Why don’t U.S. hospitals let women sleep quietly for the night in the hospital after giving birth?

[Anonymous]

As I think someone else mentioned, “baby friendly” is a designation that helps the hospitals get more funding when they hit certain metrics. I didn’t mind the required rooming in but the worst part for me were the lactation consultants. Honestly, what happens to make these women so obsessed with forcing nursing on other women? One grabbed my chest without permission while shaking this tiny vial she had on a necklace, explaining to me that the vial represented how little liquid baby actually needed. This was, of course, after I asked for formula.

Shockingly, once I finally got the formula, baby was a contented little dream and we happily did combo feeding for the next several months. Every family should be able to pick the right way to feed their baby for them—the “baby friendly” lactation consultants can be downright frightening for new moms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As I think someone else mentioned, “baby friendly” is a designation that helps the hospitals get more funding when they hit certain metrics. I didn’t mind the required rooming in but the worst part for me were the lactation consultants. Honestly, what happens to make these women so obsessed with forcing nursing on other women? One grabbed my chest without permission while shaking this tiny vial she had on a necklace, explaining to me that the vial represented how little liquid baby actually needed. This was, of course, after I asked for formula.

Shockingly, once I finally got the formula, baby was a contented little dream and we happily did combo feeding for the next several months. Every family should be able to pick the right way to feed their baby for them—the “baby friendly” lactation consultants can be downright frightening for new moms.

She actually grabbed your breast?! How awful. I would have reported her to someone in authority. Absolutely outrageous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are there really people who want their babies in the nursery?! The nurse asked me if I wanted the baby in the nursery and I thought she was crazy, why would I let someone take my 45 minute old newborn somewhere else for hours?

This thread is 22 pages long, did you read any of it?!

They are just here martyr trolling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me it wasn’t just the nurses, but the sheer volume of people and none of them coordinate.

-the nurses who do vitals
-the residents
-the actual docs
-the janitor/people emptying trash
-the person who would take my blood (not the same as the nurses)
-the pharmacy people
-the pediatrician
-the people in charge of the paperwork/birth certificate
-the lactation consultant
-I’m probably forgetting a few

It was so horrible. I still cannot fathom why things are set up this way.

-the chaplain
-the photographer
-the cafeteria menu lady

OMG the cafeteria menu lady is so spot on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me it wasn’t just the nurses, but the sheer volume of people and none of them coordinate.

-the nurses who do vitals
-the residents
-the actual docs
-the janitor/people emptying trash
-the person who would take my blood (not the same as the nurses)
-the pharmacy people
-the pediatrician
-the people in charge of the paperwork/birth certificate
-the lactation consultant
-I’m probably forgetting a few

It was so horrible. I still cannot fathom why things are set up this way.

-the chaplain
-the photographer
-the cafeteria menu lady

OMG the cafeteria menu lady is so spot on.

Haha that was the one interruption I appreciated, it only happened during daylight hours and I was so hungry!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As I think someone else mentioned, “baby friendly” is a designation that helps the hospitals get more funding when they hit certain metrics. I didn’t mind the required rooming in but the worst part for me were the lactation consultants. Honestly, what happens to make these women so obsessed with forcing nursing on other women? One grabbed my chest without permission while shaking this tiny vial she had on a necklace, explaining to me that the vial represented how little liquid baby actually needed. This was, of course, after I asked for formula.

Shockingly, once I finally got the formula, baby was a contented little dream and we happily did combo feeding for the next several months. Every family should be able to pick the right way to feed their baby for them—the “baby friendly” lactation consultants can be downright frightening for new moms.

I had the same experience with the lactation consultant physically touching me without permission. We left the hospital less than 24 hours after my daughter was born because I was so uncomfortable. They took her to the nursery that night but told me they wouldn’t do so until after 11pm (she was born 11 hours earlier than that) and gave me a hard time about it. I had to push and then they didn’t show up to take her as promised. I had to keep calling and then when they finally showed they told me that they’d bring her back in whenever she cried. I told them that they should absolutely not do that and to give her formula, and they were absolutely incredulous. It was not a good experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As I think someone else mentioned, “baby friendly” is a designation that helps the hospitals get more funding when they hit certain metrics. I didn’t mind the required rooming in but the worst part for me were the lactation consultants. Honestly, what happens to make these women so obsessed with forcing nursing on other women? One grabbed my chest without permission while shaking this tiny vial she had on a necklace, explaining to me that the vial represented how little liquid baby actually needed. This was, of course, after I asked for formula.

