Is this a horrible habit?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are similar ages (10, 8, 5). They don’t watch tv during the week except for 15-20 min after breakfast most days. In the afternoon is activities or they play. Now that the weather is nice, my eldest does homework and reads and younger two are on the trampoline (best investment ever made).

They watch a lot more tv on weekends and we don’t limit it. We also have a lot of activities, but they probably watch 2-3 hours a day. We are watching a lot of National Geographic documentaries together and all 3 kids love them (and parents too).

The worst is when I am trying to work and my youngest is home alone because sick or his activity was canceled (happened yesterday). He watched 20 min of Ntflix until husband came home. This does not happen often, but we all do what we have to and sometimes that is putting kids in front of the TV.


For all the people that say tht screen time is different now from when we were young, that is true. I wonder if our parents thought the same about our time and how much time we spend on the couch watching tv (I know I did).

OP - I would love to get a trampoline but my husband refuses. Said that there is too much liability (he is a lawyer) and also we have a ton of friends who are in the medical profession who said it is a horrible idea. Not sure how I can change his mind!

Pathetic

From the Cleveland Clinic: https://health.clevelandclinic.org/surprising-dangers-of-trampolines-for-kids

I wonder about the mental health consequences of over-protecting kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they are talking (mentally engaging) about what's on TV/screen, it's no worse than other indoor unathletic playtime.

If they aren't getting exercise every day, they should do some kind of workout videos.

No worse than board games that can teach social skills and strategy or art projects that develop hand strength and coordination or reading that can develop vocabulary, etc etc....?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are similar ages (10, 8, 5). They don’t watch tv during the week except for 15-20 min after breakfast most days. In the afternoon is activities or they play. Now that the weather is nice, my eldest does homework and reads and younger two are on the trampoline (best investment ever made).

They watch a lot more tv on weekends and we don’t limit it. We also have a lot of activities, but they probably watch 2-3 hours a day. We are watching a lot of National Geographic documentaries together and all 3 kids love them (and parents too).

The worst is when I am trying to work and my youngest is home alone because sick or his activity was canceled (happened yesterday). He watched 20 min of Ntflix until husband came home. This does not happen often, but we all do what we have to and sometimes that is putting kids in front of the TV.


For all the people that say tht screen time is different now from when we were young, that is true. I wonder if our parents thought the same about our time and how much time we spend on the couch watching tv (I know I did).

OP - I would love to get a trampoline but my husband refuses. Said that there is too much liability (he is a lawyer) and also we have a ton of friends who are in the medical profession who said it is a horrible idea. Not sure how I can change his mind!

Pathetic

From the Cleveland Clinic: https://health.clevelandclinic.org/surprising-dangers-of-trampolines-for-kids

I wonder about the mental health consequences of over-protecting kids.

Not getting a trampoline is not over protecting. It is very common for kids to have serious accidents, I personally know one teen who fractured her spine and has metal and pins in her back as a result and another kid who was just standing by a trampoline when the jumper landed on him and broke his collarbone. Also, if your insurance finds out you have one many will cancel you.

[Anonymous]

I’m a single parent and my DS in now 19. I’m a teacher and I used to clean houses on weekends to make extra money. My son would watch TV for hours while I cleaned (later he started helping me). Now he’s in a top college often mentioned on DCUM. I watched TV for hours every day as a kid as did my friends. We are all successful people.

My one caveat comes from being a teacher and hearing from parents that their kid is allowed to be unsupervised on a tablet/phone. This is not okay. One of my kindergarteners started attacking other students at recess. He had been watching mixed martial arts videos online and his mom said she had no idea. She put on a kid’s video but didn’t supervise him so she eventually found he switched to these violent videos.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a single parent and my DS in now 19. I’m a teacher and I used to clean houses on weekends to make extra money. My son would watch TV for hours while I cleaned (later he started helping me). Now he’s in a top college often mentioned on DCUM. I watched TV for hours every day as a kid as did my friends. We are all successful people.

