If DH just informed wants divorce…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No he's not legally entitled to enroll them in another state. Their home remains with the OP and in her state. If he claimed otherwise he would be committing fraud upon that school district.

How would it be fraud? They are legally dad’s children, and dad can legally have a different primary residence from mom, even if they’re married.

Dads new residence in an other state doesn't automatically become the children's residence.

It does if he moved them there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP should not wait for him to file. She should file for two things:

1) Temporary custody orders that prevent the children from spending the night, or more than a certain number of nights out of state without written consent from the other parent.

2) Freezing bank accounts and assets.

She should also consider that, unless there is abuse, it will be in the best interest of the kids to spend time with both parents. If he's moving out of state, then extended stays during school breaks, that start now while they're still used to living with him, are probably going to be part of that. So, the goal probably shouldn't be to prevent him from taking them to the new state for a visit this summer. It should be to make sure that if he takes them, he takes them with official documentation that he has committed to returning them on a certain date, and a court order that means that if he tries to keep them and enroll them in school in the other state he is in contempt.

And yes, there's a good chance that he is already planning to return them, probably even better than the chance that he isn't. But as parents we take steps all the time to prevent unlikely occurrences. It's unlikely that your kid will be in an accident on their bike today, but you probably still make them wear a helmet, because bike crashes are real possibilities, even if they happen less than 50%. There is a real possibility that he is trying to position himself for primary custody, and OP should protect against that.

Excellent advice, every word.

There has to be a factual basis for these allegations or else OP will end up losing the motion and paying her husband's attorneys fees for a bad faith filing.

All the husband ever said is he is leaving her and wants to take the kids for part of the summer. He didn't threaten her. He didn't threaten them.

You file for divorce and propose a temporary custody plan. If he's not planning on taking them and not coming back, he signs and there's no problem. If he refuses to do that but just says he's planning on taking the kids out of state indefinitely, there's no bad faith filing in getting an order prohibiting that. You say, truthfully, that you are concerned about him not coming back because he refused to agree to a temporary custody plan saying he wouldn't do that.

There are any number of reasons he might not agree to a custody plan proposed by OPs lawyer that are not nefarious on his part. Do you actually expect her attorney to be totally fair to both sides in drafting his proposal?

If she files a TRO with zero factual basis she is going to have to testify why she is afraid he will take the kids out of state indefinitely.

If there is no evidence that that is his intention then she will have to explain why it will not be in the kids beat interests for Dad to have them for say half the summer.

Since OP has said absolutely nothing to suggest that her husband isn't a good parent to the child, imnit sure what that would be. It can't be just because he's a man.

OP has to be very careful with her credibility in front of the judge. Making hysterical unfounded allegations against the other parent in a divorce case is no bueno nowadays

Saying " But the bitter divorcees on DCUM told.me tondo this," is not a good plan.

You don’t know what you’re talking about. Getting a temporary custody order is not the same as a TRO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP should not wait for him to file. She should file for two things:

1) Temporary custody orders that prevent the children from spending the night, or more than a certain number of nights out of state without written consent from the other parent.

2) Freezing bank accounts and assets.

She should also consider that, unless there is abuse, it will be in the best interest of the kids to spend time with both parents. If he's moving out of state, then extended stays during school breaks, that start now while they're still used to living with him, are probably going to be part of that. So, the goal probably shouldn't be to prevent him from taking them to the new state for a visit this summer. It should be to make sure that if he takes them, he takes them with official documentation that he has committed to returning them on a certain date, and a court order that means that if he tries to keep them and enroll them in school in the other state he is in contempt.

And yes, there's a good chance that he is already planning to return them, probably even better than the chance that he isn't. But as parents we take steps all the time to prevent unlikely occurrences. It's unlikely that your kid will be in an accident on their bike today, but you probably still make them wear a helmet, because bike crashes are real possibilities, even if they happen less than 50%. There is a real possibility that he is trying to position himself for primary custody, and OP should protect against that.

Excellent advice, every word.

There has to be a factual basis for these allegations or else OP will end up losing the motion and paying her husband's attorneys fees for a bad faith filing.

All the husband ever said is he is leaving her and wants to take the kids for part of the summer. He didn't threaten her. He didn't threaten them.

What? No. You don’t need to prove anything to get a temporary custody order. He said he wants to divorce, wants to take the kids out of state, and wants to move. That’s more than enough to get a temporary order that requires the other parent’s consent for out of state visits.

LOL no
A temporary order will dictate who gets the children when and where. Not OP. He won't need to ask her permission either the judge will allow it or he won't. If she makes allegations that he should not be allowed to take them out of state at all because he intends to not return them, she better have more than DCUM to back up that claim

I’m not sure what your agenda is here. The temporary order would set out a schedule (including vacations) that each party has to file. It would solve any issue of the ex moving the kids because he would be bound to bring them back. OP wouldn’t have to allege or prove anything about her fears he intends to keep them out of state. It could also spell out that any out of state travel has to be agreed to by each parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No he's not legally entitled to enroll them in another state. Their home remains with the OP and in her state. If he claimed otherwise he would be committing fraud upon that school district.

Dude, illegals show up at schools insider spring every week of the year and havent enrolled there properly nor unenrolled in their homeland. No one bats an eye.

