I feel a bit liberated wearing the hijab lately

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she’s ugly, fat, doesn’t wash her hair.

Just cover it up with hijab. Easy breezy.

Not necessarily. May be gorgeous and tired of unwanted attention.

[Anonymous]

I really feel like being empowered is the ability to do anything that you want and wear what you want regardless of what others think.

I’m very attractive and dress sharply. I never feel like men are looking at me lewdly or like soft porn. The men I’m surrounded with are kind, helpful and good men. I’m smart and respected at work. I think it’s demeaning of men when you think they only want one thing. It devalues them and also devalues women. I wear a wedding ring so that’s helpful in men not trying to date me.

I don’t see how putting your hair in a scarf averts gaze. I’m sure it makes it easier to dress. I wear buns often for the same purpose.

[Anonymous]

I've many friends who put it on then took it off depending on what social circle or phase of self discovery they were in, even though families didn't care either way. Some just got tired of wearing it. Ones who wear it for their personal believe or because of family pressure, do regularly wear it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really feel like being empowered is the ability to do anything that you want and wear what you want regardless of what others think.

I’m very attractive and dress sharply. I never feel like men are looking at me lewdly or like soft porn. The men I’m surrounded with are kind, helpful and good men. I’m smart and respected at work. I think it’s demeaning of men when you think they only want one thing. It devalues them and also devalues women. I wear a wedding ring so that’s helpful in men not trying to date me.

I don’t see how putting your hair in a scarf averts gaze. I’m sure it makes it easier to dress. I wear buns often for the same purpose.

And op has a choice. I missed the part where she does it to get less attention from men. Seems she does it to simplify her life. Perhaps she doesn't care about looking sharp or doesn't want to invest the time or money into it anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really feel like being empowered is the ability to do anything that you want and wear what you want regardless of what others think.

I’m very attractive and dress sharply. I never feel like men are looking at me lewdly or like soft porn. The men I’m surrounded with are kind, helpful and good men. I’m smart and respected at work. I think it’s demeaning of men when you think they only want one thing. It devalues them and also devalues women. I wear a wedding ring so that’s helpful in men not trying to date me.

I don’t see how putting your hair in a scarf averts gaze. I’m sure it makes it easier to dress. I wear buns often for the same purpose.

Why did she have to chime in with that?

[Anonymous]

Anyone can wear a scarf over their head any time they want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she’s ugly, fat, doesn’t wash her hair.

Just cover it up with a hijab. Easy breezy.

Not necessarily. May be gorgeous and tired of unwanted attention.

Op here. I'm not gorgeous but I do get attention both ways. I'm thin. I have a baby face and full eyebrows. I had a unibrow when I was young The neighborhood I live in has some Muslim women who wear hijab and lots of Indian immigrants. There are white Americans as well. I do not have sons and my family or husband doesn't care. They don't want to force anything and believe we should do what we feel is best. South Asian Muslims tend to be more relaxed about covering their hair. It's important to cover your chest though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she’s ugly, fat, doesn’t wash her hair.

Just cover it up with hijab. Easy breezy.

Not necessarily. May be gorgeous and tired of unwanted attention.

Hijab would cover hair but not looks or weight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she’s ugly, fat, doesn’t wash her hair.

Just cover it up with a hijab. Easy breezy.

Not necessarily. May be gorgeous and tired of unwanted attention.

Op here. I'm not gorgeous but I do get attention both ways. I'm thin. I have a baby face and full eyebrows. I had a unibrow when I was young The neighborhood I live in has some Muslim women who wear hijab and lots of Indian immigrants. There are white Americans as well. I do not have sons and my family or husband doesn't care. They don't want to force anything and believe we should do what we feel is best. South Asian Muslims tend to be more relaxed about covering their hair. It's important to cover your chest though.

Op here. Sorry meant to write I have sons, not daughters. I think it would be harder if I had a daughter because she may feel pressure to wear a hijab if I wear it. I never had pressure growing up because my mom passed away and my father didn't give his opinion. His opinion was always I should do what I feel is right in my heart regarding hijab. I wasn't allowed to wear belly shirts or mini skirts but I can't remember wanting to do that. I think since I've always been thin I look good even when dressing modestly. That probably sounds vain but unless you wear super loose clothes you can see someone's body shape.

[Anonymous]

A hijab doesn't avert male gaze, it actually frames the face and make it center of attention. A lot of hijabi women wear lots of makeup and western fitted clothing so unless its to make a political statement, its doesn't serve it's intended purpose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like she’s ugly, fat, doesn’t wash her hair.

Just cover it up with hijab. Easy breezy.

Not necessarily. May be gorgeous and tired of unwanted attention.

The hijab would cover hair but not looks or weight.

Op here. A hijab is more than covering your hair. It means to dress modestly and that can mean different things... It can hide weight to some extent. When I wear traditional South Asian clothing I feel like my weight appears bigger but wearing a Middle Eastern abaya will make most look thinner. Clothing can change how your body looks so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I moved to a new state recently and decided to start wearing a hijab (covering my hair). When you think of the hijab, you probably don’t think “political”. Or “independent”. Or “empowered”. Feminist? In a society where our value seems to be based on looks I think covering your hair and dressing modest can be an alterative to avoid this. Woman/sex combination is everywhere.. especially instagram.. it's like soft porn. Everywhere it seems there are ads for enhancing your ass... and lots of people have become obsessed with taking photos of themselves.. Wearing hijab is not the only way to express my feelings and frustrations; but knowing that our interpretation of liberal culture embraces, if not encourages, uncovering, covering up is a way to reject that. I do not believe that the hair in itself is that important; this is not about protection from men’s lusts. It is me telling the world that my femininity is not available for public consumption. I am taking control of it, and I don’t want to be part of a system that reduces and demeans women. I really believe that a non-Muslim woman could do this if she chose to. I know longer worry about face wrinkles on my forehead because the scarf covers them or my hair as much. I still color my hair and get haircuts but I don't worry about styling it everyday. I speak as a woman who just happens to come from the Islamic faith. I also noticed I worry less about my clothing.

You do you. No need to defend, explain or upsell your actions. It has to make sense to you. Wear it with confidence and if it stops making sense to you, take it off without any guilt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A hijab doesn't avert male gaze, it actually frames the face and make it center of attention. A lot of hijabi women wear lots of makeup and western fitted clothing so unless its to make a political statement, its doesn't serve it's intended purpose.

It's a hair accessory.. Can be cultural.. Fashion choice... Who cares? Complaining about it is just as bad as making fun of someone's appearance. Would you make fun of the way Indian Americans dress? It's the same thing. Respect that people have different cultures and not everyone wants to dress Western.

[Anonymous]

So happy for you, OP! I wish I could wear one. It is a beautiful tradition.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like she doesn't like styling her hair or has bad hair days. Maybe looks better than blunt bangs which hide forehead wrinkles.