Do men really not care about a woman’s career?

[Anonymous]

Men care but will not date someone they would otherwise find unattractive just because her career is on point. The opposite isn't always true.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Combined HHI is around $700k. My husband isn’t going to live a $450K lifestyle just for the privilege of “not caring” about my career. Adequate HHI means outsourcing a lot of the points of tension in a dual-income relationship.

Sure..but your husband isn't high income..enough. Most couples fall in the middle and need dual incoms to live a "$700 K lifestyle". In that case, a woman's career matters. If your DH made 700K by himself this wouldn't matter.

Unless he or the family wanted to live a $950K lifestyle. It’s all about how people want to live. Even in DC there are people who make it work on $450k if that’s how they want to live.

Sure there’s lifestyle creep, but at a certain point if a family is comfortable priorities switch to other things rather than money. Private school is going to be a stretch still at $450k for two kids unless you want to cut back on other umc luxuries like travel.

Which still concludes that at the top 2% by income for the country, men care about women's careers.

Sorry you didn't marry rich enough.

Only a poor dumb idiot would think that. We're both trust funders, we both make a lot of money and there's never enough money. More money is ALWAYS better. If you're happy with your plywood cabinets and can't tell the difference between a $40 print and great original art, of course crumbs are fine enough for you. This is always the case with people who grew up poor or low income; their view of a what it means to have a good life is very limited.

You have deeper psychological problems than worrying about who successful men want to marry when you lose sight of other priorities that a good life consist of such as health, mental well being, and happiness with your family. So your motto is keep working till you drop for that one more dollar? That’s a sad life.

I have a great life and a cushy job as a non supervisory gs15-like for a financial regulator, with liberal telework. Do you also understand the absurdity of your thought process? My career is not impacting my health or my family's happiness. I'm not working on an oil rig. I can also get cancer working or staying at home.

[Anonymous]

I'm not smart enough or wealthy enough to NOT care about my wife's career. Decades ago I married someone who is nice and can hold down a decent job while never making a lot of money (<$100k). She did the same, as it turns out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another elephant in the room: George Clooney married a woman 16 years younger than him. Not exactly age appropriate in this dcum gender egalitarian utopia is it.

I heard they were getting divorced?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:At this point, she is more of a billionaire socialite from what I see in on my newsfeed.

Still found time to have cases before the UN last year but cool, he “doesn’t care” about her career. That’s why he brags about it. That’s why he didn’t marry all of the actresses he dated.

It’s similar to marrying someone from Harvard and then her scaling way back or becoming a SAHM. That’s a social status marker. Again, it doesn’t matter what the woman does after marriage. In the past the woman’s family was a marker of good social status, now it’s education and prior experience. What comes after is negligible. Amal Clooney is not working 100 hour weeks like every other law partner out there.

She doesn’t work 100 hours is not the same as her husband doesn’t care what she does. He married her in no small part because of what she does.

What the woman does before marriage and after marriage is wildly different. It has been explained over and over again in this thread.

And after her marriage, Amal Clooney continued to practice law and George Clooney both bragged about it endlessly and wrote about how important her job still was as part of his suit against them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another elephant in the room: George Clooney married a woman 16 years younger than him. Not exactly age appropriate in this dcum gender egalitarian utopia is it.

I heard they were getting divorced?

Not a chance. He has political aspirations and she has an amazing pedigree.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:At this point, she is more of a billionaire socialite from what I see in on my newsfeed.

Still found time to have cases before the UN last year but cool, he “doesn’t care” about her career. That’s why he brags about it. That’s why he didn’t marry all of the actresses he dated.

It’s similar to marrying someone from Harvard and then her scaling way back or becoming a SAHM. That’s a social status marker. Again, it doesn’t matter what the woman does after marriage. In the past the woman’s family was a marker of good social status, now it’s education and prior experience. What comes after is negligible. Amal Clooney is not working 100 hour weeks like every other law partner out there.

She doesn’t work 100 hours is not the same as her husband doesn’t care what she does. He married her in no small part because of what she does.

What the woman does before marriage and after marriage is wildly different. It has been explained over and over again in this thread.

And after her marriage, Amal Clooney continued to practice law and George Clooney both bragged about it endlessly and wrote about how important her job still was as part of his suit against them.

I read an interview and she was refreshingly honest about her high visibility job. Clooney is the hands-on parent and she admitted that she doesn't see her kids everyday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not smart enough or wealthy enough to NOT care about my wife's career. Decades ago I married someone who is nice and can hold down a decent job while never making a lot of money (<$100k). She did the same, as it turns out.

You’re funny and nice though.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I'm not smart enough or wealthy enough to NOT care about my wife's career. Decades ago I married someone who is nice and can hold down a decent job while never making a lot of money (<$100k). She did the same, as it turns out.

You’re funny and nice though.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Men care but will not date someone they would otherwise find unattractive just because her career is on point. The opposite isn't always true.

This. End thread.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:At this point, she is more of a billionaire socialite from what I see in on my newsfeed.

Still found time to have cases before the UN last year but cool, he “doesn’t care” about her career. That’s why he brags about it. That’s why he didn’t marry all of the actresses he dated.

