Where should we send our VERY BRIGHT kid with social-emotional concerns?

[Anonymous]

Our kid's the 'quirky' kid (age 6), for whom ASD has been ruled out. His peer to peer social skills are behind (tolerates kids, plays w/them when they initiate it--but does not initiate) and he has some ADD traits. (Not at all hyper, but impulsive and inattentive) He just doesn't 'go with the flow' of the group (example--teacher tells kids to line up. He's the last to line up, and only does so after teacher calls his name) On the other hand, he is light years ahead of peers in academics. Any school suggestions in MD or DC? We have tried the county, and they let us down.

[Anonymous]

Perhaps the Diener School in Potomac?

[Anonymous]

I say Maddux maybe, or even McLean. PP, when we visited Diener School, the kids appeared much more needier than OP's kid sounds. (And OP's kid sounds A LOT like mine) The Diener school's mission didn't seem to focus on working with very bright/gifted kids who have a few issues. The kids I met definitely had loads of cognitive concerns--and behavioral.

[Anonymous]

I think that Maddux would be a good fit cognitively, but I think that your kiddo is maybe too old. They are adding a first grade this year and probably a second grade the following year. Even if your kiddo was 5, I'm wondering if thier "whipping the kids into shape" approach might not clash with your kid. The kids at Diener have fairly significant problems.

I'd second the suggestion to look at McLean, they have some very bright kids, have small enough classes to customize instruction somewhat, and seem to have a real focus on building community and self esteem.

Have you gotten advice about the inattentive ADD issue? Perhaps coaching or even medication might help him to be more successful?

Did you consider any GT programs in MC? Didn't they use to have a GTLD program? I've heard that Kingsbury has a GTLD program developed by the same team as MC, not sure what year it starts, maybe second grade? Might be worth a look as well. I've read that many extremely bright kids can seem a bit immature emotionally and socially, that takes a while for those areas to catch up. Of course you want to do what you can in the meantime.

Suzie Blattner at ITS for Children and Families is a great consultant for MC and also for DC. She seems to be the "go to" consultant for parents of quirky kids.

[Anonymous]

My DS sounds exactly like this too. He's not special needs, very bright and can be quirky. I was advised by a psych to immerse him in playdates. Eventually he'll catch up then.

[Anonymous]

OP, has your child been evaluated by an OT for sensory-processing issues? He sounds a lot like my DD - who is bright, but best described as a child who marches to the beat of a different kettle of fish. DD (who is 4.5) started seeing an OT in Georgetown last fall and gets OT at her pre-school as well. I have noticed some major decreases in her "quirks." It's not that I want to stamp out her uniqueness or that I view her differences as necessarily bad, but I do think it's worthwhile to address anything that could impact either her ability to engage academically or her ability to develop age-appropriate friendships. Like your child, she is not ASD (in fact, that was never on the table) but she is "quirky" much as you described and addressing this via OT is making a positive difference for her.

Just a thought. Best of luck to you.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like my child, who is mildly ADD in addition to just plain quirky! Have you considered one of the progressive schools like Green Acres or Burgundy Farm? These schools provide good social support for children who are unique individuals while also providing strong academics. My other comment is to embrace your child's quirkiness ... OT, proper school environment, and even ADD meds all can help but thankfully will not eliminate the differences! Such traits can make for a slightly more difficult childhood at times, but certainly no less valuable or lovable person!