

So an illegal immigrant. Which means she hasn’t paid into the system and it owes her nothing.

In 15 years of working, she has most assuredly paid into the system. But, yes, it will give her nothing.

Exactly.

OP, try this place. https://www.unityhealthcare.org/locations/upper-cardozo-health-center

They work with immigrants and people who can't afford to pay for healthcare. They have social workers who will meet with you and guide you.