Shockingly, once I finally got the formula, baby was a contented little dream and we happily did combo feeding for the next several months. Every family should be able to pick the right way to feed their baby for them—the “baby friendly” lactation consultants can be downright frightening for new moms.

I had the same experience with the lactation consultant physically touching me without permission. We left the hospital less than 24 hours after my daughter was born because I was so uncomfortable. They took her to the nursery that night but told me they wouldn’t do so until after 11pm (she was born 11 hours earlier than that) and gave me a hard time about it. I had to push and then they didn’t show up to take her as promised. I had to keep calling and then when they finally showed they told me that they’d bring her back in whenever she cried. I told them that they should absolutely not do that and to give her formula, and they were absolutely incredulous. It was not a good experience.

It seems like the only thing the nurses are supposed to do it take vitals. There doesn’t seem to be any support or any care of any other kind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As I think someone else mentioned, “baby friendly” is a designation that helps the hospitals get more funding when they hit certain metrics. I didn’t mind the required rooming in but the worst part for me were the lactation consultants. Honestly, what happens to make these women so obsessed with forcing nursing on other women? One grabbed my chest without permission while shaking this tiny vial she had on a necklace, explaining to me that the vial represented how little liquid baby actually needed. This was, of course, after I asked for formula.

Shockingly, once I finally got the formula, baby was a contented little dream and we happily did combo feeding for the next several months. Every family should be able to pick the right way to feed their baby for them—the “baby friendly” lactation consultants can be downright frightening for new moms.

I had the same experience with the lactation consultant physically touching me without permission. We left the hospital less than 24 hours after my daughter was born because I was so uncomfortable. They took her to the nursery that night but told me they wouldn’t do so until after 11pm (she was born 11 hours earlier than that) and gave me a hard time about it. I had to push and then they didn’t show up to take her as promised. I had to keep calling and then when they finally showed they told me that they’d bring her back in whenever she cried. I told them that they should absolutely not do that and to give her formula, and they were absolutely incredulous. It was not a good experience.

That’s nuts. I swear, society is only comfortable with moms who act like their own needs don’t matter. Misery is not a necessary part of motherhood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:U.S. maternity & postpartum care isn’t exactly the envy of the world.

U.S women’s healthcare in general is not the envy of the world unfortunately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having a baby is hard work. Whoever told you it was a vacation? Years ago women stayed in hospital two weeks after giving birth but that was before greedy insurance companies took over the medical profession. Sadly, the populace lemmings followed these avaricious companies over the cliff.

We have so many reasons to have a 2nd revolution in the U.S.

I was born in 1969. My Mom was in the hospital for a week after a normal, vaginal birth. She says she was treated like a Queen. I stayed in the nursery with the other babies most of the time, while my Mom rested. Nurses gave her daily back massages and sponge baths, and lessons on baby care. This was in Virginia. How far we have fallen as a society. It’s sad.

How idiotic that this was ever a thing. Nurses are medical professionals, not masseuses.or spa employees.

Nurses are not doctors. They are care givers in hospitals that do the caregiving. Family does caregiving at home, nurses do caregiving in hospitals. These include giving medicines, monitaring vital signs, change the dressings, back massages, bathing and changing the patients, helping them do exercises, helping them eat and drink. , helping them keep clean and comfortable, helping them to sleep uninterrupted, helping with care of newborn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where do these nurses for holding babies magic come from?

Appropriate hospital staffing. Doesn't have to be highly medically trained staff to fulfill this function either, just gentle responsible and common sense providers.

LOL. Good luck with that. Nursing is completely short staffed in 2023. They aren’t going to hire some phantom “gentle, responsible and common sense” non-nursing staff either.

