Transgender congressperson calls for practical compromise on transgender policy

[Anonymous]

Republicans looking very strong, Dems in huge trouble. We should have listened to Sarah McBride. Shoving male transwomen into girls’ locker rooms may have been a costly political miscalculation.
https://x.com/ForecasterEnten/status/1904552676752236920?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1904552676752236920%7Ctwgr%5Ec51fc68d0962e785ebbe645de2a04c270af0df1f%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.dcurbanmom.com%2Fjforum%2Fposts%2Flist%2F540%2F1256330.page29746895

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sarah McBride tells Democrats to stop infighting and stop demanding ideological purity, and stop taking the bait from social conservatives and crushing themselves.


https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2025/03/sarah-mcbride-says-democrats-should-be-more-open-to-opponents-of-trans-rights/

Everyone has to make a sacrifice to get through difficult times.
Changing hearts and minds and social structures and physical facilities takes time.
Compromise on sports. Compromise on bathrooms.
"It's not fair" just isn't a strong enough argument. It's too subjective. Play to win, not be be a righteous loser.
Sometimes the better option is to wait out the old generation, not give them ammo to inflame a new generation. Sometimes you have to be a martyr for your cause, because you can't win by force of will.


Progressives, the goal is to make continual progress, not be rigid absolutists ther ignores the feelings and actual power of opponents. "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice. " -MLK

Be good, but be smart.
It's not too late.

Gen Z is far more conservative on this issue than the Millennials.

Not IME. Gen Z grew up around this.

Yes. Which is why, except for a subset of wealthy/UMC coastal kids, they are far more conservative on this issue. They’ve grown up around this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sarah McBride tells Democrats to stop infighting and stop demanding ideological purity, and stop taking the bait from social conservatives and crushing themselves.


https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2025/03/sarah-mcbride-says-democrats-should-be-more-open-to-opponents-of-trans-rights/

Everyone has to make a sacrifice to get through difficult times.
Changing hearts and minds and social structures and physical facilities takes time.
Compromise on sports. Compromise on bathrooms.
"It's not fair" just isn't a strong enough argument. It's too subjective. Play to win, not be be a righteous loser.
Sometimes the better option is to wait out the old generation, not give them ammo to inflame a new generation. Sometimes you have to be a martyr for your cause, because you can't win by force of will.


Progressives, the goal is to make continual progress, not be rigid absolutists ther ignores the feelings and actual power of opponents. "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice. " -MLK

Be good, but be smart.
It's not too late.

Why should basic human rights be subject to any sort of compromise?

Men have a right to use women's changing rooms? Where is that in the bill of rights?

I'm a trans male and if I walked into a women's restroom right now, your wives would freak and kick me out. They'd call the security guards or the police. I may have a vagina and sit to pee, but I'm 100% passing as a male thanks to years of T and top surgery.

When you think of trans people, don't think of men in dresses. Don't think of drag queens. Drag queens are NOT trans. Drag is an art form. Drag is a profession or hobby. It's not a total lifestyle for 99.9% of people. Heck, I know quite a few drag queens who aren't even gay. They just enjoy the art and performance of it all. I know even more drag kings who are not queer.

Very few trans people these days who have been on hormones for 6+ months are not passing as their new gender. After a year on hormones, you can't pick us out from cis individuals.

The no trans in bathrooms/changing rooms doesn't actually hurt trans people because cis people can't actually tell who is trans if they are not some famous trans influencer or advocate from social media. The anti-trans movement actually hurts cis women who do not look traditionally feminine (short hair, broader shoulders, flat-chested) and cis men who do not look traditionally masculine (slim build, longer hair, delicate facial features). Those are the people who are actually getting harassed in bathrooms, not me. I've been peeing in men's rooms, using the men's locker rooms, and using men's changing rooms for decades now. Never had an issue.

Sarah McBride may not be able to use the women's restroom in Congress, but I bet she does everywhere else and guess what? I doubt anyone has ever questioned it or hassled her.

