Hope

Anonymous
I am am two years post finding out about some very inappropriate behavior on the part of my DH. It's been tough. 6 months of therapy. One year of random anger on my part. 20lbs gained and lost as part of the process. Recognizing my worth, deciding to stay, but doing the whole "trust by verify" thing. Now I don't do it. Consider it a wake up call. We are better, not perfect, but better. Just offering some hope to others that may be struggling with similar. My deal was 2x you are out. So if there is another situation, I will leave. But for now, I am back loving my DH, and feeling good about the future.

Anonymous
That would be a more hopeful story for me if I were not dealing with the aftermath of a 2nd round of inappropriate behavior on the part of my DH. But I am glad for you! I know how hard that can be & I am happy that you are finding peace with your decision, your relationship, and are hopeful.
Anonymous
So sorry pp I would leave
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:So sorry pp I would leave


Is that faux pity OP? Be careful.
Anonymous
While I always like to hear about happy endings OP, I was just curious...Why the number [i]two?[i]

Some women wouldn't have given one chance, much less two.

Is it the whole "Three Strikes and You're Out" mentality??!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:While I always like to hear about happy endings OP, I was just curious...Why the number [i]two?[i]

Some women wouldn't have given one chance, much less two.

Is it the whole "Three Strikes and You're Out" mentality??!


you're vicious.
Anonymous
OP -

Hugs. I think a piece of you will never see him as the man he once was to you. You can move forward but you will never forget. Hopefully he is worth the trust you place in him.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:While I always like to hear about happy endings OP, I was just curious...Why the number [i]two?[i]

Some women wouldn't have given one chance, much less two.

Is it the whole "Three Strikes and You're Out" mentality??!


I domt know what the OPs husband did, but my DH is an amazing father. we have two boys who thinks he walks on water. No way would I turn their world upsidown over one mistake. When you have kids you are no longer just looking out for #1, but instead have innocen human beings in the mix.

Hopefully there will never be a situation like OP has faced for me, but I would not take destroying my children's security and stability lightly.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:While I always like to hear about happy endings OP, I was just curious...Why the number [i]two?[i]

Some women wouldn't have given one chance, much less two.

Is it the whole "Three Strikes and You're Out" mentality??!


I domt know what the OPs husband did, but my DH is an amazing father. we have two boys who thinks he walks on water. No way would I turn their world upsidown over one mistake. When you have kids you are no longer just looking out for #1, but instead have innocen human beings in the mix.

Hopefully there will never be a situation like OP has faced for me, but I would not take destroying my children's security and stability lightly.


Hopefully your husband is nothing like OP's. However, walking from someone who disrespects his wife and who is a bad role model for his children may be the best thing a woman can do in certain circumstances.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP -

Hugs. I think a piece of you will never see him as the man he once was to you. You can move forward but you will never forget. Hopefully he is worth the trust you place in him.


Well said. But while she may never see him the same, perhaps there's room for her to see him in a more human, fallible, loving light. People grow from their transgressions (sometimes). How impossibly hard is it to let them grow? Maybe OP can say for own case. As a man that has made (a lot of)l mistakes and cost the people I love, I can only say I have a lot of respect for the strength it takes for OP to give her husband the chance to grow, as I hope he would for her.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:While I always like to hear about happy endings OP, I was just curious...Why the number two?[i]

Some women wouldn't have given one chance, much less two.

Is it the whole "Three Strikes and You're Out" mentality??!


I domt know what the OPs husband did, but my DH is an amazing father. we have two boys who thinks he walks on water. No way would I turn their world upsidown over one mistake. When you have kids you are no longer just looking out for #1, but instead have innocen human beings in the mix.

Hopefully there will never be a situation like OP has faced for me, but I would not take destroying my children's security and stability lightly.


Hopefully your husband is nothing like OP's. However, walking from someone who disrespects his wife and who is a bad role model for his children may be the best thing a woman can do in certain circumstances.


It dismays me when I see responders on this forum attack and flame [i]anyone
who chooses to stay w/a man who doesn't treat them well because of the kids, money, etc.

It's like something is wrong w/them.

This mentality is quite troubling to me.

It should be the opposite.
If a man has mistreated a woman, then she should by all means be encouraged to leave him. Just because she has children w/someone doesn't give her husband a free pass to be mean, untrue and/or dishonest.

Bad behavior should be acknowledged for exactly what it is and should be dealt w/accordingly in my opinion.
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