Learning to love your back-up school

[Anonymous]

If your DC ended up at a school that was last on your list, what concrete things helped you most to get into a positive frame of mind about the school? How long did it take to get over the disappointment?

[Anonymous]

step one is to stop thinking about it in terms of the 'backup school' -- especially if 'back-up school' = big three/four.

presumably all the schools you applied to were potential good fits for your child...in that case, none of them would be bad options.

and sometimes the schools CAN tell if a child would be a good fit at a particular school - and so it is possible that the teachers, etc. at the play date saw a spark in your child that made them think "this is the place for them; they would thrive here."

so in the end it may end up being the best choice for your child. and many schools that people think of as 'back up schools' are gems. they are back up ONLY in that perhaps they don't get quite as many applications or it isn't quite as competitive.

keep in mind that maret, sidwell, and GDS for instance go through high school -- that is one of the big reasons they are so sought after. who wants to go through this process again? that very element alone makes their application pool bigger and getting in more competitive.

start getting your child excited for the school. visit it in person and on-line. point out the positives that your child can look forward to. find other kids who will be going to the school.

i bet a year from now you are one of the folks on the board talking about how you were disappointed but are not thrilled with your child's experience.

[Anonymous]

sorry, i mis-typed ... i meant

back up school = NOT one of the big 3/4

[Anonymous]

and, sheesh, i meant NOW thrilled with your child's experience. sorry - just in a rush but i want to make sure my point is clearly stated

[Anonymous]

Well, I definitely hope so!

[Anonymous]

Well, it wasn't our very last choice, but it wasn't among our favorites until we sent our child there. I couldn't be happier about how it turned out. Once our child actually started to attend and loved it so much, and the other parents were so welcoming, we realized how lucky we were to be there. Our next child had more acceptances (including some that were among our favorites the first time, but we chose to remain.

[Anonymous]

Ugh. Just as I was coming to terms with this, DC said today, "I wish I could walk to school. If you had picked Beauvoir, I could walk. But you picked X."

I guess at least I should be happy that she thinks it was up to us!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. Just as I was coming to terms with this, DC said today, "I wish I could walk to school. If you had picked Beauvoir, I could walk. But you picked X."

I guess at least I should be happy that she thinks it was up to us!

This probably the cutest post I have read in a while. Children say the darnest things. Just when we think we know what is best they put a monkey wrench in the plan. Good Luck at the school you will be driving to

[Anonymous]

Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Start by reading this forum on a regular basis. Assuming your backup school isn't one of the Big Three, you'll likely find many weekly posts that make it clear why getting waitlisted at one of the Big Three was a blessing in disguise, how you basically dodged a bullet, and you'll start to appreciate the many benefits of your lower profile backup.