Drag is a product of women’s historical oppression. It is when a member of the privileged group appropriates members of a historically and currently oppressed group for entertainment purposes.

You wouldn’t call black face an art form.

+1

I find the continued defense of drag from people who believe themselves to be non-sexist absolutely baffling. It is of course minstrelism and will be seen with the same horror in fifty years that blackface is now.

Comparing gender in race when it comes to transgender issues never seems to go well. Black face and minstrel shows are built on mocking black people and portraying them incredibly stereotypically. Drag (although it can sometimes be campy) often shows femininity as beautiful, and in my opinion (although I'm not a drag queen) is more leaning in to the sterotype of gay men being dramatic, feminine and over the top than stereotypes about women. Drag queens are often the but of their own jokes, rather than mocking women. The reason people call drag an art form is because it takes a mix of fashion and acting/singing/comedy/stage presence to pull off.
(Again I'm not a drag queen, I just like a lot of drag queens' looks and think they are funny)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sarah McBride tells Democrats to stop infighting and stop demanding ideological purity, and stop taking the bait from social conservatives and crushing themselves.


https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2025/03/sarah-mcbride-says-democrats-should-be-more-open-to-opponents-of-trans-rights/

Everyone has to make a sacrifice to get through difficult times.
Changing hearts and minds and social structures and physical facilities takes time.
Compromise on sports. Compromise on bathrooms.
"It's not fair" just isn't a strong enough argument. It's too subjective. Play to win, not be be a righteous loser.
Sometimes the better option is to wait out the old generation, not give them ammo to inflame a new generation. Sometimes you have to be a martyr for your cause, because you can't win by force of will.


Progressives, the goal is to make continual progress, not be rigid absolutists ther ignores the feelings and actual power of opponents. "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice. " -MLK

Be good, but be smart.
It's not too late.

Why should basic human rights be subject to any sort of compromise?

Men have a right to use women's changing rooms? Where is that in the bill of rights?

I'm a trans male and if I walked into a women's restroom right now, your wives would freak and kick me out. They'd call the security guards or the police. I may have a vagina and sit to pee, but I'm 100% passing as a male thanks to years of T and top surgery.

When you think of trans people, don't think of men in dresses. Don't think of drag queens. Drag queens are NOT trans. Drag is an art form. Drag is a profession or hobby. It's not a total lifestyle for 99.9% of people. Heck, I know quite a few drag queens who aren't even gay. They just enjoy the art and performance of it all. I know even more drag kings who are not queer.

Very few trans people these days who have been on hormones for 6+ months are not passing as their new gender. After a year on hormones, you can't pick us out from cis individuals.

The no trans in bathrooms/changing rooms doesn't actually hurt trans people because cis people can't actually tell who is trans if they are not some famous trans influencer or advocate from social media. The anti-trans movement actually hurts cis women who do not look traditionally feminine (short hair, broader shoulders, flat-chested) and cis men who do not look traditionally masculine (slim build, longer hair, delicate facial features). Those are the people who are actually getting harassed in bathrooms, not me. I've been peeing in men's rooms, using the men's locker rooms, and using men's changing rooms for decades now. Never had an issue.

Sarah McBride may not be able to use the women's restroom in Congress, but I bet she does everywhere else and guess what? I doubt anyone has ever questioned it or hassled her.

Drag is a product of women’s historical oppression. It is when a member of the privileged group appropriates members of a historically and currently oppressed group for entertainment purposes.

You wouldn’t call black face an art form.

+1

I find the continued defense of drag from people who believe themselves to be non-sexist absolutely baffling. It is of course minstrelism and will be seen with the same horror in fifty years that blackface is now.

