this genre of instagram mom confessions is off putting - why???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are we going to talk about her eyebrows? Or is that for the Beauty forum and not General Parenting?

+1

I noticed her eyebrows before I noticed her children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are we going to talk about her eyebrows? Or is that for the Beauty forum and not General Parenting?

+1

I noticed her eyebrows before I noticed her children.

Also heavy top and bottom clumped together spider lashes. Face is a mess.

I don't care if people judge me for this, I gasped at the picture of the mom breastfeeding a "56 month old." GFTO with that crap. She is 4.5 years old and almost kindergarten age. "56 month old." RIDICULOUS. I'm disgusted by that level of extended breastfeeding and doubly disgusted it would be put on the internet.

[Anonymous]

It’s off putting because it’s performative, attention-seeking, and as others pointed out, will accomplish nothing other than getting “likes”.
It’s like being undernourished and choosing to just eat candy for the quick sugar high. Sure, it feels good, but it’s not going to solve the real problem.

[Anonymous]

Disagree with you all. I'm glad it's happening. For centuries mothers have been allowed no interior life, and even now it is barely, and only uncomfortably, acknowledged. (Any great novels with Mom protagonists? No! Definitely not before 1970s.)

So does that mean you have to think any and all mommy insta posts or memoirs are worthy -- and somehow not navel-gazing and attention seeking? NO. They probably are.

But it is ridiculous to carve out mother confessions from all other confessionals. And sexist and myopic too.

So if you do not like endless self-regard, fine. But then stay off all social media. No need to declare mommy blogging any more narcissistic than the next pundit/commentator/social media maven (or bitch about a lady's mascara).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Disagree with you all. I'm glad it's happening. For centuries mothers have been allowed no interior life, and even now it is barely, and only uncomfortably, acknowledged. (Any great novels with Mom protagonists? No! Definitely not before 1970s.)

So does that mean you have to think any and all mommy insta posts or memoirs are worthy -- and somehow not navel-gazing and attention seeking? NO. They probably are.

But it is ridiculous to carve out mother confessions from all other confessionals. And sexist and myopic too.

So if you do not like endless self-regard, fine. But then stay off all social media. No need to declare mommy blogging any more narcissistic than the next pundit/commentator/social media maven (or bitch about a lady's mascara).

Took me literally 5 seconds: The Awakening, Main street. Give me 5 more seconds I'd I've give you more.

I don't think there is anything especially problematic about this category of performed, attention seeking Instagram posts. It's all empty. It *might* only qualify for more scorn because it proposes to be about making connections and about real-life, when it's all still self-promotion and fakery. I don't know enough about social media to know if most public posts also do the "let's connect and be real real together" pose.

[Anonymous]

The DollMaker. I think Sons and Lovers have sections from the tortured mother's perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Disagree with you all. I'm glad it's happening. For centuries mothers have been allowed no interior life, and even now it is barely, and only uncomfortably, acknowledged. (Any great novels with Mom protagonists? No! Definitely not before 1970s.)

So does that mean you have to think any and all mommy insta posts or memoirs are worthy -- and somehow not navel-gazing and attention seeking? NO. They probably are.

But it is ridiculous to carve out mother confessions from all other confessionals. And sexist and myopic too.

So if you do not like endless self-regard, fine. But then stay off all social media. No need to declare mommy blogging any more narcissistic than the next pundit/commentator/social media maven (or bitch about a lady's mascara).

Uh, Mrs. Murry from A Wrinkle in Time? Try harder, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t stand all the fake doe eyed crying with mascara running pics. Who needs to take a picture of themself crying?? Any leaving the mascara for show - blech!!

Right! Like I’m trying to understand the mindset of people whose first inclination when they cry is to grab their phone and snap a selfie. Like, what?!?!

This bothers me the most. There are so many women on social media right now snapping selfies of sobbing. It creeps me out, especially the women who are crying for serious, awful reasons. What is going through your mind when you do that??? Ugh.

