This is a morbid question... but at your funeral
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Anonymous
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No funeral for me, either. I really don’t care for any of the rituals around death.
My mother felt the same way, and despite repeated attempts to get her to tell us what she wanted, always responded that she didn’t care and didn’t want anything but for her ashes to be returned to her home state. I don’t even care about my ashes. |
Anonymous
Love it! I want the Eagles played at my celebration of life. I also love how many have responded that they want to cremate. My growing up family is into cremation so it's what I have stated as my plan for when I die. Even if my kids decide to keep some of my ashes in a pot, that's OK. I just don't want to be planted in a cemetary where no one is going to visit after 2-3 years. And I have let them know that's what I want. No $20K coffin on display for two days then buried in the ground forever for me. My spouse comes from Burma and this community is very much into day long tributes, speeches, food, visitations, open caskets, and of course lots of Bible talk. I actually dread the day my MIL passes because I know it's going to be a big kerfluffle in the immediate sibling family and then trying to come up with something for the larger community to celebrate her. |
Anonymous
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I would never put my family through having to organize it and then go to it. I will be in an urn. The urn can be left where they burned me or ubered back to family.
I really don't care. |
Anonymous
| I plan to live to 100 or older so my guess is there may not be a lot of friends left. I just want to be cremated and call it a day. A life lived well is more than most people get so I’ll be fine just “peace-ing out”. |
Anonymous
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We all know death is inevitable and, for most, an emotional time. It shouldn't be morbid to talk about death or what someone's wishes are when they die. Why not not make it easier by planning for it? Even better, organize/pay for what you can beforehand.
I've experienced a lot of loss and it's SO much easier when there's been advance planning or at least discussions. We've now normalized it in my family of origin and with my kids (starting when they were teens because, yeah, they need to be a little mature). I definitely want a party with lots of color - no black! Take advantage of everyone being together. Take pictures! Laugh! Celebrate living life well even though it's a sad occasion. |
Anonymous
| My genetics are such that I might die quite young (my mom died at 48). In that case, the friends of my now tween and teen will show up in droves. If I get to be old, probably not a lot. |
Anonymous
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OP, are you wanting your death to be a popularity contest? The more people that show up...
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Anonymous
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The people who know you may want an opportunity to come together and celebrate you. If you think the number of attendees would be zero, then this isn't your problem. If you think that's the case, do the work yourself so your family doesn't have to.
Which is why lots of people, like my mom, plan their own funerals and interments. When my dad died, she had her name put next to his on the gravestone so it was all set to go. She picked her hymns. She told us to use the cheapest crematory around. We didn't have to plan much, except find a caterer for after the service, and she left millions so we weren't really stressed about that either. |
Anonymous
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I'll be dead and so I don't care if I am given a funeral or my dead body is thrown in the ocean.
I would rather have the party with food and drink with my friends when I am alive. |
Anonymous
| Hopefully I’ll get a good celebration! I’ve worked in two teaching jobs where I built a large network of community acquaintances. I would hope they’d turn out. I also have a huge and tight knit family but they are all local to each other but 6-8 hrs away. I don’t think they’d all be able to come here quickly so I’d bet my kids would just have a ceremony there too. |
Anonymous
UGH. So gross. Everyone will remember you as that person who had to make your goodbye into a PR stunt. Just no. |
Anonymous
| Even I won’t be there |
Anonymous
| I have few friends and very few relatives that I enjoy being around. I have my wife and two kids, and am not even from the area. I certainly don’t want a funeral, as they are wasteful. I’d prefer to not even be remembered because I haven’t done anything remarkable in life worth noting. |
Anonymous
| My goal will be for people to not even know I died until months later. |