Tradeoffs: money, exciting work, crappy commute

[Anonymous]

We currently live very close to my husband's job in Montgomery County (I-270 corridor). He has a sweet commute and I have a crappy one to downtown DC, but we chose to live where we do mainly for the low housing prices. (And also, to be honest, because I realized I was never going to convince him to move closer to DC.)

Lately he has been applying to a bunch of jobs in NoVa, which would mean a big pay increase (50% or more increase) and greater intellectual engagement. I'm pretty confident he can get one of these jobs and he seems pretty set on doing so. My worry is that he's going to freaking hate the commute and it's going to wear on him. I don't think he really understands this because he's had it easy for so long.

I've told him how I feel, so I'm now going to shut up and let him do what he wants (and reap the financial benefits, ha!), but I would love to hear if any of you either (a) make a similar commute, or (b) have made the commuting trade off, either happily or not.

Thanks!

[Anonymous]

A 50% raise is really substantial.. I'd be willing to vigorously rub a rusty brillo pad on my balls for that kind of money.

But yes, a commute will drain heavily. So much of it will depend on his hours though, my commute could be 45+ minutes each way but because my office is flexible, I can come in late or leave early (or both) and I'm able to turn it into 20 minutes.

I used to work a job that had me going 1 hour each way, and working long hours, and I burned out in 8 months. My dad happened to call me and asked me how the weather was, and I realized I didnt have a bloody clue because I left the house when it was dark and I got home when it was dark. I quit that day.

My 2 cents: You are right, he's probably going to be miserable with it. Its easy to discount it, and you'll quickly grow accustomed to the larger paycheck, but the daily grind will remind you every day, twice a day, of your decision.

Then again, for a 50% pay increase, I'd do it, if for no other reason than to set that as the new bar, then move on again in a year or two.

[Anonymous]

Problem is moving on makes you a job hopper. As someone who had a ling commute for more money, I vote nay. The commute was exhausting and I felt like most of my time was spent on it-like a second job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Problem is moving on makes you a job hopper. As someone who had a ling commute for more money, I vote nay. The commute was exhausting and I felt like most of my time was spent on it-like a second job.

You can get past the job hopper part. I've had 5 jobs in 10 years. You just need to know how to talk to it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Problem is moving on makes you a job hopper. As someone who had a ling commute for more money, I vote nay. The commute was exhausting and I felt like most of my time was spent on it-like a second job.

You can get past the job hopper part. I've had 5 jobs in 10 years. You just need to know how to talk to it.

I don't think it's an issue either, especially if you stay with the new job! OP, why aren't you also considering moving?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Problem is moving on makes you a job hopper. As someone who had a ling commute for more money, I vote nay. The commute was exhausting and I felt like most of my time was spent on it-like a second job.

You can get past the job hopper part. I've had 5 jobs in 10 years. You just need to know how to talk to it.

I don't think it's an issue either, especially if you stay with the new job! OP, why aren't you also considering moving?

+1. NoVA isn't going to be cheaper than Rockville most likely, but you could find something along the soon-to-be silver line in Reston or Herndon that might make both commutes more bearable?

[Anonymous]

OP, why aren't you also considering moving?

OP here: We just bought our house last year. I tried very hard at the time to get my husband to pin down where he wanted to work for the foreseeable future. He was pretty set on Maryland (and had already worked there for ~6 years). I have been looking for jobs closer to home so my commute would suck less. Moving to NoVa wouldn't do me any good in terms of commute I expect, even with the silver line. Plus, we really like our house/neighborhood/town.

If we did move, it wouldn't be any time soon.