My high stats kid running out of steam

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s not just my kid. DH looked at me the other night and said “maybe DD should take a gap year.” To be clear this kid is high stats and, until about a month ago, loved school. But the whole application process makes college seem like such a poor match for her. She is just a high-stats kid who wants to study math, travel, attend a few games, and explore different areas she might want to pursue in more depth. Colleges seem to want her to already have done all those things before she applies.

This is why I’ll be totally happy if mine ends up at her safety school that admits almost everyone. Freedom to explore, relatively low cost. These kids really need some space to figure themselves out before they get in the fast track to miserable adulthood.

[Anonymous]

My kid is playing a fall sport, a club sport, is in 3 ap classes and volunteers on weekends, and is applying to a couple special programs with unique requirements in addition to the reach/target/ safety thing. She started the essays, but I’m finishing them for her to proofread. I’m handling the common app profile, fafsa, css, college board, and everything else that goes along with this process. The whole thing is very bureaucratic and it’s unrealistic to ask a hs senior to know how to navigate it.

[Anonymous]

Just limit your kid to seven apps; let him pick any seven of the eight Ivy League schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid is playing a fall sport, a club sport, is in 3 ap classes and volunteers on weekends, and is applying to a couple special programs with unique requirements in addition to the reach/target/ safety thing. She started the essays, but I’m finishing them for her to proofread. I’m handling the common app profile, fafsa, css, college board, and everything else that goes along with this process. The whole thing is very bureaucratic and it’s unrealistic to ask a hs senior to know how to navigate it.

Super lame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is playing a fall sport, a club sport, is in 3 ap classes and volunteers on weekends, and is applying to a couple special programs with unique requirements in addition to the reach/target/ safety thing. She started the essays, but I’m finishing them for her to proofread. I’m handling the common app profile, fafsa, css, college board, and everything else that goes along with this process. The whole thing is very bureaucratic and it’s unrealistic to ask a hs senior to know how to navigate it.

Super lame.

Agreed. You’re finishing the essays? And doing the Common App? What the…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You guys need to help your kids out! Fall sports plus school plus 10+ early apps? Too much for 17 yo.

We helped. Helping isn’t a “handout”. Come on.
Both are thriving at T20.

Helped how, specifically? I’m happy to be a proofreader and offer suggestions m, but that’s the extent of it. Of course, my kid isn’t doing 10+ early apps. Maybe instead of helping them with all those apps, you should steer them towards a more manageable load in the first place.

1. Do the research now for all of the schools that are due at the end of the month. They can use that as a jumping off point.

2. Identify which types of essays each school has so that they know which story hooked to start with. For example, community, identity, extracurricular, why major, why school. Make a table to simplify it if that helps or a separate Google doc for each if you have not already done so.

3. Proofread draft, essays and provide detailed comments Not just “consider a new word. Aim to get one done every 48 to 72 hours from now through the end of the month.

4. Review draft PDFs of completed applications and highlight any problems with formatting, including bolding or weird characters that show up. Do a full markup of one common app PDF now so they can fix any problems in the activities, personal essay, additional information or even future plans. Review the whole application to make sure it hangs together well and tells a good story in light of the major chosen.

5. If applying to selective competitive top 20 schools: ask yourself if the application tells a compelling story? Does it make your kid seem like someone they need to have in their class? If not, help them add more personal qualities in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is playing a fall sport, a club sport, is in 3 ap classes and volunteers on weekends, and is applying to a couple special programs with unique requirements in addition to the reach/target/ safety thing. She started the essays, but I’m finishing them for her to proofread. I’m handling the common app profile, fafsa, css, college board, and everything else that goes along with this process. The whole thing is very bureaucratic and it’s unrealistic to ask a hs senior to know how to navigate it.

Super lame.

Agreed. You’re finishing the essays? And doing the Common App? What the…

Are you new to this world?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is playing a fall sport, a club sport, is in 3 ap classes and volunteers on weekends, and is applying to a couple special programs with unique requirements in addition to the reach/target/ safety thing. She started the essays, but I’m finishing them for her to proofread. I’m handling the common app profile, fafsa, css, college board, and everything else that goes along with this process. The whole thing is very bureaucratic and it’s unrealistic to ask a hs senior to know how to navigate it.

Super lame.

Agreed. You’re finishing the essays? And doing the Common App? What the…

Are you new to this world?