Comparing gender in race when it comes to transgender issues never seems to go well. Black face and minstrel shows are built on mocking black people and portraying them incredibly stereotypically. Drag (although it can sometimes be campy) often shows femininity as beautiful, and in my opinion (although I'm not a drag queen) is more leaning in to the sterotype of gay men being dramatic, feminine and over the top than stereotypes about women. Drag queens are often the but of their own jokes, rather than mocking women. The reason people call drag an art form is because it takes a mix of fashion and acting/singing/comedy/stage presence to pull off.
(Again I'm not a drag queen, I just like a lot of drag queens' looks and think they are funny)

Have you ever been to a drag show?? They call us “fish.” It’s a popular drag term. They’re saying our vaginas smell bad. Wow what an homage 🙄

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sarah McBride tells Democrats to stop infighting and stop demanding ideological purity, and stop taking the bait from social conservatives and crushing themselves.


https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2025/03/sarah-mcbride-says-democrats-should-be-more-open-to-opponents-of-trans-rights/

Everyone has to make a sacrifice to get through difficult times.
Changing hearts and minds and social structures and physical facilities takes time.
Compromise on sports. Compromise on bathrooms.
"It's not fair" just isn't a strong enough argument. It's too subjective. Play to win, not be be a righteous loser.
Sometimes the better option is to wait out the old generation, not give them ammo to inflame a new generation. Sometimes you have to be a martyr for your cause, because you can't win by force of will.


Progressives, the goal is to make continual progress, not be rigid absolutists ther ignores the feelings and actual power of opponents. "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice. " -MLK

Be good, but be smart.
It's not too late.

Why should basic human rights be subject to any sort of compromise?

Men have a right to use women's changing rooms? Where is that in the bill of rights?

I'm a trans male and if I walked into a women's restroom right now, your wives would freak and kick me out. They'd call the security guards or the police. I may have a vagina and sit to pee, but I'm 100% passing as a male thanks to years of T and top surgery.

When you think of trans people, don't think of men in dresses. Don't think of drag queens. Drag queens are NOT trans. Drag is an art form. Drag is a profession or hobby. It's not a total lifestyle for 99.9% of people. Heck, I know quite a few drag queens who aren't even gay. They just enjoy the art and performance of it all. I know even more drag kings who are not queer.

Very few trans people these days who have been on hormones for 6+ months are not passing as their new gender. After a year on hormones, you can't pick us out from cis individuals.

The no trans in bathrooms/changing rooms doesn't actually hurt trans people because cis people can't actually tell who is trans if they are not some famous trans influencer or advocate from social media. The anti-trans movement actually hurts cis women who do not look traditionally feminine (short hair, broader shoulders, flat-chested) and cis men who do not look traditionally masculine (slim build, longer hair, delicate facial features). Those are the people who are actually getting harassed in bathrooms, not me. I've been peeing in men's rooms, using the men's locker rooms, and using men's changing rooms for decades now. Never had an issue.

Sarah McBride may not be able to use the women's restroom in Congress, but I bet she does everywhere else and guess what? I doubt anyone has ever questioned it or hassled her.

the fact is - nobody really cares (including the right) if a well passing trans person discreetly uses the bathroom of their chosen gender. The issue is things like actively forcing girls and women to be exposed to mentally ill people flashing their penises in the women’s changing room, people who went through male puberty taking sports achievements from women and girls or endangering them, and housing sex offending intact biological males in women’s jails.

I’m more concerned about being exposed to GOP males who want to inspect my and my children’s genitals to make sure we are comporting with their Stone Age world views as to who gets to be treated like human and who gets to be treated like a bangmaid. Why won’t someone protect my interests?

Or, you know, we could use a birth certificate. Which schools already have. And are supposed to be accurate. Like we've been doing for like hundred years.

Your obsession with these fantasy "inspections" just proves you are an unserious person.

You want us to bring birth certificates to go to the bathroom?!

Or we could just go back to pre-2015 normalcy and social expectations. Why do you all think that is so hard?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sarah McBride tells Democrats to stop infighting and stop demanding ideological purity, and stop taking the bait from social conservatives and crushing themselves.


https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2025/03/sarah-mcbride-says-democrats-should-be-more-open-to-opponents-of-trans-rights/

Everyone has to make a sacrifice to get through difficult times.
Changing hearts and minds and social structures and physical facilities takes time.
Compromise on sports. Compromise on bathrooms.
"It's not fair" just isn't a strong enough argument. It's too subjective. Play to win, not be be a righteous loser.
Sometimes the better option is to wait out the old generation, not give them ammo to inflame a new generation. Sometimes you have to be a martyr for your cause, because you can't win by force of will.


