How to have a good Christmas for kids when we are in a lot of debt?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Idk. Maybe I’m the outlier but if you’re in a lot of debt I really don’t see what spending $400-$500 on gifts for the 3 kids at Christmas could possibly do to make or break you. Buy your kids Christmas gifts and then double down on debt repayment in January, it’s not their fault you guys got into a bunch of debt.

I was thinking this the whole time. Not to mention how much stuff there is out there for pennies on the dollar in second hand stores and online.
I thought the debt is crushing OP and OP's Christmas spirit and we all will be helping with the ideas of how to get out.

And this is why there are still many Americans paying off Christmas 2022... the best way to get out of the bondage of debt is to stop spending. Good job, OP!

Well duh but she chose a heck of a time to suddenly care about debt. Christmas presents won’t be the difference between getting into debt or out of a lot of it.

[Anonymous]

2005-2015 were very lean years for us. The first two years, my parents had to buy everything. We did very few presents that weren’t really necessities and focused instead on establishing new traditions around experiences. We did a lot of decorating with received cards, handmade items, and found objects. We found the corniest Christmas movies to watch together.

[Anonymous]

OP, what is your budget? I think if you do one “bigger” gift for each kid, and some small things, maybe something cozy like a blanket or fuzzy slippers, plus candy in the stockings, that will be nice. I was at Costco recently, and they had a ton of festive candy.

[Anonymous]

Don’t tell your kids anything about the money. There is no need to worry them. I agree with the small free activities especially for the elementary kids and for the middle schooler maybe spend a bit more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they can handle it and understand the boundary, each kid gets one call out day from school to go to the movies and lunch with mom and dad. Plan it in advance, make it adjacent to a long weekend anyway. Only if they can understand not to talk about it too too much outside of the family.

Worst. Idea. Ever.

Not only are these kids poor, you want them to be poorly educated too?!?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they can handle it and understand the boundary, each kid gets one call out day from school to go to the movies and lunch with mom and dad. Plan it in advance, make it adjacent to a long weekend anyway. Only if they can understand not to talk about it too too much outside of the family.

Worst. Idea. Ever.

Not only are these kids poor, you want them to be poorly educated too?!?!

DP. I think it’s a good idea! It’s a special treat.

[Anonymous]

After my mother divorced, money was MORE than tight.

She gave my sister and me $10 to buy her gifts. We were 5 and 6. We walked to the drug store and got her a Santa wind chime and a bottle of Windsong perfume (this was the 70s).

I have no memory of what we got as gifts. But I vividly remember the Christmas eve dinner we got to plan -- pigs in a blanket (hot dogs in crescent rolls) and raw cookie dough. We ate on the couch (never before allowed) while watching Christmas cartoons.

Best Christmas ever.

OP -- ask your kids what would make Christmas special. You might be surprised.

[Anonymous]

Get a few gifts from Buy Nothing groups or from Walmart. Visit 5Below.

What exactly is on your kid's Christmas lists? If you post the lists, we could crowdsource affordable ways to get the gifts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they can handle it and understand the boundary, each kid gets one call out day from school to go to the movies and lunch with mom and dad. Plan it in advance, make it adjacent to a long weekend anyway. Only if they can understand not to talk about it too too much outside of the family.

Worst. Idea. Ever.

Not only are these kids poor, you want them to be poorly educated too?!?!

DP. I think it’s a good idea! It’s a special treat.

No. Kids already miss enough school for illnesses. I would skip school to attend an important family function but not for this idiocy. Just find childcare for the other two kids on a weekend and do it. Or each kid gets two solo outings, one with each parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are a ton of free activities and you can drive around looking at lights. You can bake together and make new decorations. Have family movie nights to watch holiday movies. Have a special breakfast and nice dinner on Christmas. These things will make the season special. As for gifts, make a budget and stick to it. Be guided by what your kids want - if it’s a bunch of small things do that and if it’s a large gift do that.

Matching pjs are not cheap and not good present bang for the buck but o agree otherwise with the sentiment of doing fun family activities.

Agree, skip the matching PJs this year

I picked up some adult sized pajamas at Carter’s today for $10 and matching kid pj’s for $6. You can do it on the cheap.

That’s still not a good use of money that would be better spent on actual gifts. If no one needs PJs, why blow $40 on unnecessary clothing items for a one morning instagram moment instead of using it on board games or art supplies or something else that will last?

$24 for the kids seems worth it for me. Get them in the next size up.
Art supplies will get blown through in a weekend.

Is the gift for you or your kids? Young kids want things they can create or play with. They don’t want clothes, especially pajamas.

[Anonymous]

Christmas is not about the amount of presents. If you've been raising your children this way, now is a great time to change that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they can handle it and understand the boundary, each kid gets one call out day from school to go to the movies and lunch with mom and dad. Plan it in advance, make it adjacent to a long weekend anyway. Only if they can understand not to talk about it too too much outside of the family.

Worst. Idea. Ever.

Not only are these kids poor, you want them to be poorly educated too?!?!

DP. I think it’s a good idea! It’s a special treat.

No. Kids already miss enough school for illnesses. I would skip school to attend an important family function but not for this idiocy. Just find childcare for the other two kids on a weekend and do it. Or each kid gets two solo outings, one with each parent.

Okay. Then don’t do it.

[Anonymous]

Agree with PPs to stretch your money - buy nothing groups, Five Below (which has LOTS of things my middle schooler and high schooler love!), etc. There are also so many free things you can do to be festive this time of year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sad that Christmas has become almost exclusively about the gifts.

The children's service at my church is really good and involves passing around candlelight and singing outside upon completion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are a ton of free activities and you can drive around looking at lights. You can bake together and make new decorations. Have family movie nights to watch holiday movies. Have a special breakfast and nice dinner on Christmas. These things will make the season special. As for gifts, make a budget and stick to it. Be guided by what your kids want - if it’s a bunch of small things do that and if it’s a large gift do that.

Matching pjs are not cheap and not good present bang for the buck but o agree otherwise with the sentiment of doing fun family activities.

Agree, skip the matching PJs this year

I picked up some adult sized pajamas at Carter’s today for $10 and matching kid pj’s for $6. You can do it on the cheap.

That’s still not a good use of money that would be better spent on actual gifts. If no one needs PJs, why blow $40 on unnecessary clothing items for a one morning instagram moment instead of using it on board games or art supplies or something else that will last?

$24 for the kids seems worth it for me. Get them in the next size up.
Art supplies will get blown through in a weekend.

Is the gift for you or your kids? Young kids want things they can create or play with. They don’t want clothes, especially pajamas.

If your kids have a dozen pairs of pjs then I guess new ones are NBD. We didn't have a lot when I was a kid and every year my grandma made us pajamas with a matching stuffed animal. It was the one present we got to open Xmas eve and we looked forward to it all year. It was the only time we really got new nightgowns or pajamas--we had one set and if we outgrew it maybe we'd get a new nightgown in the summer, but the boys wore tees and underwear. For some people new pajamas is really a big deal. My mom continued that tradition for her own grandkids for many years but without the matching stuffed animas.

Side story about the stuffed animals--my depression era save everything grandma stuffed them with old pantyhose. (At least some of them.) One of my brothers took his with him when he married and his kids played with them until one sprang a hole and leaked pantyhose all over the house. His wife couldn't not figure out where these pantyhose were coming from and was getting pissed at my brother for having an affair until she tracked them down to grandmas stuffies. Ha! That must have been 30 yrs ago now. Maybe more.