Online dating - should I reach out or wait?

[Anonymous]

It's better to send a text than sit around fretting about whether he is interested.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I matched with a guy and we messaged for a bit, but then he stopped responding to my last message. Later, he reached out to apologize, saying he’d gotten busy. I saw the message but wasn’t sure if I wanted to continue the conversation, though I didn’t unmatch—so I guess part of me was still interested.

He followed up again with a really nice voice message, which won me over. We messaged a bit and had a video call. We talked about meeting in person, and I said I’d share my phone number on the app. I did and he replied with his number, which I found odd, since he already had mine. Why not just text me?

Anyway, I mentioned that I appreciated how busy he is, adding that my time is limited too—but I didn’t mean to suggest I didn’t want to hear from him soon.

Now I’m wondering: should I text him? I don’t want to seem desperate or like I’ll be the one initiating everything. I want a man who’s willing to pursue me.

Thoughts?

You sound like the type that wants to "unmatch" first so you can try to save face etc.

He should avoid you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I matched with a guy and we messaged for a bit, but then he stopped responding to my last message. Later, he reached out to apologize, saying he’d gotten busy. I saw the message but wasn’t sure if I wanted to continue the conversation, though I didn’t unmatch—so I guess part of me was still interested.

He followed up again with a really nice voice message, which won me over. We messaged a bit and had a video call. We talked about meeting in person, and I said I’d share my phone number on the app. I did and he replied with his number, which I found odd, since he already had mine. Why not just text me?

Anyway, I mentioned that I appreciated how busy he is, adding that my time is limited too—but I didn’t mean to suggest I didn’t want to hear from him soon.

Now I’m wondering: should I text him? I don’t want to seem desperate or like I’ll be the one initiating everything. I want a man who’s willing to pursue me.

Thoughts?

You sound like the type that wants to "unmatch" first so you can try to save face etc.

He should avoid you.

Save face? I haven’t met the guy and unless a date is arranged I will probably never encounter this person in my life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He is not into you. has other dates, and you might be a back up plann.

This is the answer. He probably has other dates lined up.

When people are on line dating they have a lot of men or women in different stages of the pipeline.

Don't spend a lot of time back and forth. If the guy does not make a move to ask you out then move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I matched with a guy and we messaged for a bit, but then he stopped responding to my last message. Later, he reached out to apologize, saying he’d gotten busy. I saw the message but wasn’t sure if I wanted to continue the conversation, though I didn’t unmatch—so I guess part of me was still interested.

He followed up again with a really nice voice message, which won me over. We messaged a bit and had a video call. We talked about meeting in person, and I said I’d share my phone number on the app. I did and he replied with his number, which I found odd, since he already had mine. Why not just text me?

Anyway, I mentioned that I appreciated how busy he is, adding that my time is limited too—but I didn’t mean to suggest I didn’t want to hear from him soon.

Now I’m wondering: should I text him? I don’t want to seem desperate or like I’ll be the one initiating everything. I want a man who’s willing to pursue me.

Thoughts?

You sound like the type that wants to "unmatch" first so you can try to save face etc.

He should avoid you.

Save face? I haven’t met the guy and unless a date is arranged I will probably never encounter this person in my life.

So why are you leading him on then?