Seven year old wants to show her midriff.

[Anonymous]

My own kid is a bit younger but I know two 3rd graders who are obsessed with crop tops. Like OP has said, it's not about being sexy or attracting boys (they could care less), there is just something about the look that they like. One of them is allowed to wear them if she buys them with her own allowance money, which means she has one such shirt and wears it all the time except to school where she has a uniform. The parents despair a bit but they've set their boundary and are holding it -- she has the one shirt and she's going to wear it into the ground. I know that shirt is "in the wash" a lot, lol.

The other one has severe midriff tops bought for her during a shopping trip with her grandmother (Nana will give GD anything she asks for, it is her Nana strategy for being loved). I am aware that these shirts are currently the subject of a lot of family squabbles, and the girl's mother would very much like to confiscate them but there is disagreement with her father, who thinks they are fine if only worn at home (but is also not involved in the arguments when their DD wants to wear them outside the house). It has been quite the drama.

I think in the end, these issues will hasten the time when the girls' mothers sit them down to explain the tricky aspect of being a woman where you are unfairly judged for what you wear all the time, and even judged for how someone else (who is not you nor the person judging you) might feel about what you are wearing. It sucks. I hope my own DD somehow skips on this interest in bare midriffs and I can punt on this misery a little longer, until MS. Ugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The oversexualization and policing of girls bodies so gross.

I let my 9yo wear what she wants. Including crop tops.

I have a 7 yr old and she’s wanted to show her belly a bit and while I can’t say that I’m totally supportive, I don’t think it’s THAT big of a deal. we don’t buy actual crop tops but she bunches her baggy t shirts and ties them in a hair band or scrunchy (anyone remember those pull-through plastic things that achieved that look in 1993?). This can kind of be adjusted up or down and we don’t let her go full belly at school. I am kind of surprised by the responses to the thread, I thought there would be more people saying to let her.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the posters to tell her this is a trend for adult women. I have seen a few girls that age around in crop tops. Weirdly the only girls who’s parents seem to allow this are the fat girls, which leads me to believe only permissive parents allow their 7 year olds to wear a crop top.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with the posters to tell her this is a trend for adult women. I have seen a few girls that age around in crop tops. Weirdly the only girls who’s parents seem to allow this are the fat girls, which leads me to believe only permissive parents allow their 7 year olds to wear a crop top.

What?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We've had young women apply for front office administrative assistant jobs in Daisy Dukes and low cut tops. We did not hire those applicants.

I would say yes to a crop top on an ocean front beach setting. I'd say no to everywhere else.

You are not doing your daughters any favors by having them dress like "professional women" who work on Only Fans or on the streets.

There is appropriate dress for different settings.

+1 at the beach, sure. In school or at work, no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with the posters to tell her this is a trend for adult women. I have seen a few girls that age around in crop tops. Weirdly the only girls who’s parents seem to allow this are the fat girls, which leads me to believe only permissive parents allow their 7 year olds to wear a crop top.

What?

They clearly let their daughters eat and wear whatever they want all the time without paying any attention to what they're doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The oversexualization and policing of girls bodies so gross.

I let my 9yo wear what she wants. Including crop tops.

I have a 7 yr old and she’s wanted to show her belly a bit and while I can’t say that I’m totally supportive, I don’t think it’s THAT big of a deal. we don’t buy actual crop tops but she bunches her baggy t shirts and ties them in a hair band or scrunchy (anyone remember those pull-through plastic things that achieved that look in 1993?). This can kind of be adjusted up or down and we don’t let her go full belly at school. I am kind of surprised by the responses to the thread, I thought there would be more people saying to let her.

there are different degrees of showing the midriff. A little bit is nbd, but some of those shirts are more like sports bras. That's a no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The oversexualization and policing of girls bodies so gross.

I let my 9yo wear what she wants. Including crop tops.

Maybe you should be asking why your daughter is so drawn to wearing those styles instead of saying people are sexualizing children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter, seeing the trend in teen girls, now wants to show her midriff. I'm not a fan of this trend or anything that feels like objectifying. At the same time, I want her to be comfortable and happy in what she's wearing. Clearly this isn't about boy attention because she's not into them yet (that would be an easier conversation to have if that were the reason). I'm excited about the cold weather coming, maybe that will help, for now. Any similar experiences with your daughters and how you approached it?

Your 7 year old has a job? Living independently and paying for herself? No? Then you tell her that this will not fly.

Also, can you take some cues from moms of other cultures and give her one tight slap?

And her showing midriff may not be to attract the attention of boys but it sure will give a show to the pedophiles without paying the OnlyFans fees. You need to spend more time with her and guide her into activities that will be conducive for her future. Be a parent and not her "friend".

WWP!!

[Anonymous]

I'd laugh, say no, and not give it another thought. Why is this such a big deal that it needs to be posted here? With kids, I seem to make a thousand decisions and judgment calls each day - how do you get through that without posting each issue here?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with the posters to tell her this is a trend for adult women. I have seen a few girls that age around in crop tops. Weirdly the only girls who’s parents seem to allow this are the fat girls, which leads me to believe only permissive parents allow their 7 year olds to wear a crop top.

OMG! I did not make the connection before but you are so right!!

Honey Boo Boo kinds of girls and their chub is just hanging out!! Google it.

[Anonymous]

[imghttps://i.pinimg.com/1200x/8e/64/22/8e642264616c976a19d6b5b54bf6fe6e.jpg[/img]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

[Anonymous]

I think I’d play this like makeup - for older girls, okay to experiment with at home. But not appropriate for school, play dates etc.

I think it’s okay to say “it’s complicated and I can’t explain perfectly why I’m not allowing it. I promise to keep thinking about it with an open mind. For now, you have to just live with my decision even if you think I’m wrong.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd laugh, say no, and not give it another thought. Why is this such a big deal that it needs to be posted here? With kids, I seem to make a thousand decisions and judgment calls each day - how do you get through that without posting each issue here?

Well obviously it depends on how big a deal it is to this kid. It sounds like it’s an ongoing conversation, not a “can we stop for ice cream” type request.