Progressives, the goal is to make continual progress, not be rigid absolutists ther ignores the feelings and actual power of opponents. "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice. " -MLK

Be good, but be smart.
It's not too late.

Why should basic human rights be subject to any sort of compromise?

Men have a right to use women's changing rooms? Where is that in the bill of rights?

I'm a trans male and if I walked into a women's restroom right now, your wives would freak and kick me out. They'd call the security guards or the police. I may have a vagina and sit to pee, but I'm 100% passing as a male thanks to years of T and top surgery.

When you think of trans people, don't think of men in dresses. Don't think of drag queens. Drag queens are NOT trans. Drag is an art form. Drag is a profession or hobby. It's not a total lifestyle for 99.9% of people. Heck, I know quite a few drag queens who aren't even gay. They just enjoy the art and performance of it all. I know even more drag kings who are not queer.

Very few trans people these days who have been on hormones for 6+ months are not passing as their new gender. After a year on hormones, you can't pick us out from cis individuals.

The no trans in bathrooms/changing rooms doesn't actually hurt trans people because cis people can't actually tell who is trans if they are not some famous trans influencer or advocate from social media. The anti-trans movement actually hurts cis women who do not look traditionally feminine (short hair, broader shoulders, flat-chested) and cis men who do not look traditionally masculine (slim build, longer hair, delicate facial features). Those are the people who are actually getting harassed in bathrooms, not me. I've been peeing in men's rooms, using the men's locker rooms, and using men's changing rooms for decades now. Never had an issue.

Sarah McBride may not be able to use the women's restroom in Congress, but I bet she does everywhere else and guess what? I doubt anyone has ever questioned it or hassled her.

Drag is a product of women’s historical oppression. It is when a member of the privileged group appropriates members of a historically and currently oppressed group for entertainment purposes.

You wouldn’t call black face an art form.

+1

I find the continued defense of drag from people who believe themselves to be non-sexist absolutely baffling. It is of course minstrelism and will be seen with the same horror in fifty years that blackface is now.

Comparing gender in race when it comes to transgender issues never seems to go well. Black face and minstrel shows are built on mocking black people and portraying them incredibly stereotypically. Drag (although it can sometimes be campy) often shows femininity as beautiful, and in my opinion (although I'm not a drag queen) is more leaning in to the sterotype of gay men being dramatic, feminine and over the top than stereotypes about women. Drag queens are often the but of their own jokes, rather than mocking women. The reason people call drag an art form is because it takes a mix of fashion and acting/singing/comedy/stage presence to pull off.
(Again I'm not a drag queen, I just like a lot of drag queens' looks and think they are funny)

No. This is the voice of male privilege and misogyny attempting to gaslight.

If this were even slightly true, drag would not feature the grotesquely exaggerated immutable physical features of women. Enormous fake breasts would not be part of the “art,” and neither would exaggerated lips. There is nothing beautiful about the mockery.

If drag was truly just an act of admiration—and such cajones it takes, to openly mock the female physical form and then claim it is admiration! — the art form would not be so exploitative. Women are killed over their breasts, sometimes tortured. Yet we are supposed to believe men are admiring women this way? No.

This is a form of mintrelism, and it’s on the wrong side of history. That’s already happening; younger gay men are turning away from drag. Socially, this is going to join blackface in the bin of history where it belongs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sarah McBride tells Democrats to stop infighting and stop demanding ideological purity, and stop taking the bait from social conservatives and crushing themselves.


https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2025/03/sarah-mcbride-says-democrats-should-be-more-open-to-opponents-of-trans-rights/

Everyone has to make a sacrifice to get through difficult times.
Changing hearts and minds and social structures and physical facilities takes time.
Compromise on sports. Compromise on bathrooms.
"It's not fair" just isn't a strong enough argument. It's too subjective. Play to win, not be be a righteous loser.
Sometimes the better option is to wait out the old generation, not give them ammo to inflame a new generation. Sometimes you have to be a martyr for your cause, because you can't win by force of will.