Or people who take pictures of their kids crying. It’s bizarre and sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Disagree with you all. I'm glad it's happening. For centuries mothers have been allowed no interior life, and even now it is barely, and only uncomfortably, acknowledged. (Any great novels with Mom protagonists? No! Definitely not before 1970s.)

So does that mean you have to think any and all mommy insta posts or memoirs are worthy -- and somehow not navel-gazing and attention seeking? NO. They probably are.

But it is ridiculous to carve out mother confessions from all other confessionals. And sexist and myopic too.

So if you do not like endless self-regard, fine. But then stay off all social media. No need to declare mommy blogging any more narcissistic than the next pundit/commentator/social media maven (or bitch about a lady's mascara).

Uh, Mrs. Murry from A Wrinkle in Time? Try harder, PP.

Doubt PP is much of a novel fan.

[Anonymous]

Disagree with you all. I'm glad it's happening. For centuries mothers have been allowed no interior life, and even now it is barely, and only uncomfortably, acknowledged. (Any great novels with Mom protagonists? No! Definitely not before 1970s.)

So does that mean you have to think any and all mommy insta posts or memoirs are worthy -- and somehow not navel-gazing and attention seeking? NO. They probably are.

But it is ridiculous to carve out mother confessions from all other confessionals. And sexist and myopic too.

So if you do not like endless self-regard, fine. But then stay off all social media. No need to declare mommy blogging any more narcissistic than the next pundit/commentator/social media maven (or bitch about a lady's mascara).

Uh, Mrs. Murry from A Wrinkle in Time? Try harder, PP.

Doubt PP is much of a novel fan.

Ha ha. I teach this stuff.

Wrinkle in Time was basically the 1970s, but Mrs. Murry was a side character. Certainly not a protagonist in any sense of the word.

Carol in Main Street was not even a mother until like the last chapter, and certainly by no stretch of the imagination was the book about her being a mother.

Sons and Lovers the mother was at best the antagonist - though I'll give you points that at least it dealt with the parent-child relationship.

The Awakening is perhaps the closest, but it is basically the first of its kind, and a feminist forerunner for this reason.

The Dollmaker?? A little random.

None except the Awakening--the exception that proves the rule--remotely look into the "interior life" of a mother as mother. So the fact that this is the "best" of mother "protagonists" is a very sad way to prove my point, and that PPs think this could prove the opposite show how little we really want to hear from mothers as mothers.

(Also: Not exactly a new idea or controversial that "mothers" haven't really figured as protagonists in "great" Western literature... Yours is an uphill battle friends!)

[Anonymous]

You gotta go back to Instagram. Entire thing is off putting. Off Facebook, Insta and all such nonsense.

[Anonymous]

I actually like when people post the parts of their lives that aren't perfect.

What I don't like (and what seems to be the case here) is IG accounts of women with perfect bodies, perfect homes, perfect clothes/hair/makeup, perfect husbands, perfect children, perfect meals......and the random "see I'm a hot mess too! I'm just like you!" picture.

Uhhh, no, you're not like me. I'm working in sweats with no makeup while my fat husband farts on the couch and my kid eats a frozen pizza and watches YouTube and the floor is covered in toys, with nary a inspirational quote or bible verse to be seen on the walls. B!tch, please, you don't see my mascara running when I cry because I don't have the time to put it on.

The whole thing is designed to get people to pay you money. Look relatable while still having the perfect life, "buy my coaching and you too can have all this!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Disagree with you all. I'm glad it's happening. For centuries mothers have been allowed no interior life, and even now it is barely, and only uncomfortably, acknowledged. (Any great novels with Mom protagonists? No! Definitely not before 1970s.)

So does that mean you have to think any and all mommy insta posts or memoirs are worthy -- and somehow not navel-gazing and attention seeking? NO. They probably are.

But it is ridiculous to carve out mother confessions from all other confessionals. And sexist and myopic too.

