What screams *INSECURE FRUMP* to you?

[Anonymous]

There's got to be some middle ground between stripper heels and capris.

[Anonymous]

Don't get the connection between insecure and frump at all. Sometimes those women who "try too hard" are insecure.

Frumpy--frayed clothing. Shoes that don't exactly go with the outift, baggy, long to mid-length skirts.

I know, because I wear all of these Now that I live in the DC metro there is no way I can ever afford to be "polished" looking until I win the lottery, so I am very secure in my frumpiness

[Anonymous]

Stains or grease stains on clothes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well these styles don't necessarily mean your a "frump," but are very difficult for any but the beautiful people to pull off without looking a tad matronly:

- short-sleeve button up shirts (I think only ll bean makes these anymore so we are all probably safe)
- yes, mid calf straight or relaxed capris (not all cropped/ankle length pants)
- trend alert: the wide legged, slightly short ("summer length") pants that are everywhere now. Impossible for all over BMI 18.
- wild ethnic prints (if they are Chicos, not your actual heritage)
- big baggy fisherman sweaters (I like this in theory, but again, only look great on a J Crew model, but not on anyone else)
- Mid-length skirts (Again, like in theory, but in reality...)

These do not look frumpy:http://shop.nordstrom.com/c/womens-collared-button-up-tops

[Anonymous]

God bless them, life is hard, but DC is so full of this stuff I have to comment:

- brown, so much brown. You think it all matches itself, but it doesn't.
- backpacks.... There is never, ever an excuse for a grown woman to wear a backpack. Ever. I would literally prefer if you used a target bag as a handbag.
- merrills
- big droopy breasts. If they are cylindrical without a bra, wear a bra.
- the greasy low ponytail. Dry shampoo or a shower, it's not hard.
- baseball cap worn with a ponytail without pulling the ponytail through the hole in the back.
- too tight clothes that you are constantly pulling over your belly to adjust. You gained weight? So what, please
Just go buy a pair of pants that fit properly. It's okay, reAlly.
- drop earrings that are clearly homemade or bought At a farmers market.
- one cool or edgy item (it's usually a handbag) that is clearly borrowed or a gift because it's the only nice part of your outfit. Or the only part of your outfit that isn't hideous. If your parents or sister want to give you a freebee from Nordstrom, but a good bra, not a cool handbag, it doesn't pull your look together, it makes all your other clothes look like the shit they are.
- women with size 11 feet wearing open toed shoes. If your toes are the length of my fingers, please don't parade them around
- VPL. Again, it's okay to gain weight. But if you do, buy new undies.

Flame away, but women of DC, you have options in life. Never, ever, choose loose fit capris.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stupid thread. Frumpy is not usually associated with insecure.

+1. I'm not in favor of people going out in public in their workout gear unless they are working out, but those would be frumps. Insecure people would be the women carrying handbags with logos on them, Tory Burch shoes, crazy amounts of makeup, and an unfriendly demeanor.

You must not live close-in.

There are 4 Pilates studios, an orangetheory, revolve spinning, 4 yoga studios, two major gym chains, cross fit, a rowing boutique gym...all within a 4 block radius of my house. Everyone is walking around in workout gear. Usually--you pop into Whole Foods, Traders or South block juice shop after a workout.

If you workout everyday--it's common. We are very active and take kids to parks and fields and it would be idiotic to shower and dress up as opposed to going there in active wear. Sidelines of kids sporting events also have lots of gym/active wear.

I WAH so it saves time to save my shower for end of day. If I WOH -yea wouldn't stay in gym gear. No plans to impress some SAH yentas...

Rather keep a tight, fit body than worry about somebody catching me in workout gear.

I live right in Dupont. I workout. I get dressed in my workout clothes, go workout, and then, get this: go home and shower because it's gross not to. It's not idiotic to get dressed like a normal person when you leave the house (pants, shirts, casual is fine, doesn't have to be business dress). I do it every day. I refuse to be a slob. Just because you overpaid for your tights doesn't mean they aren't pajamas/workout clothes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Frump:
Never works out
Bad eating habits + poor skin care
No color, haircut
Sweatpants, yoga pants with XL tshirt
Sneakers, sandals with no pedicure
House is never clean

Insecure:
High heels everywhere
Clothes too tight
Botox, fake boobs etc.
Check ins on FB to fancy places
Bragging on social media

I have no dog in this fight (or any fight; I think dog fighting is abhorrent) but my husband has informed me many times that lots of men think that sweatpants and yoga pants are basically the sexiest things a woman could ever put on.

