Where to go when family vacations keep sucking

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Places we have been that went poorly: Portland/PacNW, Colorado, NYC.

What are you trying to do on your vacations, aka what do you consider fun? If the best vacation so far was Disney, sounds like your family might benefit more from a beach or other laidback vacation rather than a city-based one built on sightseeing and restaurants? Totally not knocking that, just trying to identify what worked at Disney and what didn't work in those locales. Maybe it was the resort element of Disney that appealed, even without the theme park, so pick a resort setting in a locale that you like.

Yeah before kids our vacations were either cities/museums or hiking. So we were, I guess, trying to keep that going. And now I guess it’s time to pivot to more of a resort type vacation, which isn’t something DH or I would pick otherwise. So I’m sort of at a loss.

You could do a staycation so you don't have to worry about sleeping arrangements. Find new hiking trails, new museums, etc.

Or how about try a resort place in Arizona - you can get some hiking in AND still chill by the pool. Just don't over-schedule it.

For example:
Hyatt Regency Scottsdale offers a lot on-site (water park, cultural programs, etc.) and also shuttles for hiking. So your older child can go do something fun while the younger one naps in the room.
https://www.hyatt.com/en-US/hotel/arizona/hyatt-regency-scottsdale-resort-and-spa/scott

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We do have good trips with our kids but I’m not saying we always have or that there have never been rough moments when traveling or that it’s easy. I am willing to learn from what went wrong on past trips and try to not make the same mistake again going forward.

I do hear you that sleeping issues are a problem, and basically I’ve learned that if we don’t get enough sleep nobody has a good time. And we are a family of 5 (2 adults and three kids who are 5, 8, and 10 right now) so I find this really limits our options on where we can go. A lot of times, I’m priced out of nice hotels because I don’t want to pay for two rooms. What that means is, we still travel but we go places where I feel comfortable renting a VRBO or where we can afford to get two rooms, etc. A VRBO also gives us a kitchen. I don’t know about you, but it’s not easy or necessarily enjoyable for me to spend three meals a day for a week with young kids in a restaurant. I am happy to eat two meals at home and eat out one meal a day when we’re on vacation or even order takeout and bring it back to our place to eat, etc. I know that means we have to do dishes, but for us, this is preferable (YMMV). We are not cooking gourmet meals - we are having our regular breakfast and say, PB & J or turkey sandwiches for lunch, etc.

And I wouldn’t say that all of our trips are kid centric such as Disney World, but I’m willing to go to Disney World and in general my husband & I are happy on vacation when our kids are happy so I don’t try to force them to do adult tourism things all day.

In general, I say: have low expectations and try make sure everyone gets enough sleep as reasonably possible. For us, we can’t go all day every day. We need to plan one big outing a day and still leave time for the kids to stop and smell the roses, or skip rocks in the Virgin River for an hour, as the case may be.

Lately, I am into National Parks as affordable options. Last spring break we did Vegas / Zion / Bryce and I did certain things to make the trip more enjoyable for kids such as researching best hotel pools for kids in Vegas (and we stayed at Mandalay Bay and they did really like the pools). We are going to SD (Rushmore / Custer / Badlands) this summer and for two nights we are staying at the Rapid City hotel connected to a water park. We have rented very nice VRBOs in Acadia and in Hilton Head island.

Next year I am turning 40 and it is our 15 year anniversary. I wanted to do a “big” anniversary trip for spring break (including the kids). And do you know what we are doing? My husband wanted warm weather and we don’t pull the kids out of school for travel so we are going at an expensive time (story of my life). And, what we can afford to do is our first Royal Caribbean cruise, Oasis class ship, with two adjoining oceanview balcony rooms. I might have had something more exotic in mind at first theoretically but I am actually really looking forward to this trip.

One last thing is that I “let” everyone in the family pick at least one activity that they want to do on the trip, including my husband and me. If anyone complains I just say, part of being in a family is taking turns / doing what others want at times etc. & you get your turn to pick too. This is also good because sometimes you end up really liking something you wouldn’t have picked yourself!

Great advice!

[Anonymous]

It's not the location. It's your family and you won't ever escape them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We do have good trips with our kids but I’m not saying we always have or that there have never been rough moments when traveling or that it’s easy. I am willing to learn from what went wrong on past trips and try to not make the same mistake again going forward.

I do hear you that sleeping issues are a problem, and basically I’ve learned that if we don’t get enough sleep nobody has a good time. And we are a family of 5 (2 adults and three kids who are 5, 8, and 10 right now) so I find this really limits our options on where we can go. A lot of times, I’m priced out of nice hotels because I don’t want to pay for two rooms. What that means is, we still travel but we go places where I feel comfortable renting a VRBO or where we can afford to get two rooms, etc. A VRBO also gives us a kitchen. I don’t know about you, but it’s not easy or necessarily enjoyable for me to spend three meals a day for a week with young kids in a restaurant. I am happy to eat two meals at home and eat out one meal a day when we’re on vacation or even order takeout and bring it back to our place to eat, etc. I know that means we have to do dishes, but for us, this is preferable (YMMV). We are not cooking gourmet meals - we are having our regular breakfast and say, PB & J or turkey sandwiches for lunch, etc.

