Birth Control After Infertility (Posting here for TTC sensitivities)

[Anonymous]

Posted here intentionally to not cause angst in the TTC infertile world, but are you on birth control after infertility?

I'm a confirmed case of... nothing (ie unexplained), but tried to conceive via timing, etc etc etc for three years before getting pregnant on my second IUI with my first and third IUI with my second.

I'm reticent to go on birth control, but also know we can't afford a third through procedures and daycare timing even though we'd both love one.

I should take birth control... right?

[Anonymous]

In a similar boat except I went the IVF route and now have two kids. We don't want and can't afford a third child. It's crazy that after so many years of trying not to get pregnant (in my 20s), I had difficulty getting pregnant when I wanted to. Now I don't want to get pregnant and doubt I could even though both DH and I look totally normal on paper (unexplained infertility) and somehow I found it to be a really tough decision.

But to answer your question, yes, use birth control if you don't want a third child and/or if a third child would cause undue stress on your family. I eventually opted for Mirena after I weaned DS2. Used the mini pill before then.

[Anonymous]

If you don't want another baby, go on birth control Took me years to conceive DC1, so I figured it would be a major endeavor to try to get pregnant again. But, surprise, a one-time lapse in condom use at a time that I didn't think I was fertile in my cycle anyway (I am not a huge hormonal birth control fan, long story) and now we are expecting #2. We are thrilled, but quite surprised because it was such a huge ordeal to have DC1. It's just the luck of the draw if you get pregnant and, honestly, if I was dead set against another kid, I would have bitten the bullet and taken some other birth control measures. But, between my conviction that pregnancy was unlikely and my desire to someday have #2, I was not as diligent as I would have been if I really didn't want another.

[Anonymous]

I have a friend who had one DC through IVF and then twins through another IVF two years later, several failed IVF's in between, and then a VERY surprising 4th DC conceived naturally 2 years after that. It can happen even if rare, so it makes sense to either be prepared for it or prevent it.

[Anonymous]

I got pregnant with DC#1 on month 2, but had a miscarriage, an ectopic, and almost 2 years of failed attempts before turning to IUI to conceive DC#2. I got an IUD 2 months after DC#2 was born. We knew that we were done at 2 and I figured it would be just my luck to accidentally conceive when we weren't trying after going through all that heartache trying to conceive DC#2. Fertility is a funny beast, sometimes. Best not to mess with it.

[Anonymous]

Well, the fact that you say both you and DH would love a third makes me disagree with the PPs. Chances are very very low, but you might as well let fate have its way here. Intelligent, educated people can *always* figure out the finances and again, it is a very remote possibility anyway that you would conceive. And personally, I would be really reluctant to take bc for my own health reasons which would also steer me toward just letting nature take its course here. My advice would be different if you absolutely did not want (and would not) carry another baby to term. But it sounds like your heart is open to it if another little one were by freak chance to come your way.

[Anonymous]

We won't be using any but then we would love a third, though we are apprehensive about our age (41).

[Anonymous]

I have good friends who adopted their first, conceived their second through IVF. and then had a surprise third. At the time they were planning to start IVF again soon, so while not expected their third was very welcome. The mom told me that it isn't unheard of for a pregnancy to kind of open things up, and make a second pregnancy easier to achieve. Not sure if it's true, but that's what she told me.

[Anonymous]

Now I am. Through many years of NTNP, then actively TTC for two years, I had just one ectopic pregnancy (and was at that point diagnosed with severe endo). My one successful pregnancy resulted from our third IVF attempt. Then, when DS was 10.5 months old, one instance of unprotected sex resulted in another ectopic pregnancy.

That recent ectopic was good, in a way, as it answered the "what if we just tried on our own to have a baby?" question that had plagued me since the first ectopic - when we were told it would be too risky to TTC by anything other than IVF. Clearly, it IS too risky for us, and I'm lucky that the second ectopic was easily resolved (unlike the first, which was a nightmare). Lesson learned, and we'll be using birth control from here on out.

[Anonymous]

In my new moms and breastfeeding center groups, several people ended up with surprise natural pregnancies shortly after giving birth to a baby conceived through ivf. They were each shocked, but then after telling their stories, everyone in the groups seemed to know other people in the same boat.

[Anonymous]

If you got pregnant from an IUI, I'd definitely use BC if you don't want another!
I tried for three years too, but I did finally get pregnant naturally. It can happen.
We are using condoms. I'm still nursing and don't trust the mini pill.

[Anonymous]

Definitely use birth control. I tried unsuccessfully for almost 4 years to get pregnant, including 3 failed IUIs. Finally, at age 40, we decided that it just wasn't meant to be and we gave up. Imagine our total shock the next month when we found out I was pregnant....and we only had sex 1 time the previous month.

[Anonymous]

After my twins were born, my OB emphatically told me "Your infertility days are OVER, so if you don't want more, use protection."

[Anonymous]

You must do something serious for BC or you will end up pregnant.