What private schools have the best cultures for parents becoming friends?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
We're absolutely prioritizing the best fit for our kiddos. So please don't worry about that.

But many schools would seem to fit the bill. So now, we're looking for the best place for our family.

Anybody who refers to their children as kiddos and also cares enough about making friends with other parents to post this is doubly pathetic and no one will want to be your friend so you’re going to have to look really hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you’re interested in Catholic schools, there’s definitely a lot of family and parent events that make it easy to make friends. Small schools mean you get to know everyone’s parents. We have made several good friends through our kids’ K-8 Catholic school and feel like we have a real community there.

+1. I attended Catholic schools from elementary through college and my oldest is at a Catholic high school. In general, I think Catholic schools do a great job of fostering a sense of community. There are a lot of events for parents, opportunities to get involved, etc. Small k-8s generally do an excellent job of this, but I’ve also found it to be the case even at the HS level. I also found a good sense of community at my kids’ small (not Catholic) elementary that had a lot of family events, where kids played on the same rec teams and participated in after school activities, etc. So, those are the kinds of things I would look for, OP. A good sense of community and opportunities to meet other parents generally leads to making friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you’re interested in Catholic schools, there’s definitely a lot of family and parent events that make it easy to make friends. Small schools mean you get to know everyone’s parents. We have made several good friends through our kids’ K-8 Catholic school and feel like we have a real community there.

+1. I attended Catholic schools from elementary through college and my oldest is at a Catholic high school. In general, I think Catholic schools do a great job of fostering a sense of community. There are a lot of events for parents, opportunities to get involved, etc. Small k-8s generally do an excellent job of this, but I’ve also found it to be the case even at the HS level. I also found a good sense of community at my kids’ small (not Catholic) elementary that had a lot of family events, where kids played on the same rec teams and participated in after school activities, etc. So, those are the kinds of things I would look for, OP. A good sense of community and opportunities to meet other parents generally leads to making friends.

+2. We love our Catholic K-8. It truly feels like an extended family where everyone looks out for and takes care of one other. The school and parish hold fun events for parents and kids throughout the year and the families are involved and inclusive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why can’t you focus on making friends outside of your child’s school? Real friends.

It’s best to think of parents as your child’s school the same way you would treat coworkers at your job.

I am sorry there is nothing wrong in looking for friends. It isn't social climbing you are looking for a community for your child. It really does help if you end up liking the parents and becoming friends. In the long run it helps if your child is feeling excluded or doesn't have a friend group, if you have parent friends, you can always reach out to them to have them included.

[Anonymous]

OP here: Thank you to the prior poster.

We live in a neighborhood where most parents send their kids to 15+ different private schools, so many of the kids’ neighborhood friends peter out (it seems) by MS.

Wouldn’t it be nice to find a school where parent friendships are common and whose family friendships help keep the families in touch after the children graduate?

Please recommend those schools! Not looking for cliquey schools.

[Anonymous]

Norwood! We've made a lot of friends in both of our kid's grades (and in other grades too) because the parents tend to be kind, interesting, involved people. It's been a huge benefit to our family to have this community.

And to PP above, I do consider these "real" friends. If we had met some other way, we'd be friends!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
We're absolutely prioritizing the best fit for our kiddos. So please don't worry about that.

But many schools would seem to fit the bill. So now, we're looking for the best place for our family.

Anybody who refers to their children as kiddos and also cares enough about making friends with other parents to post this is doubly pathetic and no one will want to be your friend so you’re going to have to look really hard.

good point. you can say you are prioritizing your son/daughter all you like, but the fact that you are asking this question means that you are using the school as a means to advance your own social life, which seems a bit off. The school choice should be entirely about the students, and then the parents do their best to navigate the social scene once you get there.

[Anonymous]

I have been extremely surprised by how nice the parent community is at Bullis. I was nervous that it would be mostly social climbing snobs. Sure, there are a few of them, but I have made so many wonderful friends and really enjoy the parent community.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Any of them with an elementary school. That's where/when the connections happen.

By middle school, parents have their people and are tired of spending tons of time at school volunteering. And forget about HS.

This.

[Anonymous]

Staff and handfuls of parents at Visi have been wonderful. Some definite mom cliques that are carried through into the student body. Not to say that these people would ever be rude to your face, they just don't seem extremely open to new people. Gonzaga=almost uniformly wonderful and welcoming parents, to the point that we talk about it and find it a little startling.

[Anonymous]

If you kids are just starting school, I recommend a school that has a pre-k program. That way you can meet people that will be around until 8th grade or even high school.

[Anonymous]

My experience from several private schools is that people are polite but the relationships between parents are mostly shallow. So while you can make friends have low expectations, and you might be positively surprised.

[Anonymous]

I am shocked to this day how great the families were in my child’s class. Kind, loyal, willing to give the shirts of their back with both time and their resources. Moms and dads. My kid has an extended family for life now and I could not be happier. Had zero expectations but even had I imagined a great outcome reality still exceeded it!

[Anonymous]

OP: Please share the school names if you found the parent communities welcoming & generally interested in being friends with each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you kids are just starting school, I recommend a school that has a pre-k program. That way you can meet people that will be around until 8th grade or even high school.

Doesn’t matter if your pre- K program is full of snobby people. Our kids started Beauvoir in pre-K and were stuck with the same snobby groups of parents for 18+ years.