Dating in the DMV vs. other parts of the Country

[Anonymous]

I also think DC (and cities in general with a large, liberal, highly-educated population) has a a lot of people are simply are okay being single. When you are perfectly capable of earning your own living and have tons of social and professional options at your fingertips, there's less pressure to hurry up and marry and settle down. In my hometown, women get the side eye if they're not married and popping out babies by 22. There just isn't much opportunity for women to have any other kind of life in Backwoodsville.

Signed,
One of the DC single ladies who doesn't prioritize dating, and who is probably ruining some dude's day by not responding to his entitled call for my attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also think DC (and cities in general with a large, liberal, highly-educated population) has a a lot of people are simply are okay being single. When you are perfectly capable of earning your own living and have tons of social and professional options at your fingertips, there's less pressure to hurry up and marry and settle down. In my hometown, women get the side eye if they're not married and popping out babies by 22. There just isn't much opportunity for women to have any other kind of life in Backwoodsville.

Signed,
One of the DC single ladies who doesn't prioritize dating, and who is probably ruining some dude's day by not responding to his entitled call for my attention.

I doubt you are ruining any dude’s day.

[Anonymous]

I am married and met my DH in DC. I have never had an issue meeting and dating men, but I also had a different kind of standards from most of my other friends. I looked for personality, confidence, passion and looks. I have dated several men of different ages and backgrounds. I even dated a bar tender with a high school diploma for a month or two (I have a PhD, but only a masters at the time) he was hot and was interesting for a little while. I finally settled for a much older guy (that my friends would probably not date since I was 26 and he was 39) who was attractive, smart, great personality and best sex. It helped that he was very worldly and had ab interesting career. I did not settle for the best looking or richest guy because the ones I met were boring.
Most of my friends ended up “settling” eventually for the “ok” guy. I have never done online dating probably because I never needed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also think DC (and cities in general with a large, liberal, highly-educated population) has a a lot of people are simply are okay being single. When you are perfectly capable of earning your own living and have tons of social and professional options at your fingertips, there's less pressure to hurry up and marry and settle down. In my hometown, women get the side eye if they're not married and popping out babies by 22. There just isn't much opportunity for women to have any other kind of life in Backwoodsville.

Signed,
One of the DC single ladies who doesn't prioritize dating, and who is probably ruining some dude's day by not responding to his entitled call for my attention.

I doubt you are ruining any dude’s day.

NP. Maybe not his day, but the guys who yell bitch or d*ke when you won’t smile clearly feel entitled and that you have wronged them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not so much that it's harder to date in DC, it's that there's no real incentive to settle. In other parts of the country, the eligible pool is smaller, and people are aware of that. So one-toothed Cleetus at the country & western bar doesn't seem like such a bad option. In DC, there is always the chance an even better match will be around the corner, so people are less wiling to date people who are simply "okay" but not a particularly great match. It's not just about attractiveness or wealth/status, either, but about having a complementary personality and life goals.

From my sample pool of friends and coworkers, the relationships that began in DC seem to be much deeper and more dynamic than relationships that began elsewhere. The bar to entry was higher, and the quality shows.

You don’t find quality here. You find educated and BMW-equipped. Quality is something else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Married now, but I found it very easy. There are tons of great men out there. I’m attractive, but had practically no career, and I still had no problems.

You just have to learn where to find them, put yourself in positions where you can meet them, and be fun/friendly/outgoing. I know people say women who can’t find men have standards that are way too high, but l had even multimillionaires who were interested. You just have to go places in real life where they’ll be, online isn’t the best place to find rich guys.

Some insecure men are threatened by women with successful careers, which may eclipse their own or require lots of time and effort. I wasn't one of those women but have seen it in some of my friends

LOL sure keep telling yourself that!

yeah I mean that's ridiculous. Most men are just fine with a woman with a career who makes good money. It's the attitude that often comes with it that's off putting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also think DC (and cities in general with a large, liberal, highly-educated population) has a a lot of people are simply are okay being single. When you are perfectly capable of earning your own living and have tons of social and professional options at your fingertips, there's less pressure to hurry up and marry and settle down. In my hometown, women get the side eye if they're not married and popping out babies by 22. There just isn't much opportunity for women to have any other kind of life in Backwoodsville.

Signed,
One of the DC single ladies who doesn't prioritize dating, and who is probably ruining some dude's day by not responding to his entitled call for my attention.