I don't know if he's right. I don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

Meh, DH tells me they look like slobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:God bless them, life is hard, but DC is so full of this stuff I have to comment:

- brown, so much brown. You think it all matches itself, but it doesn't.
- backpacks.... There is never, ever an excuse for a grown woman to wear a backpack. Ever. I would literally prefer if you used a target bag as a handbag.
- merrills
- big droopy breasts. If they are cylindrical without a bra, wear a bra.
- the greasy low ponytail. Dry shampoo or a shower, it's not hard.
- baseball cap worn with a ponytail without pulling the ponytail through the hole in the back.
- too tight clothes that you are constantly pulling over your belly to adjust. You gained weight? So what, please
Just go buy a pair of pants that fit properly. It's okay, reAlly.
- drop earrings that are clearly homemade or bought At a farmers market.
- one cool or edgy item (it's usually a handbag) that is clearly borrowed or a gift because it's the only nice part of your outfit. Or the only part of your outfit that isn't hideous. If your parents or sister want to give you a freebee from Nordstrom, but a good bra, not a cool handbag, it doesn't pull your look together, it makes all your other clothes look like the shit they are.
- women with size 11 feet wearing open toed shoes. If your toes are the length of my fingers, please don't parade them around
- VPL. Again, it's okay to gain weight. But if you do, buy new undies.

Flame away, but women of DC, you have options in life. Never, ever, choose loose fit capris.

You are spot on! Thank you for making me laugh and I it was good for me to hear I need to get rid of the ponytail(only wear it sometimes). Thank goodness I don't wear size 11 shoes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:God bless them, life is hard, but DC is so full of this stuff I have to comment:

- brown, so much brown. You think it all matches itself, but it doesn't.
- backpacks.... There is never, ever an excuse for a grown woman to wear a backpack. Ever. I would literally prefer if you used a target bag as a handbag.
- merrills
- big droopy breasts. If they are cylindrical without a bra, wear a bra.
- the greasy low ponytail. Dry shampoo or a shower, it's not hard.
- baseball cap worn with a ponytail without pulling the ponytail through the hole in the back.
- too tight clothes that you are constantly pulling over your belly to adjust. You gained weight? So what, please
Just go buy a pair of pants that fit properly. It's okay, reAlly.
- drop earrings that are clearly homemade or bought At a farmers market.
- one cool or edgy item (it's usually a handbag) that is clearly borrowed or a gift because it's the only nice part of your outfit. Or the only part of your outfit that isn't hideous. If your parents or sister want to give you a freebee from Nordstrom, but a good bra, not a cool handbag, it doesn't pull your look together, it makes all your other clothes look like the shit they are.
- women with size 11 feet wearing open toed shoes. If your toes are the length of my fingers, please don't parade them around
- VPL. Again, it's okay to gain weight. But if you do, buy new undies.

Flame away, but women of DC, you have options in life. Never, ever, choose loose fit capris.

I'm a Kindergarten teacher who takes Metro to work. I'm a grown woman. I'm gonna use a backpack. Get over it. In fact, get over yourself completely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stupid thread. Frumpy is not usually associated with insecure.

+1. I'm not in favor of people going out in public in their workout gear unless they are working out, but those would be frumps. Insecure people would be the women carrying handbags with logos on them, Tory Burch shoes, crazy amounts of makeup, and an unfriendly demeanor.

You must not live close-in.

There are 4 Pilates studios, an orangetheory, revolve spinning, 4 yoga studios, two major gym chains, cross fit, a rowing boutique gym...all within a 4 block radius of my house. Everyone is walking around in workout gear. Usually--you pop into Whole Foods, Traders or South block juice shop after a workout.

If you workout everyday--it's common. We are very active and take kids to parks and fields and it would be idiotic to shower and dress up as opposed to going there in active wear. Sidelines of kids sporting events also have lots of gym/active wear.

