S/O- what makes part-time so great?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a perfectly time thread - thanks OP and PPs

I've been working 4 days a week since DC1 was born 6 years ago. I've been considering applying for a promotion (I've been promoted while being PT, but have reached the top of my career ladder, so have to apply to make the next move) and that job requires full time.

The one day a week I spent with DC1 was so special that I'm really torn about giving it up (DC2 is now 2, so still 3 years until K). That said, the promotion is the job I always pictured myself ending up in, and if i don't go for it now whoever gets it will prob hang onto it for years/decades (the current guy has been there 20 years, applicants are likely in their mid-late 30s)

So i'm torn - i want the new job, I want to keep my PT schedule.

I'm a fed, but in a uncommon position (e.g. not a lawyer), so movement between agencies isn't a reliable option. I feel like the decision is kid vs. job. It's helplful to hear from all the people who really value their PT schedule, a reminder of what I'd be giving up.

Hmm...decisions, decisions

It's a really personal decision. I am one who worked a four day schedule for a few years and then took the opportunity for a promotion. In my case, it was when there were major layoffs from the recession in my company and that weighed on my decision, since the promotion really helped me secure my place, and of course, the extra money is not just a luxury but a necessity. But honestly, I was ready. I wanted to excel at work and I couldn't go much further in a PT or reduced capacity.

That said, I still work 45 hours a week, no evening and weekends, am home by 6, etc. So I think I have pretty good balance, and DH's job is very flexible and he does a ton. If my circumstances were different I might think differently but I was totally ready. I figured I have decades left in my career and I didn't want to squander reasonable opportunities.

[Anonymous]

New poster here, I think it is true regardless of gender to the extent the reason for not working part time is a view that part time workers are inferior for having made that choice

That's not quite it. It's that in my workplace, I won't get the good assignments and on time promotions if I went p/t, and yes, my career means something to me. It's not that my children are second class citizens in our home. I sacrifice plenty for them - just not my career, all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a perfectly time thread - thanks OP and PPs

I've been working 4 days a week since DC1 was born 6 years ago. I've been considering applying for a promotion (I've been promoted while being PT, but have reached the top of my career ladder, so have to apply to make the next move) and that job requires full time.

The one day a week I spent with DC1 was so special that I'm really torn about giving it up (DC2 is now 2, so still 3 years until K). That said, the promotion is the job I always pictured myself ending up in, and if i don't go for it now whoever gets it will prob hang onto it for years/decades (the current guy has been there 20 years, applicants are likely in their mid-late 30s)

So i'm torn - i want the new job, I want to keep my PT schedule.

I'm a fed, but in a uncommon position (e.g. not a lawyer), so movement between agencies isn't a reliable option. I feel like the decision is kid vs. job. It's helplful to hear from all the people who really value their PT schedule, a reminder of what I'd be giving up.

Hmm...decisions, decisions

Take the long view..in three years, you won't care about that extra day, because your child will be in school.

[Anonymous]

I work 3 days a week and love it. I enjoy my job, make decent money and get some extra time to myself. Makes our family life less stressful and DH and I have more time together. I get benefits through DH's job but don't have retirement. We do live less lavishly than we otherwise would if I was working part-time, but I figure I'll never look back on this time and wish I had worked more. I really enjoy the balance. I'm not super ambitious in general though, so it's partially just something that works for my personality.

[Anonymous]

I work 32 hours and have Wednesdays off. I love having the day to make doctors and dentists appointments. I have three kids, and I usually take them to the dentist one at a time. I also work out with my trainer that day. Every other week, my DH and I will have a lunch date that day. I can do drop off and pick up of the kids from school that day.

When the kids get older I expect that I'll want to do 5 shorter days.

It's a major luxury for me and it really helps me be less stressed, a better mom and a better wife. I'm not worried about college and retirement savings. We are saving what we can which is pretty decent. If I have to work longer, then so be it. My dad is 70 and still working even though he could easily retire because he loves working.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a perfectly time thread - thanks OP and PPs

I've been working 4 days a week since DC1 was born 6 years ago. I've been considering applying for a promotion (I've been promoted while being PT, but have reached the top of my career ladder, so have to apply to make the next move) and that job requires full time.

The one day a week I spent with DC1 was so special that I'm really torn about giving it up (DC2 is now 2, so still 3 years until K). That said, the promotion is the job I always pictured myself ending up in, and if i don't go for it now whoever gets it will prob hang onto it for years/decades (the current guy has been there 20 years, applicants are likely in their mid-late 30s)

So i'm torn - i want the new job, I want to keep my PT schedule.

I'm a fed, but in a uncommon position (e.g. not a lawyer), so movement between agencies isn't a reliable option. I feel like the decision is kid vs. job. It's helplful to hear from all the people who really value their PT schedule, a reminder of what I'd be giving up.

Hmm...decisions, decisions

Take the long view..in three years, you won't care about that extra day, because your child will be in school.

Interestingly, it is the “long view” that’s giving me pause – I know how fast three years can go, and i don’t want to look back on them and feel like I lost time with DC because I went to work full time.
In three years there’d be no question about wanting the full-time job…but in three years DC won’t be two, won’t stare in wonder at the elephants at the zoo or think that I’m the most fun playmate he’s ever had.
9:06 – it is such a personal decision, you’re totally right. I can’t find anyone who can really help me figure it out, because it’s so personal to me. Even DH doesn’t get it – he knows that one day a week I stay home to play, but that I’m still good at my job – he says it’d be fine either way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What makes it great for me is that it gives me just the right balance between my work-self and my home-self. I am domestic by nature - I love the domestic arts such as sewing, knitting, cooking, housecleaning, decorating, etc. - and working part-time enables me to satisfy domesticity-cravings. When I worked full-time, I always felt frustrated in that regard. The other thing I love about working part-time is that my kids, ages 15 and 12, are at ages where they'll talk when it suits them, and not when it doesn't, and it generally suits them to talk right when they get home from school. In the evenings, they tend to have moved past or forgotten whatever went on during the day, and they clam up. My 15yo in particular is a very anxious kid, prone to social anxiety, and I am glad that I can be here for him when he needs to talk.