My one caveat comes from being a teacher and hearing from parents that their kid is allowed to be unsupervised on a tablet/phone. This is not okay. One of my kindergarteners started attacking other students at recess. He had been watching mixed martial arts videos online and his mom said she had no idea. She put on a kid’s video but didn’t supervise him so she eventually found he switched to these violent videos.

Yes - there is a kid in my DD's class with a ton of issues with violence, fighting, and inappropriate language (we are talking telling the teacher to F off) and he reports that he is constantly on Youtube. They are military with a lot of kids and I think the mom has a lot on her plate so I can see how it happens but the behavior is bad and the connection is obvious.

[Anonymous]

Totally fine!!

[Anonymous]

OP I don't think it's a horrible habit, but you have to decide what you want your kids to do.

I can solo parent my similarly aged kids while cooking dinner and they are reading, crafting, hanging out in the yard, or doing other non-screen things. They don't have access to a tablet except occasionally over the summer (in a public space of the house) for math review. We've been low screen during the week since they were little and this is what they are used to. It took work at first but now it's easy.

On the weekends they get movie night - just them because we parents are usually busy despite our intention to watch as a family - and Wii time together so we are definitely not no screens at all.

Your kids will likely grow up just as creative and intelligent and happy as mine. I just enjoy seeing what mine come up with to fill their time and they seem happy with it, so that's what we do. But you do you.

[Anonymous]

I definitely watched two hours of tv a day as a kid. As a parent, my kids barely get two hours a week of screen time and I keep them too busy for it and say ho more than half the time they ask.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP I don't think it's a horrible habit, but you have to decide what you want your kids to do.

I can solo parent my similarly aged kids while cooking dinner and they are reading, crafting, hanging out in the yard, or doing other non-screen things. They don't have access to a tablet except occasionally over the summer (in a public space of the house) for math review. We've been low screen during the week since they were little and this is what they are used to. It took work at first but now it's easy.

On the weekends they get movie night - just them because we parents are usually busy despite our intention to watch as a family - and Wii time together so we are definitely not no screens at all.

Your kids will likely grow up just as creative and intelligent and happy as mine. I just enjoy seeing what mine come up with to fill their time and they seem happy with it, so that's what we do. But you do you.

This. There is a big gap between "horrible" and "not ideal." You and your DH have to decide how you want to parent your kids. The internet can't answer that for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op - thank you! I feel like a horrible mother when I read the thread about no phones and people say their kids don’t watch any tv and they are 10.

I am going to hold off on phones until at least 13 (hoping more like high school) but haven’t been able to hold off on the tv thing.

They are extreme outliers. I have 2 elementary school kids and I can’t think of anyone we know who doesn’t allow tv. As long as they still have activities, spend time outside playing, see friends, get enough family time sans screens (like we do family dinner w no screens), get their homework done/spend time reading every day, eat healthy, and get enough sleep, and as long as they’re not watching age inappropriate stuff, screens aren’t a big deal. It’s a balance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will be the voice of dissent I guess. I don’t think this is great for a weekday. If they are doing activities they probably aren’t home for very long. I prefer for my kids to do things like color and draw, read, play with toys together, chat about their days with us. I instituted a no weekday tv rule this school year and I have noticed a massive difference in their behavior and sleep. It’s a lot harder for the parents but I have found it to be worth it.

I will say I think the actual tv is better than a tablet. Even Disney has some stuff that’s not appropriate for an early elementary kid. My seven year old will watch those shows they are aimed more at a preteen with a friend and the sassy back talk definitely seeps into her interactions with us.

OP- yes I would prefer that they didn't watch tv during the week. But during the week I am pretty much solo parenting. So I end up letting them use their tablets/watch tv when I am making dinner or having to take the dog outside to go to the bathroom.

You asked for opinions!

OP - sorry yes I do appreciate your opinion. How do you do it when you are solo parenting? I guess that is my biggest hurdle.

NP, but there's lots of stuff kids that age can do by themselves while you make dinner. Our TV is out of sight and the tablet is reserved for long car rides (and usually not charged in a drawer somewhere), so it doesn't come up. TV is a family activity, reserved for days with no school. The kids read or play with toys.

