Husband Brought Bud light to Fancy Christmas Party

[Anonymous]

Why is hostess hounding you instead of her husband? Because she tried the fight with her husband and it didn't go her way.

Your DH's allegiance to them to through the husband.

This is "blame your husband's affair partner's spouse" level of misdirected rage.

Express sympathy for the disruption, but it's out of your hands. Your DH conspired with the host husband. Tell hostess that she's welcome to arrange a conversation with the two men, and you'll encourage your DH to attend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your DH and the hostess were both wrong. You don’t take your own food and drink someone else’s event when it’s not a potluck. The hostess should have ignored the crass behavior and quietly removed you and the other friend from the invite list going forward if she’s that put out. However a gracious hostess would just have Bud in bottles at the bar next year and let you know in advance to leave the cooler at home.

Last sentence. Oh hell no!

[Anonymous]

Yes, he was out of line. He's an adult - he's old enough to be able to find something to drink at someone else's party without needing to bring his special foods from home. Your husband is a word that rhymes with the word click but starts with a D.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Congratulations! You and jerk husband will not be invited to future parties. He can laugh that off in his man cave.

Win-Win. Doubt DH wanted to be there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
The hostess is way more out of line than your husband, OP.

I say this as a super uptight, upper middle class sort of person, who would never want to see a beer at such an event.

The role of the host is to make guests feel welcome. If there is a guest who breaks a social rule and brings unwanted food or drink for his own consumption, it's the host's duty to make reasonable accommodations. Yes, the beer added a vulgar note to an otherwise elegant event. But the accommodation was easy to make, and the host should have smiled and thought of it as an "eccentricity" on the part of one of the guests.

Because the upper classes are never crass peasants with low tastes. They're just eccentric

The fact that the hostess became upset and is now hounding you is beyond the pale, and shows how insecure she is about her social position. No REAL upper class person, or gracious host, would let this bother them.

The correct course of action is to reply by mail on your monogrammed cardstock, expressing your regret that she is upset. It's not an apology. It's an empathetic acknowledgement of her fragility.

+1. Hostess is ridiculous.

DH and friend sort of funny. OP you are not going to make your dh feel bad because he just does not care. He know the host on a whole other level. So just let it go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If this story is real
1) Your DH and childhood friend are hysterical. They did it to thumb their nose at the fru-fru gathering bc they know that
2) The hostess has a pole up her ass and would lose her sh**
3) The host(old childhood friend) doesn’t give a F**k (I notice you don’t mention him at all) because before the money, they played in ballparks and climbed fences together
4)You need to take the pole out of your own ass, this is about childhood buddies and antics, it’s not about you. You’ll still be invited next year don’t worry your pretty head OP.

DH has arrived.

[Anonymous]

Don't worry, his friend will divorce within five years. NBD. Ignore

[Anonymous]

This didn’t happen. There’s no way the hostess would care this much. Whats up with these farcical threads? You must think we’re idiots.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I was the hostess, I would have produced a massive jug of puffed cheese balls and had one of the catering staff stand beside the cooler offering them to the beer drinkers.

Don't threaten me with a good time!

[Anonymous]

He was rude, obviously, but this isn't your problem to fix. If his friend is upset that's between the two of them. There's no evidence that his friend is actually upset, though. The way you phrased it "wife of the guy" makes me think she might be wife #2 or 3 and you'll be invited back next year anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This didn’t happen. There’s no way the hostess would care this much. Whats up with these farcical threads? You must think we’re idiots.

This story is fake. The facts are too out of the norm. I operate two catering companies. We have never - ever - catered an event and only served one beer. It doesn't happen because the host and catering company knows guests have various tastes and it's common practice to serve at the minimum one light beer if not 2-3 options. It's even common these days to serve nonalcoholic beer. We've received many requests for nonalcoholic beer in the last two years. These are mainly for corporate and business events.

No one is hosting a massive party and only serving Stella. That does not occur. Been in the catering business for over 15 years in DC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My response to this depends entirely on whether the actual host was offended. If the person who is your husband's long-time friend, and the person who earned the money to make this lifestyle happens, is actually offended, then I'd offer an apology.

But it sounds like maybe the old friend found it funny, or at least tolerable, and his wife is inflexible.

This is wrong on many levels.

His old friend's wife is the hostess of he party, it's at her house, and she's got just as much right to take offense as her husband. Also, I'll have to pass along to my wife that because I make about 5x more than she does, she doesn't get to take offense to things people do in our house (or do you think it's actually my house?). I'll let you know how she feels about that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
The hostess is way more out of line than your husband, OP.

I say this as a super uptight, upper middle class sort of person, who would never want to see a beer at such an event.

The role of the host is to make guests feel welcome. If there is a guest who breaks a social rule and brings unwanted food or drink for his own consumption, it's the host's duty to make reasonable accommodations. Yes, the beer added a vulgar note to an otherwise elegant event. But the accommodation was easy to make, and the host should have smiled and thought of it as an "eccentricity" on the part of one of the guests.

Because the upper classes are never crass peasants with low tastes. They're just eccentric

The fact that the hostess became upset and is now hounding you is beyond the pale, and shows how insecure she is about her social position. No REAL upper class person, or gracious host, would let this bother them.

The correct course of action is to reply by mail on your monogrammed cardstock, expressing your regret that she is upset. It's not an apology. It's an empathetic acknowledgement of her fragility.

+1

I can't help but think of that episode of The Office where Michael brings gross potato salad to a fancy catered party. What does the host do? Gives him a fake smile and plops it down on the table along with the fancy stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This didn’t happen. There’s no way the hostess would care this much. Whats up with these farcical threads? You must think we’re idiots.

This story is fake. The facts are too out of the norm. I operate two catering companies. We have never - ever - catered an event and only served one beer. It doesn't happen because the host and catering company knows guests have various tastes and it's common practice to serve at the minimum one light beer if not 2-3 options. It's even common these days to serve nonalcoholic beer. We've received many requests for nonalcoholic beer in the last two years. These are mainly for corporate and business events.

No one is hosting a massive party and only serving Stella. That does not occur. Been in the catering business for over 15 years in DC.

Give us the scoop. Who is serving Bud and Bud Light?

[Anonymous]

It sounds like both men made terrible choices when it came to picking wives