RE my schedule, I am a lawyer and work about 25-30 hours a week, spread over three days. (Two days, I don't work at all.) I am flexible about start and stop-times, and occasionally work in the evening or on an off-day during a crisis, but by and large my off-days are sacred.

I don't worry much about saving for retirement because DH and I both max out our contributions and we are on track to retiring at a reasonable age. Ditto re: college savings. Our financial planner tells us that if I never make more than I currently do, we will be fine.

Because we save so much in 401ks and 529s, our take-home pay isn't great, and we do live pretty frugally. It doesn't bother me at all to live this way, however, because doing all those things to save money (cooking, freezing, thrifting) are part of the domestic arts I love so much.

Bottom-line, working part-time makes me feel human and whole in ways that I never felt when I worked full-time. I may never work full-time again.

This perfectly describes me. I have so many interests and need outlets for creative expression, learning other new things , etc. that don't necessarily fit into what I do professionally. I felt so stifled after years of only having time to do my professional job. I was overcompensating in unhealthful ways: eating too much, drinking too much, not taking care of myself, battlign depression, anxiety, and mood swings. By freeing up extra hours in my day when I do not have to be at my professional job, I am able to be a fuller, more realized person. I always felt like I was squeezing myself into a tiny little box by forcing myself to only do one thing, my job, for almost all of my waking hours. I had to go to therapy to realize that it was ok to NOT do it, even if I did it well. My therapist gave me an expression to remember whenever I feel myself sliding back, which is: "Just b/c you CAN do it, doens't mean you HAVE to do it." My DH and I worked hard to get all our ducks in a row financially and I feel I am more the person I am supposed to be, now that I work half-days. It is like sunlight has entered my life for the first time in about. . almost 18 years, when I started in the workfore. Like I have room to breathe once more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't know. I love full time. I can actually take more time off, I accrue leave faster, make more money. The part timers are second class citizens in my office. No thanks.

huh

I'm a part timer, and b/c I'm good, I tell people where to go. I accomplish more in my 24-hour week than most full timers do.

You would be on my "fuck off" list b/c you're a bitch.

[Anonymous]

I work M-T 8 hour days 32 hours a week. I get 100% of the benefits that a full time employee gets except my pay is reduced from my full time pay. I work only 3 miles away from home and am a six minute drive from my kids daycare. I never felt like I was a second class citizen in the office. On the contrary I am considered one of the most valuable contributors. Recently half our team got laid off and pretty much all the employees who were let go were full time employees. My children are 1 and 2 1/2 so being alone with them on Fridays does keep me busier than sitting at my desk on Monday through Thursday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know. I love full time. I can actually take more time off, I accrue leave faster, make more money. The part timers are second class citizens in my office. No thanks.

huh

I'm a part timer, and b/c I'm good, I tell people where to go. I accomplish more in my 24-hour week than most full timers do.

You would be on my "fuck off" list b/c you're a bitch.]

Wow, you do realize that different offices have different cultures, right? I'm a part timer and am not offended at all by the post you are quoting. You, on the other hand, are quite offensive.

[Anonymous]

I'm part-time 24-ish hours a week. I work M-Th with Fridays off. I love my schedule, though I do worry about retirement (I'm contract, so no 401k for me). I have a Roth IRA and we save pretty aggressively in other ways. My salary part time (remote) is probably better than what I would find full time in the city I live in now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work 3 days a week and love it. I enjoy my job, make decent money and get some extra time to myself. Makes our family life less stressful and DH and I have more time together. I get benefits through DH's job but don't have retirement. We do live less lavishly than we otherwise would if I was working part-time, but I figure I'll never look back on this time and wish I had worked more. I really enjoy the balance. I'm not super ambitious in general though, so it's partially just something that works for my personality.

So do you and your DH just save separately for your retirement?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know. I love full time. I can actually take more time off, I accrue leave faster, make more money. The part timers are second class citizens in my office. No thanks.

huh

I'm a part timer, and b/c I'm good, I tell people where to go. I accomplish more in my 24-hour week than most full timers do.

You would be on my "fuck off" list b/c you're a bitch.

Um, great for you? Another good thing about full time: I don't have a chip on my shoulder about having to accomplish more than my colleagues who work more hours a week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work 32 hours and have Wednesdays off. I love having the day to make doctors and dentists appointments. I have three kids, and I usually take them to the dentist one at a time. I also work out with my trainer that day. Every other week, my DH and I will have a lunch date that day. I can do drop off and pick up of the kids from school that day.

When the kids get older I expect that I'll want to do 5 shorter days.

It's a major luxury for me and it really helps me be less stressed, a better mom and a better wife. I'm not worried about college and retirement savings. We are saving what we can which is pretty decent. If I have to work longer, then so be it. My dad is 70 and still working even though he could easily retire because he loves working.

Because I work full time, I have about six weeks of leave. I can take a day off most any time at full pay if I need or want time off.

[Anonymous]

"Interestingly, it is the “long view” that’s giving me pause – I know how fast three years can go, and i don’t want to look back on them and feel like I lost time with DC because I went to work full time.
In three years there’d be no question about wanting the full-time job…but in three years DC won’t be two, won’t stare in wonder at the elephants at the zoo or think that I’m the most fun playmate he’s ever had. "

Then you have to know yourself. My youngest is 11, and I would be unhappy now if I'd worked part time and was "behind" in my career