Catholic v Protestant

[Anonymous]

My husband and I are trying to sort out what to raise our children. He was raised Catholic, is not practicing but more out of inertia than anything else. I was raised Protestant (Congregationalist). Can anyone point us to a good source or two for sorting out who believes what in Catholicism and main stream Protestantism (word?) . . .we are trying to peacefully come to a decision and understand our own beliefs more. Thanks in advance.

[Anonymous]

Apparently the bible is a great source for all Christian doctrines.

Although given your need to "understand your own beliefs more" you might also want to consider allowing your children to make their own minds up without filling their heads with the type of dogmatic nonsense that you yourselves appear to be ignorant of.

[Anonymous]

You can try a Unitarian church...they accept everyone all under one roof.

[Anonymous]

If you want them to have MORE guilt = Catholicism
LESS guilt = anything else

[Anonymous]

If you two don't care- your kids won't care- a friend of mine who was protestant but not practicing told me her child was mad at her (she's now a teen) for never introducing her to religion. It's your call- but I do believe introducing some religion helps with basic values. i

[Anonymous]

PP wth catholic anger- get some help.. if this can incite this reaction- it's obviously affected you way beyong-

[Anonymous]

PP, are you drunk?

[Anonymous]

Ha ha... as a "recovering Catholic" myself, I actually thought 23:29 was spot on!

Bottom line though... there are relatively few differences in doctrine between Catholicism and what you're calling main-stream Protestantism. The Biblical stories are the same. The ideas of Heaven and Hell are the same. The idea of embracing and loving Christ are the same. From my own perspective and experience, I've found that the difference comes in an institutional focus... and yes, I think "guilt" is a far more prominent theme in Catholicism than it is in other Christian denominations -- I suspect its tied into the Catholic notion of reconciliation (pennance).

Where I think Catholicism is different is in the rituals and practices: e.g., the host at Mass is actually transformed into Christ's body, whereas in other Christian denominations, the host is merely representative of Christ's body; or, the practice of a formal reconciliation/pennance for the forgiveness of sins.

My suggestion to you is to not get hung up too much on the differences. And more importantly talk about what YOU believe and your HUSBAND believes... (rather than what the Protestant or Catholic church believes). Raise your child with God. When you get to Sunday school age, you can make that decision based on whether or not you've found a nice church that you like, etc. If husband is basically non-practicing... it sounds like he wouldn't be too averse to you taking the kids to your church?

I think the thought of having to "pick one" when the kids are young is less important. Most Protestant churches are less formal (and more likely to accept kids from various other denominational backgrounds). The kicker may come at age 13, when Catholics are "confirmed". At this stage, kids are asked to "choose" Catholicism as their faith (although they can certainly postpone the decision and become confirmed later). At that point, at least in the eyes of the Catholic Church... you are choosing CATHOLICISM (rather than a broader form of Christianity). But, my suspicion is you've got a number of years to figure this all out.

[Anonymous]

As a Catholic married to a Jew, I'll throw in my two cents on how to choose. Decide if you and your spouse want to provide your children with a formal religious upbringing/education/affiliation/identity. If you don't, then there's really no need to go any further. If you do, then you need to make a decision on one religion as the primary religion -- which doesn't necessarily mean that you can't have an interfaith house. Although Catholicism and Protestantism aren't all that different. For us, there are big cultural differences not to mention the holidays. We opted to go the Catholic route for a number of reasons: (1) formal religious education for our children was more important to me than my husband and I agreed to take responsibility for it; (2) my whole family is Catholic and attends the same church (every now and then but always on holidays) as a family and we didn't want to be left out; (3) we thought private school would be a possibility down the road and Catholic school is way cheaper than Jewish Day (4) b/c I am not Jewish, my children would not be recognized as being Jewish without having a formal conversion for them (and perhaps me depending on whether we went to a conservative or reformed temple), etc.

So, we're raising our kids Catholic BUT they know that Daddy and his parents and siblings are Jewish and we talk about their beliefs and celebrate holidays with them -- so we consider ourselves to have a truly interfaith home. In terms of formal training, if our kids don't end up in Catholic school, then they will go to CCD/Sunday School and will receive the Catholic sacraments (communion, confirmation).

FWIW, my husband and I are bleeding heart liberals -- pro-choice, pro-gay marriage, pro-stem cell research, anti-guns, anti-death penalty, and huge supporters of social justice issues (per our careers and volunteerism). Some Catholics would say that I'm not a real Catholic given my beliefs -- and I would respond that I am a real Catholic and that my faith is between me and the big Guy. I understand the PP's criticism of Catholicism -- but I would challenge that person to show me an organized religion anywhere that officially mirrors my beliefs. It doesn't exist. So I suggest you find a church/congregation with a cool priest/pastor and sense of community and run with it. We're now officially church hoppers -- we loved our first one b/c the head priest was super cool and welcoming -- his replacement is a complete and total ass -- so we went church shopping and found another cool priest (who says that what really matters is having faith in something larger than yourself and living your life as a kind person -- which pretty much sums up my philosophy on religion).

Best of luck to you.

[Anonymous]

Amen 9:11am PP -- very well put.

[Anonymous]

To add another thing to consider - find a church that works for you.

I was raised Catholic and just assumed that you went to the church closest to you. Well, this church did not work for our family. We shopped around a bit and found a parish that does work for us.

We attend Holy Trinity Parish in DC - and about a lot of the members are from either Maryland or Virginia.

Holy Trinity has a program called coming home, conversations about doubt and faith. Here is a link:
http://www.holytrinitydc.org/Education/AdEd/ComingHome/index.htm
I am sure many churches will have a similar program. You may want to attend something like this before you make the decision on what faith you want to raise your children.

[Anonymous]

Another approach would be to go see "Religulous" with your DH, out in theaters now. Then skip the whole question completely.

[Anonymous]

Agreed. You don't have to start pretending to believe in god just because you have kids. There are ways of teaching ethics without the Ten Commandments, for example.

[Anonymous]

Some of my most profoundly religious friends (former missionaries, even!) do not adhere to a specific religion (Baptist, Methodist, whatever). They go to lots of different churches til they find one that is comfortable. From their way of thinking, everyone starts with the same Bible. Since community is an important part of church-belonging, they find the community, figuring that God will be there too.

Why don't you and your husband do something like that? Attend a few services at various churches, and see if any of them feel like "home"? A good congregation and a good pastor or priest will do lots more towards helping you understand your beliefs than any textual study will.

[Anonymous]

Read the Catechism if you want to know exactly what us Catholics believe in. It is very clear and concise. No hokey-pokey wording.

It covers everything from Jesus to contraception to family and everything in between.

Be mindful of the reasons to becoming Catholic - poster 0911 seemed to have done it for the wrong reasons: ("we didn't want to be left out; (3) we thought private school would be a possibility down the road and Catholic school is way cheaper than Jewish Day").
In fact, the 0911 poster sounds more of a cafeteria-catholic...I am not sure that calling yourself a catholic because you can't find another religon that reflects your beliefs (pro-choice, pro-gay marriage, pro-stem cell research) is a wise choice, but to each his own...it's not for any of us to judge (just an opinion).