Should I Call CPS on Husband

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe OP should go to a parenting therapist and then she could report all the therapist says to the husband including the possible consequences.

It is possible that the husband is oblivious to what can and will happen so he HARSHLY overdisciplining the kids to everyone detriment.

This is not going to end well for the kids, the parents, the whole family as a unit.

Also many guys have NO concept of what is right and wrong way to discipline kids, and they have
zero concept of child development and have no concept of disciplining.

They should take some parenting class pronto! to learn the RIGHT ways to discipline kids.

There is a need to discipline if boundaries are crossed, but the discipline needs to be fair, and age appropriate and not abusive.

The difference between discipline and abuse is that abuse is "cruel and unusual" discipline.


What good is to discipline kids to the point of hating parents so much and throwing away all the
love and parental work? Put well being of children first!

OP, can also go to parental class herself to learn proper ways and techniques of age appropriate
discipline and then she will speak to the husband from the place of knowing per being
educated if just a normal mothering is not enough for him.

The bolded is not an excuse in his case. OP has repeatedly told him to stop. He should have done some research by now. Any research would quickly lead him to concluding that his actions are not acceptable in this society. He has some serious issues.

In child welfare, most of the head of household are women, not men. Most parents parent like they were parented. OP isn't saying what her style is but it may be equally abusive. Most parents yell. Most parents hit their kids. If CPS removed every child from those situations, most kids would be in care. Its BAD parenting, but it isn't crossing the line of abuse.

What op describes goes well beyond the normal range even for families that use corporal punishment. Repeatedly hitting very young children on the head is not normal nor widely culturally accepted. It’s entirely different than a “swat on the butt” (which is bad parenting but typical in some subcultures.)

OP made one post with no other explanations. Others are jumping to conclusions. Most parents in the US use the same discipline.

This is false. Most parents in the US don’t use corporal punishment. This is really only common nowadays among parents who were abused themselves as children and typically in lower socioeconomic circles because of lack of education and other resources.

Yes, they do but its more secret now. Its not just poor folks but keep telling yourself that.

[Anonymous]

This is absolutely disgusting. I can't even unread this. You do realize that corporal punishment of children is considered abuse in most other countries in the world. Please leave this man OP. How can you allow him to treat your children like this?!

[Anonymous]

Start a plan now.

I’m sure you’ve talk til you’re blue in the face so plan for what’s next.

-decide where you can go (friends/family) for a longer length of time if needed
-find a couples, family and child therapists. All will be needed
-move money if need be
-find parenting courses for you both

All of you need therapy, and if your husband isn’t willing to do both parenting classes and therapy (self and couples), then you need to decide the next steps which could include leaving your husband.

This will definitely take strength on your part, even when you feel emotionally, mentally and physically tired. You definitely need self therapy for yourself, even just for the strength having someone in your corner can bring

[Anonymous]

Sorry, you are going through this OP. Hitting kids and then minimizing your concerns is sort of gaslighting, so I'd suggest you also have a deep look at his attitude towards you. CPS, therapy, separation - all your options are hard, but the hardest and worst one would be to stay in the current situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm at wits end with my husband’s methods of physical discipline. There is entirely too much yelling & screaming in our house and I’m fed up with him putting his hands on them as punishment. Some examples: slapping back of child’s head (sometimes repeatedly), yanking kid up by arm, pulling ear tightly and talking directly into ear, and spanking bare bottom until red marks. Kids are 8 and 5.

He does not think he is doing anything wrong. When I complain he basically says “I’m not hurting them, and I will discipline my kids!”

Yes. And I am also concerned about your safety. Does he behave similarly with you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm at wits end with my husband’s methods of physical discipline. There is entirely too much yelling & screaming in our house and I’m fed up with him putting his hands on them as punishment. Some examples: slapping back of child’s head (sometimes repeatedly), yanking kid up by arm, pulling ear tightly and talking directly into ear, and spanking bare bottom until red marks. Kids are 8 and 5.

He does not think he is doing anything wrong. When I complain he basically says “I’m not hurting them, and I will discipline my kids!”

Yes. And I am also concerned about your safety. Does he behave similarly with you?

It’s only a matter of time before he starts hitting you in anger as well, especially if you try to step in when he’s out of control.

A domestic abuse hotline will help you decide whether the abuse of the children rises to the level of calling CPS right away, or if building a more gradual plan to remove you and them from the situation might be a safer way to go. They can help you with all the steps, provide perspective, legal advice, and even emergency shelter if things ever escalate to the point of serious danger.

1-800-799-7233 is a national domestic violence hotline, but they can put you in touch with someone local if that’s appropriate. Take that first step, and reach out to someone who understands very well everything you’re dealing with, and knows how to help. You have a chance to break the cycle before it escalates, so don’t wait.