What's the best insult you've ever heard?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"I wish that for just one time you could stand inside my shoes. You'd know what a drag it is to see you"

this song is so brutally honest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kind of an insult. Giving a wedding speech, "it's always a pleasure to come to one of John's weddings."

I laughed out
Loud.

At another wedding:

"I didn't know they served crab cakes at shotgun weddings."

Bride was 3 months pregnant.

[Anonymous]

“I did not know you were American, agter all, you were called a Fatso for eating McDonalds everyday after school”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“I did not know you were American, agter all, you were called a Fatso for eating McDonalds everyday after school”

after*

[Anonymous]

If you were my husband, I would serve you poison…if I were you husband I would gratefully drink it…

[Anonymous]

I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yo, Mama's so fat she sat on a rainbow and Skittles popped out.

Middle school level funny 😄

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Senator Kennedy has the best insults:
"she's the reason there are instructions on shampoo bottles" and "I'm not saying he's the dumbest person in the world, but he better hope the dumbest person doesn't die" are 2 of my favorites.

The second one really made me laugh. I’m stealing it!

[Anonymous]

Sun can be forgiven, stupidity is forever.

It's Chanel but I've always loved that quote - a backhanded observational insult

[Anonymous]

Sin can be forgiven, stupidity is forever ^

[Anonymous]

An elderly Kate Hepburn turned around in an elevator and asked a disheveled woman who had just rushed in -
"My dear, who does your hair?"

[Anonymous]

Two favorites

1) at any point when those words were coming out for your mouth did you think they sounded like a satisfying explanation.

2) I will use every ounce of my energy and every resource available at my disposal to destroy your life so comprehensively, so absolutely that your name will become a byword for boy he really shouldn’t have f*cked with her.

[Anonymous]

Tommy: Does this suit make me look fat?
Richard: No, your face does.

[Anonymous]

"He's all hat and no cattle"

[Anonymous]

Winston Churchill was the GOAT of great insults:

Bessie: “Winston, you are drunk.“
Winston: “My dear, you are ugly, but tomorrow I shall be sober and you will still be ugly.“

U.S. President Harry S. Truman once defended Churchill’s replacement, Clement Attlee, by saying “He seems a modest sort of fellow.“

To which, Churchill replied “He’s got a lot to be modest about.“

Complaining about former Prime Minister Ramsay MacDonald’s lack of gusto, Churchill said:

“I remember when I was a child, being taken to the celebrated Barnum’s Circus, which contained an exhibition of freaks and monstrosities, but the exhibit on the programme which I most desired to see was the one described as “The Boneless Wonder”. My parents judged that the spectacle would be too demoralising and revolting for my youthful eye and I have waited fifty years, to see the The Boneless Wonder sitting on the Treasury Bench.“