DP. Nope, neither of us are. Not ok at all to write their essays for them. If your kids can’t do that part, they’re either not cut out for the schools they’re applying to or they’re not cut out for the current schedule they have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is playing a fall sport, a club sport, is in 3 ap classes and volunteers on weekends, and is applying to a couple special programs with unique requirements in addition to the reach/target/ safety thing. She started the essays, but I’m finishing them for her to proofread. I’m handling the common app profile, fafsa, css, college board, and everything else that goes along with this process. The whole thing is very bureaucratic and it’s unrealistic to ask a hs senior to know how to navigate it.

Super lame.

Agreed. You’re finishing the essays? And doing the Common App? What the…

That’s fine to judge. I think paying for essay or college consultants is lame. I suspect what I’m doing is being considered by many. Just thought I’d throw it out there so those that are overwhelmed with the process know it’s ok to help your kid. Especially those that are in multiple sports with multiple ap classes, and packed weekends staring at 11/1 deadlines. When do you expect your kid to work in it? Midnight to 2 am?

[Anonymous]

It's a really tough time of year for the seniors. Especially those with a ton of 11/1 deadlines!

We're trying to keep in mind that this is an exercise in building resilience. As stressful as it is, these kids will get through it and come out the other side knowing they can do/survive hard things. Just like midterm weeks and exam weeks in college.

When there's a deadline involved, it has always helps me to visualize myself the day after - feeling lighter and freer once the deadline is behind me. It's just a small mental reset, but I've been using it since college and it does seem to help me center myself and push through. Like the old saying, "This, too, shall pass," but with visuals - a little mental trick to put the moment of extreme stress into a larger timeline.

Again, I completely empathize. We're in a similar position here, including the fall sport. Ugh. Thankfully, that just wrapped up, and the rest of DC's app deadlines are 1/1 - 1/15 (with school deadlines of 12/8.)

GL to all!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is playing a fall sport, a club sport, is in 3 ap classes and volunteers on weekends, and is applying to a couple special programs with unique requirements in addition to the reach/target/ safety thing. She started the essays, but I’m finishing them for her to proofread. I’m handling the common app profile, fafsa, css, college board, and everything else that goes along with this process. The whole thing is very bureaucratic and it’s unrealistic to ask a hs senior to know how to navigate it.

Super lame.

Agreed. You’re finishing the essays? And doing the Common App? What the…

That’s fine to judge. I think paying for essay or college consultants is lame. I suspect what I’m doing is being considered by many. Just thought I’d throw it out there so those that are overwhelmed with the process know it’s ok to help your kid. Especially those that are in multiple sports with multiple ap classes, and packed weekends staring at 11/1 deadlines. When do you expect your kid to work in it? Midnight to 2 am?

I did it the first time. Worked out really really well. And no, we didn't pay for the private counselor like everyone else on here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid is playing a fall sport, a club sport, is in 3 ap classes and volunteers on weekends, and is applying to a couple special programs with unique requirements in addition to the reach/target/ safety thing. She started the essays, but I’m finishing them for her to proofread. I’m handling the common app profile, fafsa, css, college board, and everything else that goes along with this process. The whole thing is very bureaucratic and it’s unrealistic to ask a hs senior to know how to navigate it.

Super lame.

Agreed. You’re finishing the essays? And doing the Common App? What the…

Are you new to this world?

DP. Nope, neither of us are. Not ok at all to write their essays for them. If your kids can’t do that part, they’re either not cut out for the schools they’re applying to or they’re not cut out for the current schedule they have.

Or applying to colleges is a ridiculous process that is darn near a full time job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You guys need to help your kids out! Fall sports plus school plus 10+ early apps? Too much for 17 yo.

We helped. Helping isn’t a “handout”. Come on.
Both are thriving at T20.

Helped how, specifically? I’m happy to be a proofreader and offer suggestions m, but that’s the extent of it. Of course, my kid isn’t doing 10+ early apps. Maybe instead of helping them with all those apps, you should steer them towards a more manageable load in the first place.

Lots of great suggestions in this thread, including the Google research. Also look here.
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1235389.page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, should have had a low stats kid like mine. Plenty of steam.

At least he can play balll at NVCC if doesn’t apply to other colleges.

Nice.

[Anonymous]

My high stats kid ‘24 squeezed in some time to work on essays at the end of the day, before sports practice. High stats but typical average excellent with a couple B’s and great but not top SAT’s. Maybe they could have gotten into more highly ranked schools if I had helped with essays and the Common app (I did the FAFSA and CSS forms). Hopefully they felt a sense of personal ownership over the process.