So if you do not like endless self-regard, fine. But then stay off all social media. No need to declare mommy blogging any more narcissistic than the next pundit/commentator/social media maven (or bitch about a lady's mascara).

Uh, Mrs. Murry from A Wrinkle in Time? Try harder, PP.

Doubt PP is much of a novel fan.

Maybe this deserves it's own S/O thread...but Kitty's struggle as a young, overwhelmed mother in Anna Karenina includes this beautifully written line that has always stuck with me -- “These joys were so trifling as to be as imperceptible as grains of gold among the sand, and in moments of depression she saw nothing but the sand; yet there were brighter moments when she felt nothing but joy, saw nothing but the gold.”
Ha ha. I teach this stuff.

Wrinkle in Time was basically the 1970s, but Mrs. Murry was a side character. Certainly not a protagonist in any sense of the word.

Carol in Main Street was not even a mother until like the last chapter, and certainly by no stretch of the imagination was the book about her being a mother.

Sons and Lovers the mother was at best the antagonist - though I'll give you points that at least it dealt with the parent-child relationship.

The Awakening is perhaps the closest, but it is basically the first of its kind, and a feminist forerunner for this reason.

The Dollmaker?? A little random.

None except the Awakening--the exception that proves the rule--remotely look into the "interior life" of a mother as mother. So the fact that this is the "best" of mother "protagonists" is a very sad way to prove my point, and that PPs think this could prove the opposite show how little we really want to hear from mothers as mothers.

(Also: Not exactly a new idea or controversial that "mothers" haven't really figured as protagonists in "great" Western literature... Yours is an uphill battle friends!)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Disagree with you all. I'm glad it's happening. For centuries mothers have been allowed no interior life, and even now it is barely, and only uncomfortably, acknowledged. (Any great novels with Mom protagonists? No! Definitely not before 1970s.)

So does that mean you have to think any and all mommy insta posts or memoirs are worthy -- and somehow not navel-gazing and attention seeking? NO. They probably are.

But it is ridiculous to carve out mother confessions from all other confessionals. And sexist and myopic too.

So if you do not like endless self-regard, fine. But then stay off all social media. No need to declare mommy blogging any more narcissistic than the next pundit/commentator/social media maven (or bitch about a lady's mascara).

Uh, Mrs. Murry from A Wrinkle in Time? Try harder, PP.

Doubt PP is much of a novel fan.

Ha ha. I teach this stuff.

Wrinkle in Time was basically the 1970s, but Mrs. Murry was a side character. Certainly not a protagonist in any sense of the word.

Carol in Main Street was not even a mother until like the last chapter, and certainly by no stretch of the imagination was the book about her being a mother.

Sons and Lovers the mother was at best the antagonist - though I'll give you points that at least it dealt with the parent-child relationship.

The Awakening is perhaps the closest, but it is basically the first of its kind, and a feminist forerunner for this reason.

The Dollmaker?? A little random.

None except the Awakening--the exception that proves the rule--remotely look into the "interior life" of a mother as mother. So the fact that this is the "best" of mother "protagonists" is a very sad way to prove my point, and that PPs think this could prove the opposite show how little we really want to hear from mothers as mothers.

(Also: Not exactly a new idea or controversial that "mothers" haven't really figured as protagonists in "great" Western literature... Yours is an uphill battle friends!)

Maybe this deserves it's own S/O thread...but Kitty's struggle as a young, overwhelmed mother in Anna Karenina includes this beautifully written line that has always stuck with me -- “These joys were so trifling as to be as imperceptible as grains of gold among the sand, and in moments of depression she saw nothing but the sand; yet there were brighter moments when she felt nothing but joy, saw nothing but the gold.”


formatting issue above

[Anonymous]

I agree that it’s annoying and I think it’s because it’s a sign of privilege. Xyz ruined my day and isn’t it so funny? I can only laugh about it becUse I’ll bounce back with no problem. I’ve caught myself doing it too. It’s almost like a humblebrag.