Tottering on the precipice -- advice?

[Anonymous]

Sales are down and my co is likely to have layoffs in the first quarter. They transferred me here from the West Coast two years ago when sales were booming. Now they are pushing out older executives like me. I'm 51. I've networked like crazy, but jobs at my level are scarce in my field, which is contracting. I've been rejected for several lower-level jobs because I'm overqualified (they told me this).

Six months ago, my co moved me to a job with fewer responsibilities in an effort to get me to quit. They did this to my boss and several others. I can't quit because I'm my family's sole income even though I hate this job.

I'm at a dead end. What do I do now? Are there out placement firms that can help? Counseling? Any recommendations? I'm scared and depressed, and worried I'll be out in the cold if I don't find something soon.

TIA.

[Anonymous]

What kind of sales are you in?

Do you look young for 51?

Any chance you can move back west or are you willing to move to another local? There are many folks out there who commute to their jobs in another state so as to not uproot their family - just a thought.

Out placement and counseling is all BS in IMHO. Its not going to move the dial for you at all. time to get creative though.

[Anonymous]

Please, PP. Tell me, what do you mean by "get creative"?

I've networked in the greater DC area and used all my East Coast contacts. Everyone has been nice, several people have recommended me for jobs, most of the jobs are below my current level or in a related field for which I have excellent skills but no direct experience. I had a lot of interviews and was a finalist for one position, but in the end, someone else got the job. I'm still waiting for two jobs at universities, but they can take six months or so to get approved, and I don't know if I'll be employed that long.

I do look young for 51, but I don't dye my hair because it's very dark brown, and dark hair dyes are linked to lymphoma. My hair is salt and pepper now, which I know makes me look older. I'll dye it if necessary.

I'm not in sales. But the company made a miscalculation (people above me), so the project I was brought out here to work on has turned out to be huge disappointment. Sales in other parts of the company are down due to the still sluggish economy.

I was told that in networking, you only get to ask once. A lot of people have been very helpful to me, so I don't feel I can go back to them. I've seen postings for jobs that sound interesting, but at my level, I don't think anyone is going to look at my resume if it comes in without the recommendation of someone they know.

I really feel stuck. I'm still networking, but it's gotten to the point that people are recommending that I talk to people I already met with.

BTW, I was dreading going to work today. So far, I'm still employed, but the day is not over yet.

All suggestions welcome. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm sorry for your situation. I am also 51 and dye my hair. FWIW, I was recently hired into a new job and most of my coworkers are a lot younger than me. I've been told I look younger than my age, and I try to dress and act youngish. Maybe this has helped me, I don't know?

Can you start your own business? Is moving to another locale an option?

Good luck to you.

[Anonymous]

What about headhunters?

[Anonymous]

What about a career change? Lots of associations in the metro DC area. Maybe join ASAE?

http://www.asaecenter.org/

[Anonymous]

I've contacted headhunters. One offered me an interview for a job on the West Coast, but I turned it down. I told him I need to stay on the East Coast, but he says he's had nothing that would be a fit for me here.

Anyone find a job through a headhunter? How often do I need to bug them? I send emails to several headhunters about once a month, but nothing has come of that so far.

I get emails from ASAE for jobs posted on their website . The jobs pay a fraction of what I make now. And without a contact, I don't see much point in filing an application online. I've never received a response, so that seems like a waste of time.

I'm not ready to go out on my own. I have not been here long enough to build up a client list. I'm working on it, but I won't be able to make a living for a few years.

[Anonymous]

When you say that your job is in contracting, do you mean federal government contracts? What aspects of contracting do you handle? This may help in terms of people's suggestions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm sorry for your situation. I am also 51 and dye my hair. FWIW, I was recently hired into a new job and most of my coworkers are a lot younger than me. I've been told I look younger than my age, and I try to dress and act youngish. Maybe this has helped me, I don't know?

Can you start your own business? Is moving to another locale an option?

Good luck to you.

How did you find a new job at 51? Do you think your age made a difference when you were looking? Did you decide to dye your hair before looking for a new job?

I'm not sure how to hide my age. My experience is what I have to sell. I've held a number of positions at my company, each with increasing responsibility (until now!). Anyone looking at my resume could guess at my age. I deleted the years I graduated from college and grad school, and I deleted a few of my earliest jobs.