I don't think it's a huge deal either way (and it's a lot harder to change once the expectation is there), but it's possible,

Op - yes I definitely think it’s hard to change once you start something.

Sometimes I have to walk the dog up and down the street - so I usually make sure the youngest is watching something so I can take 5-10 minutes to do this. I can see the house the whole time but it is my only option.

I’m not anti screens but this is not the only option. Why can’t you take the kids w you while you walk the dog? I live somewhere much colder than DC (upper Midwest) and we go outside for walks daily unless it’s raining or like below zero temps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will be the voice of dissent I guess. I don’t think this is great for a weekday. If they are doing activities they probably aren’t home for very long. I prefer for my kids to do things like color and draw, read, play with toys together, chat about their days with us. I instituted a no weekday tv rule this school year and I have noticed a massive difference in their behavior and sleep. It’s a lot harder for the parents but I have found it to be worth it.

I will say I think the actual tv is better than a tablet. Even Disney has some stuff that’s not appropriate for an early elementary kid. My seven year old will watch those shows they are aimed more at a preteen with a friend and the sassy back talk definitely seeps into her interactions with us.

OP- yes I would prefer that they didn't watch tv during the week. But during the week I am pretty much solo parenting. So I end up letting them use their tablets/watch tv when I am making dinner or having to take the dog outside to go to the bathroom.

You asked for opinions!

OP - sorry yes I do appreciate your opinion. How do you do it when you are solo parenting? I guess that is my biggest hurdle.

NP, but there's lots of stuff kids that age can do by themselves while you make dinner. Our TV is out of sight and the tablet is reserved for long car rides (and usually not charged in a drawer somewhere), so it doesn't come up. TV is a family activity, reserved for days with no school. The kids read or play with toys.

I don't think it's a huge deal either way (and it's a lot harder to change once the expectation is there), but it's possible,

Op - yes I definitely think it’s hard to change once you start something.

Sometimes I have to walk the dog up and down the street - so I usually make sure the youngest is watching something so I can take 5-10 minutes to do this. I can see the house the whole time but it is my only option.

Why is her watching TV the only option as opposed to her drawing or playing with Legos?

OP - mostly because if they are watching TV when I walk the dog I know I have a solid 10-15 minutes where they won't be getting into some sort of trouble or hurting themselves. Probably a bad rationale I know.

Earlier you said 5-10 mins now it’s 10-15 so I’m guessing it’s really 15-20…

[Anonymous]

Looking back on my teens' childhood, I know that they gained a lot from free time doing imaginative play, making crafty/artsy things on their own, writing stories, and reading. It can harder than giving them a screen, so you might not be able to make it happen while you're out walking the dog or whatever. But I do think kids need and benefit from time to think and imagine and create things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will be the voice of dissent I guess. I don’t think this is great for a weekday. If they are doing activities they probably aren’t home for very long. I prefer for my kids to do things like color and draw, read, play with toys together, chat about their days with us. I instituted a no weekday tv rule this school year and I have noticed a massive difference in their behavior and sleep. It’s a lot harder for the parents but I have found it to be worth it.

I will say I think the actual tv is better than a tablet. Even Disney has some stuff that’s not appropriate for an early elementary kid. My seven year old will watch those shows they are aimed more at a preteen with a friend and the sassy back talk definitely seeps into her interactions with us.

I agree. But I don’t want to come off as judgmental— especially because you have 3 kids and are solo parenting a lot of the time. That is really hard. But I don’t think this is great or “fine.” My family doesn’t do this— we only have the tv on to watch a specific show or movie, so maybe a couple of times a week. I also agree that tv is way better than just giving your kids tablets and letting them do whatever.

But—Is it the end of the world to watch 1-2 hours of tv a day? No, I think we watched way more tv as kids, and it was fine. We have to make imperfect choices as parents and I totally get why you are making this one! But if you have the means to cut down on it, I would try to.

[Anonymous]

Did people here really watch more tv than 1-2 hours a day in elementary school? I don’t think I did! We watched maybe one half hour show after dinner.