Guidance

[Anonymous]

We are going to be spending time with some old friends we haven't seen in a while whose daughter has some serious cognitive challenges. What guidance should I give to my 7-year-old to help her be sensitive to the situation?

[Anonymous]

I explain to my 6 y/o that not everyone is going to be like her school-mates. Some people have issues with their brain and can't think or act like everyone else. I make it clear that they are still people that deserve our respect and consideration. I explain what needs to be considered, such as "Sometimes he throws toys, but he doesn't understand that they could hit you. So, please pay attention and be careful." I explain that the child does not understand language.

I give her time to look and try to figure out how to act on her own. Expect a certain time of "deer in the headlights" look while they sort out what the situation calls for. Really, it is a social situation that they have not encountered that they need to figure out.

Other than that, I act normal. I greet the other child and speak to them, even though they don't understand.