Progressives, the goal is to make continual progress, not be rigid absolutists ther ignores the feelings and actual power of opponents. "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice. " -MLK

Be good, but be smart.
It's not too late.

Why should basic human rights be subject to any sort of compromise?

Men have a right to use women's changing rooms? Where is that in the bill of rights?

I'm a trans male and if I walked into a women's restroom right now, your wives would freak and kick me out. They'd call the security guards or the police. I may have a vagina and sit to pee, but I'm 100% passing as a male thanks to years of T and top surgery.

When you think of trans people, don't think of men in dresses. Don't think of drag queens. Drag queens are NOT trans. Drag is an art form. Drag is a profession or hobby. It's not a total lifestyle for 99.9% of people. Heck, I know quite a few drag queens who aren't even gay. They just enjoy the art and performance of it all. I know even more drag kings who are not queer.

Very few trans people these days who have been on hormones for 6+ months are not passing as their new gender. After a year on hormones, you can't pick us out from cis individuals.

The no trans in bathrooms/changing rooms doesn't actually hurt trans people because cis people can't actually tell who is trans if they are not some famous trans influencer or advocate from social media. The anti-trans movement actually hurts cis women who do not look traditionally feminine (short hair, broader shoulders, flat-chested) and cis men who do not look traditionally masculine (slim build, longer hair, delicate facial features). Those are the people who are actually getting harassed in bathrooms, not me. I've been peeing in men's rooms, using the men's locker rooms, and using men's changing rooms for decades now. Never had an issue.

Sarah McBride may not be able to use the women's restroom in Congress, but I bet she does everywhere else and guess what? I doubt anyone has ever questioned it or hassled her.

Very cool perspective! Thank you! What’s your take on the transwoman athlete question? And on whether or not Democrats should keep standing firm on it or temporarily take Saran McBride’s advice.

For trans athletes, their hormone levels need to be in range with that gender to compete with them.

So for me, I've been on T for so long that my hormone levels mimic cis males and my musculature mimics cis males. It would be dangerous for me to compete against women in any contact sport, IMO. I also think I would have an edge in terms of speed and strength in many other sports versus cis females. Am I as tall as all cis males? Not at all. I didn't start T before puberty, so I didn't get any kind of height growth. I was tall for a female at 5'10", so I'm average-ish height trans guy. I'm not going to dominate cis men in most male sports, but I'm also not going to hurt them or get hurt by them. That's the key, IMO.

If someone is new to T and transitioning from FTM and their hormone levels puts them in line with an average cis female, then yes, they should compete with the females until their levels rise. And vice versa for MTF.

I'm all for allyship, but allies need to follow what actual transpeople like Sarah McBride are saying. If we're saying standdown and less is more, follow suit. Be an ally by not allowing transphobia and calling people out on that, but leave the fighting the issues to us. Does that make sense? Be our supportive backup, but let actual trans people lead the fight on the frontlines, so to speak.

I appreciate the thoughtful response, but I do not see how your last paragraph works.

Let’s take the example of the Oregon laws that allowed a recent high school trans girl runner (born male) to destroy the competition. The child is fully allowed to run under Oregon laws and did so.

How does this stop or continue? Either way, litigation, either from the displaced runners or from the child barred, if barred (I will not use the child’s name here). And that’s not something that McBride can control.

McBride’s advice is essentially an extension of what Democrats have been doing so far: avoidance. But this is now a legal issue, and will be resolved as one. So I do not see how McBride’s advice can be followed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sarah McBride tells Democrats to stop infighting and stop demanding ideological purity, and stop taking the bait from social conservatives and crushing themselves.


https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2025/03/sarah-mcbride-says-democrats-should-be-more-open-to-opponents-of-trans-rights/

Everyone has to make a sacrifice to get through difficult times.
Changing hearts and minds and social structures and physical facilities takes time.
Compromise on sports. Compromise on bathrooms.
"It's not fair" just isn't a strong enough argument. It's too subjective. Play to win, not be be a righteous loser.
Sometimes the better option is to wait out the old generation, not give them ammo to inflame a new generation. Sometimes you have to be a martyr for your cause, because you can't win by force of will.