Import nurses from India. English speaking, college educated, well trained, willing to work hard and for less pay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had my last baby at Inova Fairfax 15 years ago by c-section. I was able to send the baby to the nursery so that I could get some rest and recover. I wasn’t in any condition to pick up and care for the baby alone and DH couldn’t stay with me because he was at home with our older kids. I can’t imagine a hospital refusing to care for newborns in the nursery.

Have things changed so much? Patients need to loudly complain to the hospital staff, patient advocate, their doctors, and insurance company. File a formal complaint, if necessary.

Lack of care for mothers and newborns shouldn’t be tolerated.

Same here. Gave birth at Shady Grove by C-Section 13 years ago. I was in the hospital for three days. We kept her the first night and got no sleep. My husband became sick and couldn't stay with me after the first night so we took her to the nursery. The nursery took her at 8:00 or 9:00 and I was able to get full night sleep. She did come back from the nursery with a pacifier stuck in her mouth and it took her 3 years to break the habit. Otherwise, the nursery was a lifesaver. I can't imagine not having it for mothers who had c-sections, difficult births and/or no one to stay in the room with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As I think someone else mentioned, “baby friendly” is a designation that helps the hospitals get more funding when they hit certain metrics. I didn’t mind the required rooming in but the worst part for me were the lactation consultants. Honestly, what happens to make these women so obsessed with forcing nursing on other women? One grabbed my chest without permission while shaking this tiny vial she had on a necklace, explaining to me that the vial represented how little liquid baby actually needed. This was, of course, after I asked for formula.

Shockingly, once I finally got the formula, baby was a contented little dream and we happily did combo feeding for the next several months. Every family should be able to pick the right way to feed their baby for them—the “baby friendly” lactation consultants can be downright frightening for new moms.

(I'm super duper in love with breastfeeding and it's my favorite thing about being a mom. I also have enough milk for triplets.) After the HELL that was nursing my first in the hospital (my milk didn't come in until day 5 and baby was starving), I brought formula to the hospital for baby 2 and 3. Didn't impact my McArthur dairy supply at all and never used it after. I would nurse them and give them colostrum, then top them off with formula. I had 9lb babies and they just weren't satisfied with the drop of colostrum like the lactation consultants said they should be. Newborns also shred your nipples.

I think that giving formula exclusively and never nursing at all before milk comes in will impact supply. But for subsequent babies, your body knows what to do. It's like I delivered and then 5 days later the taps opened. I never tell people this because there's so much judgement about formula, but formula is perfect for those first days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where do these nurses for holding babies magic come from?

Appropriate hospital staffing. Doesn't have to be highly medically trained staff to fulfill this function either, just gentle responsible and common sense providers.

LOL. Good luck with that. Nursing is completely short staffed in 2023. They aren’t going to hire some phantom “gentle, responsible and common sense” non-nursing staff either.

Import nurses from India. English speaking, college educated, well trained, willing to work hard and for less pay.

NP. Both of our moms would have sat and rocked babies all day when we were in the hospital. Except there wasn't a rocking chair in the postpartum room (but there was one in labor and delivery- why?!). Why don't they allow dads or grandparents to rock babies in the nursery? I just needed to sleep away from my crying babies. DH trying to soothe a crying baby while I slept wasn't working.

Or maybe we could hire someone like a doula or night nurse- "postpartum hospital helper nurse" and bring them to the hospital with us? After all, my vaginal deliveries were 29k and 36k, surely that gets me a little help?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me it wasn’t just the nurses, but the sheer volume of people and none of them coordinate.

-the nurses who do vitals
-the residents
-the actual docs
-the janitor/people emptying trash
-the person who would take my blood (not the same as the nurses)
-the pharmacy people
-the pediatrician
-the people in charge of the paperwork/birth certificate
-the lactation consultant
-I’m probably forgetting a few

It was so horrible. I still cannot fathom why things are set up this way.

-the chaplain
-the photographer
-the cafeteria menu lady

OMG the cafeteria menu lady is so spot on.

Haha that was the one interruption I appreciated, it only happened during daylight hours and I was so hungry!

We just had a menu and I had to call down. Btw, premade sandwiches should be available for those of us moms who deliver after dinner hours and are starving. You know, because they don't let you eat for days while in labor.