And I wouldn’t say that all of our trips are kid centric such as Disney World, but I’m willing to go to Disney World and in general my husband & I are happy on vacation when our kids are happy so I don’t try to force them to do adult tourism things all day.

In general, I say: have low expectations and try make sure everyone gets enough sleep as reasonably possible. For us, we can’t go all day every day. We need to plan one big outing a day and still leave time for the kids to stop and smell the roses, or skip rocks in the Virgin River for an hour, as the case may be.

Lately, I am into National Parks as affordable options. Last spring break we did Vegas / Zion / Bryce and I did certain things to make the trip more enjoyable for kids such as researching best hotel pools for kids in Vegas (and we stayed at Mandalay Bay and they did really like the pools). We are going to SD (Rushmore / Custer / Badlands) this summer and for two nights we are staying at the Rapid City hotel connected to a water park. We have rented very nice VRBOs in Acadia and in Hilton Head island.

Next year I am turning 40 and it is our 15 year anniversary. I wanted to do a “big” anniversary trip for spring break (including the kids). And do you know what we are doing? My husband wanted warm weather and we don’t pull the kids out of school for travel so we are going at an expensive time (story of my life). And, what we can afford to do is our first Royal Caribbean cruise, Oasis class ship, with two adjoining oceanview balcony rooms. I might have had something more exotic in mind at first theoretically but I am actually really looking forward to this trip.

One last thing is that I “let” everyone in the family pick at least one activity that they want to do on the trip, including my husband and me. If anyone complains I just say, part of being in a family is taking turns / doing what others want at times etc. & you get your turn to pick too. This is also good because sometimes you end up really liking something you wouldn’t have picked yourself!

Great advice!

Agreed! Sounds a lot like our "journey" to improve our family trips- came to almost the exact same place on prioritizing sleep to get everyone in a good place, and thus to aim for apartment/home rentals for more space and comfort, and thus, sleep.

[Anonymous]

One of our favorite trips when the kids were little was to MDI in Maine. We stayed at one of the cabins at the KOA Waterside campground (make sure it's the waterside one, not the one closer to Bar Harbor)
Lots of very chill activities for the kids, a few short hikes, delicious ice cream. It was great.

[Anonymous]

We didn't take many real vacations, other than to visit family or left our children behind, until the youngest was 3 or 4.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We didn't take many real vacations, other than to visit family or left our children behind, until the youngest was 3 or 4.

Same. If we took vacations before age 5 at all, it was usually to visit family, or a direct flight beach vacation.

[Anonymous]

Tyler Place

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The last couple trips with my 7 yr old and rambunctious now 18 month old DS have been miserable with lots of whining about food choices, sleeping arrangements, etc. The best trip we have had TBH was Disney but DH doesn’t really want to go back. At this point I want to bag the entire concept of family vacations. Any advice?

There are no vacations with small children. There are only trips.

If you want a vacation, leave the kids with the grandparents and go with your husband somewhere. Win-win for all involved.

[Anonymous]

https://www.deervalleyymca.org/programs/summer-family-camp/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We didn't take many real vacations, other than to visit family or left our children behind, until the youngest was 3 or 4.

Same. If we took vacations before age 5 at all, it was usually to visit family, or a direct flight beach vacation.

This. Simplify your vacations until the youngest is 3 or 4 and you’ll start enjoying the vacations much more.

[Anonymous]

I feel like some of this is of course based on kids’ personalities but also parental perspective. We’ve traveled extensively with our kids, including when they were toddlers, and I wouldn’t say we’ve ever had a bad trip. We spent a week in Italy sought seeing like mad with a 6 yo and a 1.5 yo. On this and other trips, there were meltdowns, complaining, a jet lagged toddler wanting to play at 3 am, crying on the plane at some point, no time to relax, etc, but these things didn’t define the trip/were not what happened the majority of the time. The good parts far outweighed the annoyances for us.

I assume your experience has been different if you consider the entire trips to be disasters. In that case, something like a camping trip, a cabin, or a few days at a beach might be better for your family right now. No expectations except everyone swimming/hiking/hanging out. Something low key.

[Anonymous]

Disney wise you can also "rent" DVC points to stay at one of the DVC properties (Disney World, Disneyland, Hawaii, Vero Beach, Hilton Head) which include kitchenette's. They also have 1/2 bedrooms (with sleeper sofa's or murphy beds in the living room).

Otherwise we 100% plan our trips (even Disney) around sleeping hahaha. If we're staying up late the night before, say for the Halloween Party at WDW, then we don't do a park the following day. Then we can sleep in and have a lounging type of day. Park days we like to go super early so we can do more before:
1. More people arrive (shorter lines)
2. Weather is cooler
3. Kids are "fresh" after a good nights sleep and food

I find in general that doing things in the morning, then taking a break in the afternoon is a good plan for any type of vacation.

[Anonymous]

Maybe just put your money into their 529's or your 401K's and skip the vacations.

[Anonymous]

Tyler Place Family Resort.

www.tylerplace.com