I have a hard time dating because of my height

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Here's the thing - your 5'9" cut off for guys, in addition to being wildly hypocritical, is really hurting you. I'm 5'10" (so, also very tall for a woman, but not as much of an outlier as you) and actually the group of men I strike out with most are the 5'8" - 5'10" guys. They're taller than the VAST majority of women, so why would they pick one of the very few women that are taller than them?

The guys I've dated have all been 5'11" or taller OR under 5'7". Yeah, I've dated a lot of shorties, as small as 5'3". When you're a short dude, you have to make your peace with dating women who are taller than you (otherwise you eliminate like half the population), and once you've done that, what do you care if they're 2 inches taller than you or 7 inches taller than you?

So you're limiting yourself, and for a dumb reason. Bad back? Come on.

OP here I am not a dominant person and I find the only short men interested in me have a domination fetish or they are massively insecure .Also tall men from what I've seen in my area also seek out shorter woman , both my tall brothers tell me they find a woman over 5'8 too tall for them . Lastly 5'10 you are as much as an outlier as me sis we are in the same boat most people can't tell the difference between us .

It’s not your height.

[Anonymous]

Tall woman here 5'11" in flats, and i can totally relate. Fortunate to be off the dating market but wow it was bad. I'm above average looks, and taller than the height of an average man, and it takes a lot of chutzpah to approach me. My sisters are both petite which also made it hard to face.

I married a man my height (not taller but oh well) and we produced a gorgeous DS who is now 6'2" so just wait, OP, the big pay off is coming!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 6'0.5 and I find that it makes dating men a million times harder . I try not to stress over my height because I can't change it .

It's not that I can't find men I can , it's just that men settle for me because of my height or they have a creepy height fetish nothing in between . Some men treat my height as a burden or they date me and still crave a shorter woman .

My cut off is 5'9 because I have back issues and being way taller than a guy makes me uncomfortable.

For a long time I thought it was my looks or my weight or my personality , I did everything to improve that but I still have a hard time because I'm too tall .

I can totally relate. I am a 10/10 in looks and men find it intimidating to approach me. It is so hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to move away from DC. The average height of men here I'd guess is 5"8'

Yes, lots of short men seeking power.

[Anonymous]

Hang in there OP. My nieces are both 5"11 and my older one just got married this summer. It's not the deal breaker you might think.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you the poster who already posted about hating their height? Two short men of my acquaintance specifically sought out tall women to marry so their children would have a chance at a little more height.

This makes it sound like one stood on the other’s shoulders and they wore a long overcoat…

Thank you for this, PP. I laughed.

[Anonymous]

OP, I’m 5’10.5” and I (mostly) stopped minding my height in high school. I always liked being tall, but I felt like it meant I had to discount about 50 percent of guys as potential mates.

I was wrong! Out of all the guys I dated (I got married at 26), most were shorter than me. They didn’t fetishize me, and I wasn’t embarrassed by their height. My husband is 6’1” and I like that he’s tall, but it wasn’t a necessity. In fact, it just means that I bequeathed my height plus an inch to my teenage daughter, who is currently suffering the indignities of being taller than her male classmates. But she already doesn’t mind shorter guys.

That’s all to say that you should put your shoulders back and practice projecting confidence. Aim your gaze down a few inches and include the guys who are 5’7”-5’9”—my two best exes were in that group!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you the poster who already posted about hating their height? Two short men of my acquaintance specifically sought out tall women to marry so their children would have a chance at a little more height. They love their wives dearly. There isn't anything "fetishist" about their relationship, but simply perfectly acceptable matters of personal preference.

You need to work on accepting yourself, OP. Would you rather not date, marry, or have children at all? You can choose to be alone moping in your little corner if you prefer.

This is no different than short women wanting to marry tall men so their kids have a chance at being average height.

[Anonymous]

If you’re in your 20s, there’s a group that does events for tall people to date.