Ferber Method at Four Months?

[Anonymous]

Has anyone used the Ferber method for their four month old? We're considering it because DS (four months / 16 lbs.) is in the middle of a major sleep regression.

Previously (2.5 to 3.5 months), he would sleep for 8-10 hours straight, then do a quick feed and go back to sleep until 7 am. However, starting a few weeks ago, he's been waking up every two hours and can't fall back asleep unless he's in our bed and we rock/sing to him.

So we're thinking about doing Ferber. (We read the book and did it with DD when she was 5.5 months and smaller than DS is now at 4 months.)

Anyway, just looking for thoughts/advice. Is four months too early under these circumstances?

[Anonymous]

Our four month old is doing the same thing. I'm going to hold off on sleep training until he's at least 6 months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our four month old is doing the same thing. I'm going to hold off on sleep training until he's at least 6 months.

Why?

[Anonymous]

We did it at around 4 months with our oldest. It worked like a charm and only took about three-four nights. Still a great sleeper at 5. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

We did it at four months as well. It wasn't the fact she wouldn't sleep more than 2-3 hours that was driving us insane. It was the 1-2 hours it took to get her down between times. We used Ferber just at four months and, within 4 days, we got to a 20 minute "bedtime" and falling back asleep almost immediately after being fed for night-time wake-ups. Our DD didn't sleep through the night until about 8 months of age, but Ferber helped us tremendously in getting her to a healthy sleep pattern.

[Anonymous]

At the 4 month regression, I felt DS was just testing his new social awareness. If I'm awake, will mommy play? He slept in a bassinett next to me. I just ignored his attempts to play. It's sleep time. One night he was awake for a good hour while I played possum. He might fuss (not all out cry), but after a few nights he got that it was sleep time. I think I was such so exhausted at that time, that I was ready for hours of bouncing/walking.

Leaving the room while they cry is emotionally challenging, to say the least. If you can find other methods of letting him know it's time for sleep, I would try that first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We did it at four months as well. It wasn't the fact she wouldn't sleep more than 2-3 hours that was driving us insane. It was the 1-2 hours it took to get her down between times. We used Ferber just at four months and, within 4 days, we got to a 20 minute "bedtime" and falling back asleep almost immediately after being fed for night-time wake-ups. Our DD didn't sleep through the night until about 8 months of age, but Ferber helped us tremendously in getting her to a healthy sleep pattern.

Did I write this? Seriously- exactly the same thing. We did Ferber the night after he turned 4 months (I felt too bad the night of since he'd gotten shots that day at the pediatrician appointment). The first night was hard- he cried for 37 minutes with check-ins, then the second night was about 10 minutes, and by the third night he was asleep in less than five. We've had a few regressions here and there, especially with teething, and he didn't STTN until 7.5 months but he now sleeps from 6:30 to 6 or 6:30 straight (he'll be 9 months next week).
Just like PP, it wasn't the night wakings that were killing me but the rocking to get him to sleep. It was 30 minutes of rocking, 8 times a day (between naps and night wakings) and I was seriously losing my mind. My pediatrician gave me the go ahead at the four month check up, and it was the best thing we did. Hard, but so worth it. Good luck to you!

[Anonymous]

We used Weissbluth's CIO method at around 4 months post-due date. Worked like a charm.

[Anonymous]

We did it at 3 months. She'd been sleeping through the night since 1 month consistently, then started waking up once a night. After a few nights, we let her CIO and it took 2 nights. She doesn't seem scarred.

[Anonymous]

We did it at 4.5 months when DS started rejecting the swaddle and could no longer be put on his crib asleep. Worked well. By the fourth night only a few minutes of crying.

[Anonymous]

Thanks everyone.

When you did Ferber at around 4 months, did anyone's baby end up sleeping on his or her stomach? I'm guessing ours may do that once he's out of the swaddle. At the moment, he's all about flipping over to his stomach and seems to have forgotten how to flip back. So I think he may end up dropping his head and sleeping on his belly. Safe?

[Anonymous]

Its 5:30 am and I just put our son back down from his second night feeding. He is a little over 3 months and using a modified version of Ferber (we actually rub his belly) he is going to sleep on his own in under 10 minutes. We JUST started this yesterday at nap time and the longest he has fought has been 12 minutes (I went in at 3 minutes, then 5 and each time he has fallen asleep after the 2nd visit). Just now, he fell asleep after the first 3 minute visit. I am a firm believer that once your child is beginning to make associations with his surrounding world (Ie knows who you are, what makes him happy and sad etc) it is time to immediately start allowing them to learn to sleep. My wife and I have consulted a number of books and the general theme for the more aggressive sleep training books is that the earlier you start the quicker and easier it is - seems to hold true with just about everything in life

Please keep in mind he isn't quite old enough to eat enough to go for 12 hours but he is typically down at 7:30, wakes for a feeding at 2:30 (so 7 hours) then sometimes wakes now for a little top off before getting up for good around 8am. We are using the sleep training for the exact reason as a few of the previous posts - to be able to avoid the battle of getting them asleep in your arms and trying to make the transition to the bed!!

[Anonymous]

DO NOT let a 4 month old cry it out! that is WAY too young. Kids/babies build trust by having their parents come to them when they cry. DO NOT just let a baby that young cry. It would be awful for you and the baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks everyone.

When you did Ferber at around 4 months, did anyone's baby end up sleeping on his or her stomach? I'm guessing ours may do that once he's out of the swaddle. At the moment, he's all about flipping over to his stomach and seems to have forgotten how to flip back. So I think he may end up dropping his head and sleeping on his belly. Safe?

Our ped said 4-6 months is appropriate for Ferber and we did it at 5 months. It worked great. Took 3 nights (45 min, 15 min, 5 min!). If your baby is flipping onto his stomach you should consider taking him out of his swaddle, or at least taking his arms out so he can push himself up. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DO NOT let a 4 month old cry it out! that is WAY too young. Kids/babies build trust by having their parents come to them when they cry. DO NOT just let a baby that young cry. It would be awful for you and the baby.

We Ferbered at 4.5 months and my now-toddler trusts me. Or at least I think she does given all the hugs, the smiles, the running across the room to be near me when I walk in, the "Mommy, I love yous," etc. OP - obviously solicit feedback and do what works best for you. Don't let anyone make you feel guilty for trying something. if it doesn't work for you, try something else.