Why are some parents so cold and unfriendly?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All the yapping outcasts in this thread ought to make a group chat and leave the rest of us alone.

No crabs reference?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just don't get it. This post is not about wanting people to invite me or my kids places (truly unnecessary, not the point) or wanting other people's kids to be friends with my kids. I'm not trying to force anyone to do anything.

But so often when I'm at school events or activities, and forced into situation with other parents, I will turn to the person next to me and just introduce myself, ask about their kid, whatever, and they are so antisocial. Like one word answers, look uncomfortable or annoyed. I will read the room and drop it or move away, but I think it's weird. Even if I'm had a stressful day at work or am just in a bad mood, I will smile and be pleasant in those situations because, hey, we're all in the same boat to some degree and I just think being pleasant to fellow parents is part of the gig. I also just find it useful to be able to put parent faces/names with their kids, and to get to know the other families enough to be cordial during pick up/drop off or whatever.

If this is you, why can't you just be pleasant for a few moments? Why the cold shoulder?

Yes. I have seen this too. I thought this was just American culture.

America is a huge country and there is no one culture. I was in a small town in PA recently and was looking at some chocolate muffins in the grocery store. A random woman said, "These are a great price." I said, "Yeah, and they look really good." She said, "I always buy extra when they go on sale and put them in my freezer." I said, "I'm from out of town so I can't do that, but good for you." Then we said goodbye and went on our way. If I had said "These are a great price" to a stranger in the grocery store in the dc area, they would have acted like they hadn't heard me and then just moved away.

I very rarely have moments like this in the grocery store but they are pleasant little interactions when they happen.

I have had interactions like that in the DC area but it's rare for it to happen with a fellow UMC white woman. When I have those exchanges, they are almost always with black people here.

Yesterday I was walking my daughter home from school and a woman walking by saw her uniform (public school) and stopped and asked if we were at XYZ school. I said yes and she said that was where her child went, and we had this nice, short conversation about the school and the neighborhood. I walked away just feeling pleasant and connected to my community. But this only happens with black people here. On average, the white people are much less friendly. And I'm white. I try not to contribute to the problem, I don't really get why it's like this.

It’s like this in many NE cities/suburbs. These are entitled, insufferable, socially immature, stunted, main characters. Why are they this way? Well, chances are they were raised by the same. This is what happens when narrow minded aholes procreate. They are perpetual whiny little entitled brats who feel they can control everything and everyone around them. You are invading their space, raping their ears by uttering a benign pleasantry. Don’t accommodate these dorks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I think there must be a troll here that is rage baiting people. At least I really hope that there isn’t a real person who is that weird.

People in this area are definitely the least friendly people I have ever been around. When I first moved here, I made a mistake of trying to make small talk at the grocery store because it was so normal to do that where I had lived previously. After a couple of weird looks, I stopped. It makes me sad. It’s easy to get sucked into being judgmental and mean around here because that is the culture.

It is really awkward to be around the same parents frequently and some of them act like they have never met you. Not everyone is like this, but there’s enough of it to create an unfriendly vibe in so many settings. Now that I think about it, some of the coldest people I have met here are white women who grew up in the area.

It is much of the NE region. It’s really sad. I remember the way my grandparents knew their neighbors, helped their neighbors, and even if they didn’t know someone well they were cordial and accepting. This all changed when everything became a ruthless rat race. It’s definitely generational. Everyone is now clawing for the proverbial first prize. What a waste of life, such a vapid shallow existence these individuals lead. They don’t know any different though, so this is normal to them and we’re the anomalies. They were likely raised by raging narcissists and never learned basic social skills.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I ask about people's jobs because sometimes they're interesting? I'm not likely to ask many questions to most lawyers (no offense, I am one myself), but if you're like a cartographer or an arborist or something? That's cool! I want to hear about that.

I bet you don’t carry on extended conversations with custodians.

Sorry to burst your bubble but I really don’t want to know you. The reason I make small talk is because I was raised and trained to be welcoming and make others feel comfortable. I really don’t want to know someone like you, but unlike people like you, it’s against my nature to ignore and shun people. I was expected at an early age to learn how to communicate with others and learn manners, which included how to exchange pleasantries. We were raised differently obviously. And again, I have absolutely no interest in becoming your acquaintance or friend whatsoever.