Progressives, the goal is to make continual progress, not be rigid absolutists ther ignores the feelings and actual power of opponents. "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice. " -MLK

Be good, but be smart.
It's not too late.

Why should basic human rights be subject to any sort of compromise?

Men have a right to use women's changing rooms? Where is that in the bill of rights?

I'm a trans male and if I walked into a women's restroom right now, your wives would freak and kick me out. They'd call the security guards or the police. I may have a vagina and sit to pee, but I'm 100% passing as a male thanks to years of T and top surgery.

When you think of trans people, don't think of men in dresses. Don't think of drag queens. Drag queens are NOT trans. Drag is an art form. Drag is a profession or hobby. It's not a total lifestyle for 99.9% of people. Heck, I know quite a few drag queens who aren't even gay. They just enjoy the art and performance of it all. I know even more drag kings who are not queer.

Very few trans people these days who have been on hormones for 6+ months are not passing as their new gender. After a year on hormones, you can't pick us out from cis individuals.

The no trans in bathrooms/changing rooms doesn't actually hurt trans people because cis people can't actually tell who is trans if they are not some famous trans influencer or advocate from social media. The anti-trans movement actually hurts cis women who do not look traditionally feminine (short hair, broader shoulders, flat-chested) and cis men who do not look traditionally masculine (slim build, longer hair, delicate facial features). Those are the people who are actually getting harassed in bathrooms, not me. I've been peeing in men's rooms, using the men's locker rooms, and using men's changing rooms for decades now. Never had an issue.

Sarah McBride may not be able to use the women's restroom in Congress, but I bet she does everywhere else and guess what? I doubt anyone has ever questioned it or hassled her.

Drag is a product of women’s historical oppression. It is when a member of the privileged group appropriates members of a historically and currently oppressed group for entertainment purposes.

You wouldn’t call black face an art form.

+1

I find the continued defense of drag from people who believe themselves to be non-sexist absolutely baffling. It is of course minstrelism and will be seen with the same horror in fifty years that blackface is now.

Comparing gender in race when it comes to transgender issues never seems to go well. Black face and minstrel shows are built on mocking black people and portraying them incredibly stereotypically. Drag (although it can sometimes be campy) often shows femininity as beautiful, and in my opinion (although I'm not a drag queen) is more leaning in to the sterotype of gay men being dramatic, feminine and over the top than stereotypes about women. Drag queens are often the but of their own jokes, rather than mocking women. The reason people call drag an art form is because it takes a mix of fashion and acting/singing/comedy/stage presence to pull off.
(Again I'm not a drag queen, I just like a lot of drag queens' looks and think they are funny)

So if blackface wasn’t as mocking you’d be ok with it….

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sarah McBride tells Democrats to stop infighting and stop demanding ideological purity, and stop taking the bait from social conservatives and crushing themselves.


https://www.lgbtqnation.com/2025/03/sarah-mcbride-says-democrats-should-be-more-open-to-opponents-of-trans-rights/

Everyone has to make a sacrifice to get through difficult times.
Changing hearts and minds and social structures and physical facilities takes time.
Compromise on sports. Compromise on bathrooms.
"It's not fair" just isn't a strong enough argument. It's too subjective. Play to win, not be be a righteous loser.
Sometimes the better option is to wait out the old generation, not give them ammo to inflame a new generation. Sometimes you have to be a martyr for your cause, because you can't win by force of will.


Progressives, the goal is to make continual progress, not be rigid absolutists ther ignores the feelings and actual power of opponents. "The arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice. " -MLK

Be good, but be smart.
It's not too late.

Why should basic human rights be subject to any sort of compromise?

Men have a right to use women's changing rooms? Where is that in the bill of rights?

