Hope your first kid doesn't know they aren't good enough |
To the troll who is unhappy with the 2 children she has, I hope they disown you. |
Disagree. In my experience too much parent attention is not great for kids. Lots of special snowflakes out there who really struggle with the real world. Kids with 2+ siblings seem to be better adjusted in general. The helicopter parenting many people take on today is not good for kids. They are more anxious, insecure, self centered, and rigid. |
Disagree with you. Having 1 or 2 kids does not correlate with being a helicopter parent, damn fool. |
My sister helicopter parents her 3 kids. I have 2 children, one of whom boards. You don’t know what you are talking about at all. Keep your mouth shut. |
I work in an ES. Some children are positively feral. But it doesn’t seem to correlate with how many kids there are in the family.
But when they get older and the parents no longer dictate the entire family’s schedule, parents will have to divide and conquer activities. If you have more than 2 kids, you will NOT be able to have a parents at each game/competition/performance unless some of your children don’t do anything at all. |
I always wanted 3, and thats what happened. I was one of 3, so it was easy to picture. |
I kept agonizing over it so we went for the third. I’m pregnant and in early days. I’m nervous about it, but I’m also at peace now that I finally feel I know I’ll be done if this pregnancy works out, and possibly even if it doesn’t and I simply know I tried. |
All of these are completely rational reasons to stop at 2. I was in the same position. But I could not stop thinking about a third and felt I’d regret not trying. So we did. |
I sort of agree with this - my spouse is one of two and were incredibly coddled to a deficit. His sibling is kind but also one of the most self centered people I know. Kids from bigger families learn early that not everything revolves around them- obviously that also needs to happen in an appropriate way, but ultimately I think better for kids. That said there are tons of benefits to having two kids and parents should have the number that they can and want to manage. |
And I think kids who get no attention from parents are suffering. |
Yes, but three kids aren’t not getting attention. It’s not ten kids. They may not have parents breathing down their necks like parents of two are more likely to, and that’s not a bad thing. |
I thought we were done at 2. My husband sent me an article about how people over value the immediate term in making the decision and undervalue the long term. The article really made an impression and I realized that, for me, it was correct. We had a third, who is now 5, and it was definitely the right decision for us. (All kids were in my mid-30s and my fertility struggles were the reverse of those described here; several years and escalating interventions for #1 and then the next 2 were easy.) |
Put 2nd was a challenging infant,toddler, preschooler. He has been a fabulous kid post those stages, but hell no. We’ve also been fortunate with healthy kids. And we’ll be empty nesters when I am 51. |
I could have written this word for word. Hoping your pregnancy goes well! |