Husband is finalist for dream job in Chicago

[Anonymous]

We have nice, settled lives in DC, with 2 kids (one in ES), manageable jobs (govt/non-profit lawyers) and commutes (upper NW DC home near metro). We've lived in DC for over 10 years. DH is being recruited for an in-house position in Chicago that's sort of a dream job. It's in an industry he is very interested in and would allow him to practice his specialty. The issue is that I am sort of at my dream job right now, which I just moved into earlier this year and will be an intense period of work through the next year and a half. There is a small possibility I could pitch doing my job 100% remotely, but probably not until after this "intense" period is over.

Would you make the move? Winters in Chicago sucks. I assume traffic/commute is bad from the 'burbs and living in the city, you have the schools issue. I'm not sure lifestyle-wise, moving to Chicago would be an improvement.

Is it easy to meet new people? Truth be told, even after living here for 10 years, we just have a lot of superficial friendships and most of our close friends have moved away.

[Anonymous]

For the difference in housing you could probably afford private. There are so many awesome, walkable, leafy neighborhoods in Chicago that I wouldn't bother with the suburbs. Maybe Oak Park which is close in and good train links. I don't know much about Evanston and the other Northern suburbs. Driving traffic in Chicago is bad (like here) but mass transit is better.

I am not going to sugarcoat the winters but regardless it's an amazing city that's much cheaper to raise a family in than DC.

[Anonymous]

Forgot to add the meeting people part -- I had trouble at first but once I found an activity and met people that way I found folks to be very friendly. Kids would probably facilitate that too. If you went to a midwestern school with a football program you'll be able to find friends instantly by just wandering around and reading t shirts

[Anonymous]

I'm from Chicago but live in DC now.

Chicago is the best city in the world for 2-3 months per year; there's truly nothing like it. I love Chicago people, Chicago food, Chicago culture. My family is there and occasionally I'll toss around the idea of moving back.

BUT...If you've got two kids and don't live in the city but have to commute to the city, I'd strongly warn against moving there. Even a place like Oak Park, which has a kind of urban neighborhood vibe in the safety of the burbs can be a beast of a commute.

Winters are brutal...you require a garage. I can't tell you how many times I had to dig out my car, heat up the locks/doors with a hair dryer, and scrape my windshield.

The wind makes your face hurt. It actually makes your face hurt.

As someone who has moved from city to city fairly often, I know that the allure of a new place can be overwhelming...especially if you've been in DC for 10 years. But if you've got a good thing going here, I wouldn't do it.

[Anonymous]

Evanston and northern suburbs are great. I'd jump on it. Chicago is one of the friendliest big cities I've lived in, and I've lived in a lot of cities.

[Anonymous]

I love Chicago - and I think it would be easy to settle there. People are much friendlier there and more open. My BFF of 25 years lives there. I would generally move there in a heartbeat.

In your position, I would take pause. If you're really in your dream job, I'd want to have a good long talk with DH about his dream job vs. yours. Are your respective jobs a once-in-a-lifetime chance? What's the pay differential? Would moving give you a dramatically improved quality of life. (COL is probably about the same if not higher in Chicago) Are either one of you able to get a similar dream job in DC/Chicago respectively. I also would be concerned that your resume would take more of hit if you left your job in such a short time. (Easily explained in person and understandable - if you get an interview)

Another option is for him to commute for year. You can get easy, quick flight back and forth from Chicago.

This is a really hard decision - for me, there would have to be some tremendous benefits for the family to make the move.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For the difference in housing you could probably afford private. There are so many awesome, walkable, leafy neighborhoods in Chicago that I wouldn't bother with the suburbs. Maybe Oak Park which is close in and good train links. I don't know much about Evanston and the other Northern suburbs. Driving traffic in Chicago is bad (like here) but mass transit is better.

I am not going to sugarcoat the winters but regardless it's an amazing city that's much cheaper to raise a family in than DC.

What!? The CTA is a joke. As much as we complain about the DC metro system...it could be WAY worse. Broken down buses and standing out in the snow waiting for the El....Pass...just pass.

[Anonymous]

I've lived in both Chicago and DC. It's a tough call--pros and cons to both. Chicago has nicer people (imo) but DC has better weather. Chicago feels like a much bigger city. Traffic is bad in both places, so where you live in proximity to work is important.

Bottom line is that where you live and whether you like it is such a personal decision. Have you spent much time in Chicago?

[Anonymous]

The weather is absolutely brutal in Chicago many months of the year. I wouldn't move. I like someone's idea for your dh to commute.

[Anonymous]

Op here. I don't think we would make the move unless he could delay moving until I finish my project. I've actually been at my current job for 10 years, but just moved into this position recently. It would not be good to bail on this project-- would definitely burn bridges. I could also pitch doing my job remotely, which is not going to be easy.

We've both been to Chicago many times and do love the city, but not the winters. We've lived in cold places before and it sucks.

I'm also worried about living in the 'burbs and having an hour+ commute.

It also seems daunting to start over in a new city at this stage.

[Anonymous]

Chicago is one of the all time great cities in the world.

If you have the money, choose a northern suburb. The train from the northern suburbs is fantastic and very comfortable and social. A great time to unwind and read, talk, check emails, etc.

Lake Forest is possibly the most beautiful town I have ever seen.

[Anonymous]

9:40 I think the COL is lower in Chicago than DC, especially when you do an apples to apples comparison of neighborhoods/suburbs.

[Anonymous]

I have done the commute on the metra from Evanston and Wilmette and it isn't bad at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The weather is absolutely brutal in Chicago many months of the year. I wouldn't move. I like someone's idea for your dh to commute.

LOL Oh please - it is not that bad, Princess. You bundle up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:9:40 I think the COL is lower in Chicago than DC, especially when you do an apples to apples comparison of neighborhoods/suburbs.

Housing is SO MUCH CHEAPER in Chicago than DC. My parents in DC like to debate me on this point, but it's ridiculous. My friends live in a trendy Chicago neighborhood brownstone, 3br and 3 ba for $600,000. WITH A GARAGE AND BASEMENT. Come on. A million bucks in DMV will buy you a shack.