But isn't a lack of a graduation date on a resume a sure sign that someone's trying to hide their age?

Moving is a possibility as long as it's on the East Coast, but again, without contacts, I'm not sure how to go about that. I have a few contacts in New York, but many are in the same predicament I am. None is in a position to help me, alas. It's very hard to network in other cities. Here, at least I can meet people for lunch or coffee, but I can't run off to Boston or Philly to grab a drink after work.

What am I missing here? I feel like I've fallen down a hole. Or has my age caught up with me?

[Anonymous]

51 yo PP here. My situation is probably different than your's. I changed careers in my 40's and just got my first "real" job since graduating with my Phd. It's more of an entry-level job, but I have the ability to supplement my salary through private practice (I'm a psychologist). It sounds like you've been earning a good deal of money for some time, so finding another comparable job may be more difficult in your situation.

Regarding age factors, I did feel (and occasionally still do feel) that my age is a strike against me. Other times I think my life experience and maturity is viewed as an asset. I started coloring my hair in my 40s, before I was looking for work. However, I did buy a younger, somewhat "hipper" wardrobe. This was partly to look younger and partly because my new field is more casual than my prior career as a lawyer. Anyone looking at my resume can guess my age, but I think appearing youthful still gives me a psychological edge when interacting with professional peers.

What about starting your own business? I know this can be very difficult, but with a background in contracting I wonder if this would be a good fit? Could you qualify for a small business loan?

Anyway, obviously I am not in your shoes so can't know what will work for you. I would just say that 51 isn't old, so don't lose heart! I think there are opportunities out there and doubt that age is the primary factor slowing down your progress. It sounds like your field is just contracting right now, and if this is the case, can you make a more lateral move to another field? I imagine many of your skills are transferrable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When you say that your job is in contracting, do you mean federal government contracts? What aspects of contracting do you handle? This may help in terms of people's suggestions.

Sorry, I wasn't clear. My industry is shrinking. (I'm not in contracting.) There are fewer jobs every year. It's not academia, but similar in terms of job prospects. My skills are transferable, and I'm looking in related fields. But the market is so tight right now that employers often want (and are able to find) someone who is doing the exact job for just about any position.

I feel tapped out right now. Exhausted by this relentless search and puzzled by my inability to find an acceptable job. I have an Ivy degree, which used to impress people. But now it seems worthless.

I was wondering if counseling would help, but I don't want to waste money if it's just some HR person telling me to network and rewrite my resume. Hair dye would be cheaper.

[Anonymous]

I get the privacy concerns but can't really advise without knowing what is your field. Saying the job prospects are similar to academia doesn't convey any info. You could at least name the related fields.

I was in construction but got a new job in a related field (federal) at age 53. I would not dream of going grey until retirement, plus I have a teenager and would hate for people to mistake me for his granny. So I've been dying to medium brown for nearly 20 years and so far no lymphoma. You could always go lighter, doesn't have to match your own hair color. And exercise, get in shape to feel great about yourself. Be willing to take a paycut and downsize your expenses so you don't have to do a job you hate.

I would suggest you apply for jobs in government. There is a huge array of fields and though jobs are few they do exist. Go to USAJOBS.gov for example, that's how I found mine. At least to see what's possible.

[Anonymous]

Agree with pp, really hard to give advice without more details.

I will also say you may have to be prepared to take a pay cut. If your lifestyle won't allow for it, you need to take control of expenses now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Agree with pp, really hard to give advice without more details.

I will also say you may have to be prepared to take a pay cut. If your lifestyle won't allow for it, you need to take control of expenses now.

+1

ASAE has great leads for executive level positions but it sounds like you are currently in the $350K+ salary range and you will likely need to take a (perhaps significant) pay cut.

[Anonymous]

OP, you do sound as if you are depressed. You've asked for suggestions yet you've rejected every suggestion anyone has made - this is not intended to be a criticism, am just pointing out something which you may not have realized because that is a symptom of depression - you think it's all hopeless. I think priority number one should be talking to someone/taking an online questionnaire to see if you're depressed. It's very difficult to make decisions and take action if you are depressed and that would explain your rejection of all the useful suggestions people are giving you. Consider it and treat the depression first so that you can then be ready to deal with next steps in your career with a clear head.