bachelorette weekend away at 15 weeks

[Anonymous]

I'm a bridesmaid in a wedding this fall and have a bachelorette party planned in August when I will (hopefully) be 15 weeks. Other bridesmaids organized many activities over the course of the weekend (in NYC) and have asked that everyone pay one of them $750 to cover all costs (hotel, meals, taxis, drinking, etc.). Seeing that I won't be drinking, what do other suggest I do about the cost? I don't want to seem cheap, but I certainly don't want to pay for alcohol I won't be drinking.

[Anonymous]

Whoops, wrong forum. Sorry about that.

[Anonymous]

Pay the $750.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Pay the $750.

+1

[Anonymous]

Do they know you're pregnant yet?

Honestly, my first thought was "that's the cost of being a bridesmaid, suck it up." That is a crazy expensive expectation for a bachelorette party, but assuming you're okay with it other than paying for alcohol, I'd probably be likely just to pay the standard rate and not say anything. I don't know how the math is breaking down, but I'd feel bad after they sent out the cost coming back and saying "Oh, I won't be drinking, please distribute that cost to everyone else."

Now, if they don't know you're pregnant and haven't factored in that you won't be drinking, you could approach them and say "Hey, I've been keeping this quiet because it's still early, but I'm pregnant. I won't be drinking at the bachelorette party, so I don't know if that changes your cost calculations on alcohol. If it does, can we take that amount off of what I'm contributing?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pay the $750.

+1

+2 I have attended two bachelorettes preg, just ponied up both times. Not about you, its about contributing to the bride's weekend. If you aren't going at all thats a different story.