I'm a trans male and if I walked into a women's restroom right now, your wives would freak and kick me out. They'd call the security guards or the police. I may have a vagina and sit to pee, but I'm 100% passing as a male thanks to years of T and top surgery.

When you think of trans people, don't think of men in dresses. Don't think of drag queens. Drag queens are NOT trans. Drag is an art form. Drag is a profession or hobby. It's not a total lifestyle for 99.9% of people. Heck, I know quite a few drag queens who aren't even gay. They just enjoy the art and performance of it all. I know even more drag kings who are not queer.

Very few trans people these days who have been on hormones for 6+ months are not passing as their new gender. After a year on hormones, you can't pick us out from cis individuals.

The no trans in bathrooms/changing rooms doesn't actually hurt trans people because cis people can't actually tell who is trans if they are not some famous trans influencer or advocate from social media. The anti-trans movement actually hurts cis women who do not look traditionally feminine (short hair, broader shoulders, flat-chested) and cis men who do not look traditionally masculine (slim build, longer hair, delicate facial features). Those are the people who are actually getting harassed in bathrooms, not me. I've been peeing in men's rooms, using the men's locker rooms, and using men's changing rooms for decades now. Never had an issue.

Sarah McBride may not be able to use the women's restroom in Congress, but I bet she does everywhere else and guess what? I doubt anyone has ever questioned it or hassled her.

Drag is a product of women’s historical oppression. It is when a member of the privileged group appropriates members of a historically and currently oppressed group for entertainment purposes.

You wouldn’t call black face an art form.

+1

I find the continued defense of drag from people who believe themselves to be non-sexist absolutely baffling. It is of course minstrelism and will be seen with the same horror in fifty years that blackface is now.

Comparing gender in race when it comes to transgender issues never seems to go well. Black face and minstrel shows are built on mocking black people and portraying them incredibly stereotypically. Drag (although it can sometimes be campy) often shows femininity as beautiful, and in my opinion (although I'm not a drag queen) is more leaning in to the sterotype of gay men being dramatic, feminine and over the top than stereotypes about women. Drag queens are often the but of their own jokes, rather than mocking women. The reason people call drag an art form is because it takes a mix of fashion and acting/singing/comedy/stage presence to pull off.
(Again I'm not a drag queen, I just like a lot of drag queens' looks and think they are funny)

Have you ever been to a drag show?? They call us “fish.” It’s a popular drag term. They’re saying our vaginas smell bad. Wow what an homage 🙄

LMAO! Jesus, I needed a good laugh today. That's NOT what fish or fishy means in drag. JFC!

This is what it means in drag culture: https://reelrapture.com/what-does-fish-mean-in-drag/ and https://fishyfeatures.com/what-does-fish-mean-in-drag-learn-the-secret-meaning-behind-the-term/.

[Anonymous]

Who will pay for the hormone tests? It's good in theory but not in practice. Levels can change quickly.

I would like to see some trials done where the top male, female, and trans runners compete against each other. Just for test purposes. But are there even that many trans runners? I can only name 1 non-binary runner (Nikki Hiltz) and they are not trans.

[Anonymous]

What a lot of dems don't seem to get is that this issue is just the gift that keeps on giving for the GOP.

The only way to escape it is, as McBride suggests, to neutralize it as an issue via compromise. Just accept that people in this country are not ready and will not accept an aggressive approach to trans rights, and to let go of some of these arguments right now.

Trans athletes are an easy one for me especially if we just limit to collegiate and Olympic sports. Access to sports at that level is just honestly not that important to most Americans. It's not like compromising on discrimination against trans workers or access to healthcare. We're talking about a small collection of trans women who will be in the tough and sad position of not getting to compete at the highest levels of their sports. It sucks but it's a handful of people. And lots of people don't compete in the highest levels of sports for all kinds of unfair reasons -- they get injured, they don't have the money, or their potential is physically limited. It's like yeah, that's too bad, but is it a tragedy? No, I'm sorry, it's not.