I WAH so it saves time to save my shower for end of day. If I WOH -yea wouldn't stay in gym gear. No plans to impress some SAH yentas...

Rather keep a tight, fit body than worry about somebody catching me in workout gear.

I live right in Dupont. I workout. I get dressed in my workout clothes, go workout, and then, get this: go home and shower because it's gross not to. It's not idiotic to get dressed like a normal person when you leave the house (pants, shirts, casual is fine, doesn't have to be business dress). I do it every day. I refuse to be a slob. Just because you overpaid for your tights doesn't mean they aren't pajamas/workout clothes.

+1 if I'm not going to shower at home I shower at the gym. Spending the day in workout clothes after working out is foul.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wearing too baggy or too tight or fraying old clothes, danskos, hair pulled back so tight you worry her head will fall off, roots, overall bad hair, skin and nail care. Helicoptering parenting and an anxious personality. These women scream... I've lost myself.

I'm an rn, I wear my dansko so 40 hours a week. Not an insecure frump

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stupid thread. Frumpy is not usually associated with insecure.

+1. I'm not in favor of people going out in public in their workout gear unless they are working out, but those would be frumps. Insecure people would be the women carrying handbags with logos on them, Tory Burch shoes, crazy amounts of makeup, and an unfriendly demeanor.

You must not live close-in.

There are 4 Pilates studios, an orangetheory, revolve spinning, 4 yoga studios, two major gym chains, cross fit, a rowing boutique gym...all within a 4 block radius of my house. Everyone is walking around in workout gear. Usually--you pop into Whole Foods, Traders or South block juice shop after a workout.

If you workout everyday--it's common. We are very active and take kids to parks and fields and it would be idiotic to shower and dress up as opposed to going there in active wear. Sidelines of kids sporting events also have lots of gym/active wear.

I WAH so it saves time to save my shower for end of day. If I WOH -yea wouldn't stay in gym gear. No plans to impress some SAH yentas...

Rather keep a tight, fit body than worry about somebody catching me in workout gear.

I live right in Dupont. I workout. I get dressed in my workout clothes, go workout, and then, get this: go home and shower because it's gross not to. It's not idiotic to get dressed like a normal person when you leave the house (pants, shirts, casual is fine, doesn't have to be business dress). I do it every day. I refuse to be a slob. Just because you overpaid for your tights doesn't mean they aren't pajamas/workout clothes.

+1 if I'm not going to shower at home I shower at the gym. Spending the day in workout clothes after working out is foul.

I always wonder about this too. I swim at Wilson pool and workout at home, so I never wear "athleisure" outside of the home. Are all these women I see at Whole Foods with their sweaty hair and workout clothes on all rank and stinky? Are they gonna stay that way all day? Or are they just "rocking" that look and just happen to have sweaty hair?

[Anonymous]

Well these styles don't necessarily mean your a "frump," but are very difficult for any but the beautiful people to pull off without looking a tad matronly:

- short-sleeve button up shirts (I think only ll bean makes these anymore so we are all probably safe)
- yes, mid calf straight or relaxed capris (not all cropped/ankle length pants)
- trend alert: the wide legged, slightly short ("summer length") pants that are everywhere now. Impossible for all over BMI 18.
- wild ethnic prints (if they are Chicos, not your actual heritage)
- big baggy fisherman sweaters (I like this in theory, but again, only look great on a J Crew model, but not on anyone else)
- Mid-length skirts (Again, like in theory, but in reality...)

These do not look frumpy:http://shop.nordstrom.com/c/womens-collared-button-up-tops

[Anonymous]

^^ You are proving the PP's point. 99% of these are long-sleeves or sleeveless. And the few actual short-sleeve ones are going to make the normal gal look like, yes, a frump: e.g., http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/the-fifth-label-born-free-shirt/4410702?origin=category-personalizedsort&fashioncolor=BLACK or, yikes, http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/madewell-courier-check-cotton-shirt/4430032?origin=category-personalizedsort&fashioncolor=HEATHER%20PELICAN

[Anonymous]

i'm going with any mom who wears too many diamonds during the day - that screams insecurity