Husband never admits he's wrong

[Anonymous]

My spouse is incredibly defensive when criticized (grew up with very critical mother and jeering, taunting father). So I really try to take a non critical approach but also DH and i worked on our communication. He often 'hears' criticism when its not intended, so I'm careful about how I put things and he is better about not reacting immediately. The other key is that I try to be posiive and supportive whenever I can, just fosters better communication and goodwill.

also, unless its really important, most stuff is not worth mentioning.

[Anonymous]

My spouse is also very defensive at even reminders or questions or requests. But he was Mr Straight As and told for decades how amazing he is. So he cannot handle being asked to lock the front door or not slam cabinets; he flies off the handle and tells you off in a petty order. And doesn’t apologize for the first offense or from doubling down into a-hole mode.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, there's generally too much chatter. You would all benefit from more autonomy -- including your daughter brushing her own hair. Here is how it should have gone down: Daddy hurts when he brushes her hair. She brushes it herself.

Op, generally: couples do not need to fight. People do not need to admit short comings. People aren't "wrong" to the point of needing to apologize. Your examples do not indicate that he his hurting you. Instead, he is sarcastic. It's another form of an eyeroll. It's not respectful and is a slippery slope but frankly it sounds like you nag too much or just generally nit pick.

OMG you sound like a nutjob.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your DH sounds like a narcissist. It's unlikely there's anything you can do to help him have empathy. If there's a chance that he'll consider any help, then he's more likely to listen to someone else instead of you. I understand that can be hurtful to you that he won't listen to you, but that's kind of how narcissists work. Maybe you should consider marriage counseling to work on your communication.

Wow, first response out and you got it right! I am so impressed. The quality of DCUM posters just went up one point.
This is a shitty situation because npd people do not change. I doubt counseling will help because he will just lie and gaslight the counselor.