It’s similar to marrying someone from Harvard and then her scaling way back or becoming a SAHM. That’s a social status marker. Again, it doesn’t matter what the woman does after marriage. In the past the woman’s family was a marker of good social status, now it’s education and prior experience. What comes after is negligible. Amal Clooney is not working 100 hour weeks like every other law partner out there.

She doesn’t work 100 hours is not the same as her husband doesn’t care what she does. He married her in no small part because of what she does.

What the woman does before marriage and after marriage is wildly different. It has been explained over and over again in this thread.

And after her marriage, Amal Clooney continued to practice law and George Clooney both bragged about it endlessly and wrote about how important her job still was as part of his suit against them.

I read an interview and she was refreshingly honest about her high visibility job. Clooney is the hands-on parent and she admitted that she doesn't see her kids everyday.

Sure. Unless she is under oath and has 12 people testifying that she is working, I do not believe it. If she does not see the kids it because she is was at a great party or shopping.

[Anonymous]

Regardless how "most men" value a woman's looks vs. her career, to me who cares what "most men" think or do anyway? I know that for me, I'd never have any interest in dating anyone who had zero interest or value on what my interests were. Careers can either be because it's the job I make my paycheck in but I don't love it, OR it could be my chosen career because I love my job or at least find it interesting.

So while I would want anyone I date to be interested in my job and what I do, it's more important to me that overall they be interested in what my interests are.

Similarly, I don't only care about what a guy does for work or only care about what he looks like, I care about the whole package: is he interesting? Smart? Funny? Kind? Hot? What does he do for work, and why does he do it?

So the whole original question doesn't work for me, because even if "most men" don't care about a woman's career, any guy I'm gonna date seriously has to care what I do and why I do it. What does conversation look like with a guy who's got zero interest in what you do all day? I know what it looks like, I've met a few of those guys, and that was the last conversation we had most likely if it was all about them and only either what I look like or what I want to do with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:At this point, she is more of a billionaire socialite from what I see in on my newsfeed.

Still found time to have cases before the UN last year but cool, he “doesn’t care” about her career. That’s why he brags about it. That’s why he didn’t marry all of the actresses he dated.

It’s similar to marrying someone from Harvard and then her scaling way back or becoming a SAHM. That’s a social status marker. Again, it doesn’t matter what the woman does after marriage. In the past the woman’s family was a marker of good social status, now it’s education and prior experience. What comes after is negligible. Amal Clooney is not working 100 hour weeks like every other law partner out there.

She doesn’t work 100 hours is not the same as her husband doesn’t care what she does. He married her in no small part because of what she does.

What the woman does before marriage and after marriage is wildly different. It has been explained over and over again in this thread.

And after her marriage, Amal Clooney continued to practice law and George Clooney both bragged about it endlessly and wrote about how important her job still was as part of his suit against them.

I read an interview and she was refreshingly honest about her high visibility job. Clooney is the hands-on parent and she admitted that she doesn't see her kids everyday.

Sure. Unless she is under oath and has 12 people testifying that she is working, I do not believe it. If she does not see the kids it because she is was at a great party or shopping.

God, you are so uneducated. She's a visiting faculty at Columbia Law and she has worked on really high visibility cases and she was published a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At this point, she is more of a billionaire socialite from what I see in on my newsfeed.

Still found time to have cases before the UN last year but cool, he “doesn’t care” about her career. That’s why he brags about it. That’s why he didn’t marry all of the actresses he dated.

It’s similar to marrying someone from Harvard and then her scaling way back or becoming a SAHM. That’s a social status marker. Again, it doesn’t matter what the woman does after marriage. In the past the woman’s family was a marker of good social status, now it’s education and prior experience. What comes after is negligible. Amal Clooney is not working 100 hour weeks like every other law partner out there.

She doesn’t work 100 hours is not the same as her husband doesn’t care what she does. He married her in no small part because of what she does.

What the woman does before marriage and after marriage is wildly different. It has been explained over and over again in this thread.

And after her marriage, Amal Clooney continued to practice law and George Clooney both bragged about it endlessly and wrote about how important her job still was as part of his suit against them.

I read an interview and she was refreshingly honest about her high visibility job. Clooney is the hands-on parent and she admitted that she doesn't see her kids everyday.

Sure. Unless she is under oath and has 12 people testifying that she is working, I do not believe it. If she does not see the kids it because she is was at a great party or shopping.

NP: Whatever PP. You don't believe it, but you offer ZERO evidence that she is NOT working hard, and you also have ZERO evidence she's out partying and shopping instead of seeing her kids. SO... who cares if you believe her or not? All signs point to Clooney cares and you can't invalidate that with your "opinion".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH didn’t want the dynamic of a SAHM being dependent on him and looked for someone who would significantly contribute to household finances. Importantly, he has always been willing to put in the work at home to help make that happen. I have never packed a school lunch or had to keep track of any bills. We both make a lot but I’m on track to surpass him in the next few years and then he wants to retire and be a full time SAHD lol.

This was my dream. But I married the wrong guy for it. He's kind, but on the spectrum and not one to be aware of anyone else's needs. Sounds like you've got a good setup!