My child attends an elite college. It is overrated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do any kids want to go to a top college for an intellectual challenge? That’s what mine is hoping for. If these schools are filled with students who just want to be in elite social circles, this is disappointing.

Mine are at different ivies and that was a main goal. Both have said for the first time they have a large group of friends who like learning and want to discuss what books they read for fun, what research they do with professors, and interesting classes. Elite social circles has never come up. I only read about that on DCUM but it does not exist irl at ivies. Competition in clubs happens with some, but that is at Gtown, WM, UVa...everywhere. Sure they complain about tough professors sometimes but they also respect the tough yet good professors. They each had only 2-3 students who "got" them in HS. Those others went off to elite/ivy or top LAC or W&M which overlaps a lot with the intellectual vibe of ivies. Ivies are highly intellectual and yet also down to earth kids. There is far more socioeconomic diversity than their DMV private which had no poor kids. Racial diversity too which is great.

I so want this for my kids who love to discuss current events, books, anything and everything. They found that the move from private MS/HS to public HS has helped them find more of their kind, which surprised me. We feel so fortunate to have found a high performing public school system with diversity and grounded families. I'm crossing my fingers that the admissions process still works and that kids who love learning are getting into the top schools.

Nope. Most reasonable outcome is your state flagship, which will likely have the same vibe as the high performing public. Honors programs will be even better

"Nope" to everyone sounds like sour grapes. Both of mine went from public HS to Ivy. Also a few friends. Of course, it's not a likely outcome, but also not a Nope for everyone.

[Anonymous]

I have a kid at a lower ivy and another at a state school.

I was really disappointed in a lot of the aspects of the lower ivy-- the classes are big, the advising is poor. The housing and food is terrible, as is much of the physical plant. A kid who wants to get to know their prof, do research, etc. certainly has the opportunity to do that. But that's not every kid. I mean, my kid is a SENIOR and still has an average class size of 70+. (There would be opportunities to find smaller classes, but in her major, this is the norm.)

That said, my kid got an amazing job offer and the industry where she wants to work (wall street) tends to recruit mainly from very top schools. During the internship process, she was wooed by a lot of employers. There's nothing special about her-- in fact, her GPA is on the low side-- but employers love the pedigree and were inviting her to recruiting weekends, etc.

She's surrounded by hard-working students who prioritize education and studying. She's surrounded with a diverse set of students from all over the country (and world). Unfortunately, they are quite rich and expect to travel to exotic locales every break. But overall, that's a really good experience.

My kid at the state school seems to be having a great time. Classes are roughly the same size as above. The campus is HUGE (the best thing about the top schools, imho, is that they are the perfect SIZE). She's enjoying going to football games and that kind of thing. She complains that since most students are in-state, a lot of them go home on the weekends and after freshman year, kids tend to move off campus, so there is less community.

She's younger, so it's harder to say about job prospects, but I have some concerns-- certainly, some kids from the university get great jobs. But it seems like the fraction of kids who get great jobs is much smaller. And I'm sure she won't be wooed-- it will take a lot more gumption. And it may require being a stand-out from her school (high GPA, awards, etc) to differentiate herself. Oh-- a really great thing is that AP credits count at the state school (they don't count for anything at the lower ivy), so in four years, I think she may be able to finish a masters degree.

So there are really tradeoffs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It would be so interesting to be in the same room as the rest of the posters here for just one night…

It would be miserable. A room filled with tiger and helicopter parents whose entire personality is where their kids go to school and who are desperate for you to be impressed by it. No thanks.

THIS!