And it doesn't even have to be all Dems. There are Dems who are very progressive on these issues and in very safe states/districts where pushing all the way on trans rights works for them. But party leadership, the platform, and the people we choose to advocate for the party in the media? This should be people who are willing to say "there are real concerns about the fairness of allowing trans women to compete on women's teams at the collegiate and olympic level, and we support bans on this practice for the time being as sports and governing bodies look for ways to ensure fairness." If you can't say that, you shouldn't be speaking on behalf of the party. This should be a litmus test for congressional leadership, presidential candidates, DNC chair, etc. Not just avoiding the issue or saying "can we talk about more important things" but a true capitulation on this issue. The voters demand it, I'm sorry. And there are more important things, like the freaking rule of law, and it would be idiotic for this party to waste our time and political capital ensuring that like 4 trans athletes get to compete on a women's team. It is not worth it, sorry to those athletes but I'm sure you will find other worthwhile things to do with your lives.

[Anonymous]

I always want to know who the "radical trans activists" are. I'm the mom of a trans daughter. I guess I am a "radical trans activist" because I care about my child's safety and life.

It's sort of this crazy idea that you become absolutely obsessed with trans people without actually being a trans person? It's like saying that a Jewish person is a "radical Jewish activist" because they care about antisemitism.

And what makes you the "radical" part? What makes you an "activist?" Can you not just care about trans people because you are one or you love one?

Personally, I could care less about the sports stuff. Republicans drummed all of this up to force Democrats to take a position. And I see it a lot like Obama saying he wasn't for gay marriage, when of course he was. He just couldn't say it and win. It means nothing. It affects hardly anyone. I do think Democrats should just give up on it temporarily because it will make Republicans have to find something else stupid to go crazy over, which of course they will.

Trans women in men's prisons is dangerous. That's going to cause rape and murder.

Forcing trans people to use bathrooms of their biological sex is dangerous. It only ends up being butch lesbians who are called out for no reason. It's so stupid, and if we all care that much, start adding more single bathrooms. You think trans people WANT to freak out when they have to pee?

I want the government to stay out of my kid's healthcare, and stay out of parents' rights to handle their kids' healthcare. Stop using terms like "mutilation" that are pejorative. That term could apply to all kinds of legal things people do to themselves.

I hate Republicans, and I hate transphobes. My kid is lucky. She has rich parents and rich grandparents, and she's white and pretty and smart and goes to a good college where she has a girlfriend and friends that don't care that she's trans. And she's studying for a career where she can make a good amount of money if she wants to. She is so well protected because she has supportive parents who are wealthy and white.

I admit I do take some joy in that--knowing that there is really nothing these bigots can do to make my kid's life bad. She's always going to have more money than most of them. They can mess with her healthcare, but we will always help her find a way around that. In the worst case scenario, she would move to another country. Just like all rich people, the laws don't hurt her the way they do poor people.

Of course that doesn't help the poor trans people and the black ones. They're screwed, like poor people always are.

[Anonymous]

Democrats in California blocked a bill requiring no boys in girls locker rooms or sports teams.

[Anonymous]

Why am I not surprised that a mom of a trans kid is rich and hates Republicans? dcurbanmoms are becoming caricatures of ourselves. Oh well. We’re going to have to lose a few more elections before we can get over ourselves

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Democrats in California blocked a bill requiring no boys in girls locker rooms or sports teams.

45 Democratic US Senators just did the same thing. Like it or not, our Party wants transwomen and their male parts to have access to women’s spaces. And our Party wants transwomen fighting hate in elementary schools. We say it’s no big deal, and it shouldn’t be a big deal, but is non-negotiable for the Party. We are going to give trans folks what they want, whether swing voters like it or not. And we are going to give trans folks what they want whether democratic voters like it or not. This issue is not up for discussion by Party leadership. There is no backing off, there is no reversing progress. These cutsie ideas about “backing off temporarily” or throwing trans athletes under the bus are non-starters. Get used to the Democratic Party policies. And if you don’t like them, go join the Green Party or the Republican Party.