Can we afford private school?

[Anonymous]

Personally, I would not, at least for ES. I’d potentially plan on it for high school or 7-12.

Some questions to consider
Is $185k one income or two?
How much are you paying currently for daycare?
How much of the tuition is being paid by grandparents vs. financial aid?
If you have a SAHM, and they will definitely return to work after the baby enters K, then maybe? You will lose financial aid though. If the financial aid piece is small and the grandparents contribution large, you shouldn’t have a problem with the second warmer clearing the $30-$60k tuition.

We do it though for middle and high school on an HHI of about that amount for two kids, Catholic schools, and no grandparent help because both have special needs. We have $1.8m saved for retirement, two pensions, and a less expensive house. It’s very tight though.

[Anonymous]

You could send one to private and two to public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thank you for the honesty. What if we sent just one kid to private school, and the other two went to public school at least for K–6th grade?

That seems a bit unfair to the other kids, unless there is a serious learning issue (I mean serious!). The siblings will resent the one that gets the private school.

I'd suggest sending them all to public for K-6. See how it goes. You obviously think your K-6 is good, since you are willing to send 2 of your kids there. SO assuming you are not a troll (I think from this statement you just might be), send all 3 kids to public from K-6 and see where you are financially and with retirement and college savings at that point. Ask grandparents to contribute the $$$ they were willing to put towards private school towards college fund, or at least to save it for possible private MS/HS.

We really like the private school that the oldest got into and it is highly competitive. The logic behind sending the oldest to this private is that (1) turning it down now might doom our chances of sending any of the three there, ever, and (2) having a sibling there could give the other two kids an edge in the admissions process if they want to transfer there, as it is very difficult to enter after K when there are few spots available. I think our public ES is fine, but our public MS has a lot of issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We do it. 2 kids at $35K total. HHI less than 200K. We are still able to contribute to 529s and retirement. We simply cut other expenses. (There won’t be any fancy trips and we run our cars into the ground.)

But we find it worth it. The private is much stronger than our public, and our children are progressing well.

Teach me your ways! It sounds like we have a similar lifestyle, though. (Our car is ancient, and we don't take vacation trips).

[Anonymous]

Are grandparents committed to that level of support for all three for k-12?

One option is to do it for kid #1 for a few years and see where you are income-wise and FA-wise. If your income hasn’t gone to “3 kids in private” levels (in many places that’s twice what you’re making now) then move to a district where you would be happy with the public option for k-12 before kid #2 starts K.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thank you for the honesty. What if we sent just one kid to private school, and the other two went to public school at least for K–6th grade?

That seems a bit unfair to the other kids, unless there is a serious learning issue (I mean serious!). The siblings will resent the one that gets the private school.

I'd suggest sending them all to public for K-6. See how it goes. You obviously think your K-6 is good, since you are willing to send 2 of your kids there. SO assuming you are not a troll (I think from this statement you just might be), send all 3 kids to public from K-6 and see where you are financially and with retirement and college savings at that point. Ask grandparents to contribute the $$$ they were willing to put towards private school towards college fund, or at least to save it for possible private MS/HS.

We really like the private school that the oldest got into and it is highly competitive. The logic behind sending the oldest to this private is that (1) turning it down now might doom our chances of sending any of the three there, ever, and (2) having a sibling there could give the other two kids an edge in the admissions process if they want to transfer there, as it is very difficult to enter after K when there are few spots available. I think our public ES is fine, but our public MS has a lot of issues.

If you really want this, you need to get serious about being super-frugal and shoveling money into a 529 plan starting today. And one or both of you needs to increase earnings, stat. You definitely cannot send all three unless you're willing to sacrifice pretty much everything else.

[Anonymous]

Not only is it a no, it’s an emphatic no since you work in academia. The potential upward trajectory doesn’t sound significant enough. And as everyone else already mentioned, expect tuition to rise, possibly much faster than general inflation. As an example, I have a kid in private school. When he started 6 years ago, the K tuition was about 26k. It is now 35k.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also I'm not actually sure I want to retire—I work in an academia-type field where many don't. I have colleagues in their 80s who love it.

An academia-type field where no one retires and you think your HHI is on an upward trajectory strong enough to support 60k/year in education costs alone in 10 years. This is magical thinking. You cannot afford this, and if you try to do it anyway you'll be explaining to your high school students that there is no college savings for them because you really didn't want to leave the grandparents' generous offer to fund part of private school on the table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thank you for the honesty. What if we sent just one kid to private school, and the other two went to public school at least for K–6th grade?

Sophie’s Choice?

[Anonymous]

Send the first one to private and see how it goes and if your income goes up. When it's time for the next one to start, evaluate then. If it doesn't make sense to send both kids, then both transfer to public. Sounds like you are only outlaying $10k for a few years until you have some time to make that next decision.

[Anonymous]

We do it for one kid on same income as you and same cost.
We couldn’t do it for 3 kids and we can’t do it for HS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Private school cost after aid and grandparent contributions is $10k per year per kid for K-6; will double to $20k for grades 7-12.

Three kids. Gross HHI of $185k on upward trajectory. Mortgage costs $30k per year. No car loans or other major expenses.

So, I'm a huge advocate of public school plus 2x / week weekly tutoring. We pay $175 / hr for our tutoring (he's amazing! - massive test score increases and progress for my kid), and we probably see him 30 weeks out of the year. Probably comes out to close to $10k / year (maybe get Grandparents to pay for this instead and save yourself the $40k / year associated with private school).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would they all go to the school right now, or are some younger?

If it's all of them, on $185K, no way.

+1

Absolutely no way! Redirect the $$$ for private school towards saving for college. Because if you are on the "Upward trajectory" you will be in the sweet spot many call "the donut hole" or higher. You won't get much for college. And by the time your kids attend college, in-state will be $50-60K/year per kid. You will need $600K minimum to send all 3 kids to college, possibly much more.

There is no way you can pay for private K-12 and still save for college.

This is so true.

I pulled my kid out of private in middle school so I could stockpile savings while he was in high school. We are a full pay public college family. We were making what you were making when we let other people talk us into private.

It was the worst financial mistake of our adult lives.

If you can’t afford the full COA, the schools will incentivize you to make bad financial decisions to qualify for aid or the yearly COA will outrun your income as your aid dries up.

[Anonymous]

If you want to send them to private, send them all to private. Sending only one to private and the others to public is unfair. That’s bad parenting. Your kids will hate you for that. Don’t destroy your family.

[Anonymous]

Send one to private only if the child needs it, not you. This private is all for you and/or for grandparents.
My elementary school kid has as much in assets as you do.
I'm just as excited to have their assets grow as you are sending your child to private. What would your child choose?
I'd invest the money for all three and re-evaluate after elementary.