I'd like to bend you over

[Anonymous]

What's weird to me is how centered everyone is here on (i) what you do and (ii) how much $ you make. As a guy this is often very close to a woman's first question, and it's a real turnoff. I assume it's because they've been burned before by the large quantity of losers in the area, but jeez.

Also, as a guy it's awesome because if you are even remotely successful there are always many many more women out there then men, and it's only getting better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What's weird to me is how centered everyone is here on (i) what you do and (ii) how much $ you make. As a guy this is often very close to a woman's first question, and it's a real turnoff. I assume it's because they've been burned before by the large quantity of losers in the area, but jeez.

Another guy here, it makes me self conscious to be honest. I thought I was doing well having a Master's degree and a six figure income. The first number in that six figure income is just a 1 however. You read enough posts here, you'd think that's only enough for women to spit on you, if you're lucky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What's weird to me is how centered everyone is here on (i) what you do and (ii) how much $ you make. As a guy this is often very close to a woman's first question, and it's a real turnoff. I assume it's because they've been burned before by the large quantity of losers in the area, but jeez.

Also, as a guy it's awesome because if you are even remotely successful there are always many many more women out there then men, and it's only getting better.

Agreed. My single days in DC were insane - so many smart, beautiful, fit women who must date below their market value. I'm getting married in a week, but I must say DC is probably the best place to be a single, straight man with a good education.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Married now, but I found it very easy. There are tons of great men out there. I’m attractive, but had practically no career, and I still had no problems.

You just have to learn where to find them, put yourself in positions where you can meet them, and be fun/friendly/outgoing. I know people say women who can’t find men have standards that are way too high, but l had even multimillionaires who were interested. You just have to go places in real life where they’ll be, online isn’t the best place to find rich guys.

Some insecure men are threatened by women with successful careers, which may eclipse their own or require lots of time and effort. I wasn't one of those women but have seen it in some of my friends

LOL sure keep telling yourself that!

yeah I mean that's ridiculous. Most men are just fine with a woman with a career who makes good money. It's the attitude that often comes with it that's off putting.

No all successful women I see and know with real successful careers(CEO, directors etc) have partners. Some how these very successful women find partner and pp does not. Maybe the pp is the expectation? Most likely pp is some something midling level professional with no pull or game.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's weird to me is how centered everyone is here on (i) what you do and (ii) how much $ you make. As a guy this is often very close to a woman's first question, and it's a real turnoff. I assume it's because they've been burned before by the large quantity of losers in the area, but jeez.

Also, as a guy it's awesome because if you are even remotely successful there are always many many more women out there then men, and it's only getting better.

Agreed. My single days in DC were insane - so many smart, beautiful, fit women who must date below their market value. I'm getting married in a week, but I must say DC is probably the best place to be a single, straight man with a good education.

It's also a good place to be if you are a single gay man with a good education.

[Anonymous]

I found that dating in NC was easier. The Bible belt tends to guilt trip people into settling down or at least giving the appearance that they are. By 25, people are asking why you don't have kids yet. Up here is a little different. This is a "sinner's" paradise. lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also think DC (and cities in general with a large, liberal, highly-educated population) has a a lot of people are simply are okay being single. When you are perfectly capable of earning your own living and have tons of social and professional options at your fingertips, there's less pressure to hurry up and marry and settle down. In my hometown, women get the side eye if they're not married and popping out babies by 22. There just isn't much opportunity for women to have any other kind of life in Backwoodsville.

Signed,
One of the DC single ladies who doesn't prioritize dating, and who is probably ruining some dude's day by not responding to his entitled call for my attention.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand this is why no one wants to date DC women. So unattractive and off putting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also think DC (and cities in general with a large, liberal, highly-educated population) has a a lot of people are simply are okay being single. When you are perfectly capable of earning your own living and have tons of social and professional options at your fingertips, there's less pressure to hurry up and marry and settle down. In my hometown, women get the side eye if they're not married and popping out babies by 22. There just isn't much opportunity for women to have any other kind of life in Backwoodsville.

Signed,
One of the DC single ladies who doesn't prioritize dating, and who is probably ruining some dude's day by not responding to his entitled call for my attention.

Most of the singles I've met in DC are not OK being single, but got used to it. A lot of time it is not your political views or level of education, it is your inability to love someone. Having a long term relationship or marrying someone is not about your capability to earn your own living. No matter how big your social circle, you still can be longly when you don't have that one person next to you.