Maybe the guy went online and already unenrolled his kids for next year.

Kids primary residency is established by where they permanently lived and were attending school. The marital home. And schools would request mother consent to enrollment . He can’t “establish” a new residency because he just wants it to be a different state. No.

OP needs to file and indicate where the kids current residency is . Also a good idea would be contacting all schools in a country where husband intends to live and inform the schools that mother consent wasn’t given.

Kids are enrolled in school by one parent all the time. Kids who are enrolled in school, get enrolled in another school all the time. The unenrollment happens when the new school requests records from the old school.

He has 100% rights until there is a court order that changes that. He's not going to file for a court order that takes away his custody and rights, so if OP wants to limit those right, she needs to file

Of course when that parent has a sole custody they can enroll. But as a general matter both parents should sign the enrollment forms . I dealt with similar cases.

OP does need to file go re divorce and this will confirm legally the current status quo with kids permanent residency /marital home

Do you work at a public school? The vast majority of times one parent comes in and fills out the forms.

Yes both public and private now ask for both parents. If they don’t - OP should notify the schools in that other state/country asap . That’s the purpose of reaching out while it’s all being resolved

DH NEVER signed anything in DCPS.

Since you said "DH" I assume you were married and shared a household. You did provide them with his info no doubt and it was same address as yours and the kids. Probably a different outcome of you had told them he was living in a different state and you were separated. They probably would have asked for a copy of the custody order. The schools do want to be involved in the petty squabbles of divorcing parents who can't get along with each other. Too much liability

That's what's going to happen if ops husband tries to enroll the kids in a different state.

You have no idea what you are talking about.

[Anonymous]

I have enrolled my kid in public school and they never asked if we were married or where the other parent lives. I had to prove residency for myself and a birth certificate for the kid. A parent who moved could easily provide that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have enrolled my kid in public school and they never asked if we were married or where the other parent lives. I had to prove residency for myself and a birth certificate for the kid. A parent who moved could easily provide that.

You didn't list any emergency contacts?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No he's not legally entitled to enroll them in another state. Their home remains with the OP and in her state. If he claimed otherwise he would be committing fraud upon that school district.

Dude, illegals show up at schools insider spring every week of the year and havent enrolled there properly nor unenrolled in their homeland. No one bats an eye.

Maybe the guy went online and already unenrolled his kids for next year.

Kids primary residency is established by where they permanently lived and were attending school. The marital home. And schools would request mother consent to enrollment . He can’t “establish” a new residency because he just wants it to be a different state. No.

OP needs to file and indicate where the kids current residency is . Also a good idea would be contacting all schools in a country where husband intends to live and inform the schools that mother consent wasn’t given.

Kids are enrolled in school by one parent all the time. Kids who are enrolled in school, get enrolled in another school all the time. The unenrollment happens when the new school requests records from the old school.

He has 100% rights until there is a court order that changes that. He's not going to file for a court order that takes away his custody and rights, so if OP wants to limit those right, she needs to file

Of course when that parent has a sole custody they can enroll. But as a general matter both parents should sign the enrollment forms . I dealt with similar cases.

OP does need to file go re divorce and this will confirm legally the current status quo with kids permanent residency /marital home

Do you work at a public school? The vast majority of times one parent comes in and fills out the forms.

Yes both public and private now ask for both parents. If they don’t - OP should notify the schools in that other state/country asap . That’s the purpose of reaching out while it’s all being resolved

DH NEVER signed anything in DCPS.

Since you said "DH" I assume you were married and shared a household. You did provide them with his info no doubt and it was same address as yours and the kids. Probably a different outcome of you had told them he was living in a different state and you were separated. They probably would have asked for a copy of the custody order. The schools do want to be involved in the petty squabbles of divorcing parents who can't get along with each other. Too much liability

That's what's going to happen if ops husband tries to enroll the kids in a different state.

What kind of ex husband is going to volunteer that information? He can just enroll them in school with his new address and omit DW's info altogether. He doesn't need to say "in the process of divorce" at the time of enrollment. And if he doesn't want the prior school notified, he can easily write "homeschooled" on the form.

And such lying and fraud will cost him custody altogether when found in discovery. The default rule is the kids' permanent residency is where they lived with parents (marital home) for 6 months preceding separation. There is plentiful evidence - e.g. kids went to school, attended after school classes, ate and slept at the marital home

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have enrolled my kid in public school and they never asked if we were married or where the other parent lives. I had to prove residency for myself and a birth certificate for the kid. A parent who moved could easily provide that.

You didn't list any emergency contacts?

For proving residency for enrollment? Absolutely not. There are specific documents you have to provide. That's all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No he's not legally entitled to enroll them in another state. Their home remains with the OP and in her state. If he claimed otherwise he would be committing fraud upon that school district.

Dude, illegals show up at schools insider spring every week of the year and havent enrolled there properly nor unenrolled in their homeland. No one bats an eye.

Maybe the guy went online and already unenrolled his kids for next year.

Kids primary residency is established by where they permanently lived and were attending school. The marital home. And schools would request mother consent to enrollment . He can’t “establish” a new residency because he just wants it to be a different state. No.

OP needs to file and indicate where the kids current residency is . Also a good idea would be contacting all schools in a country where husband intends to live and inform the schools that mother consent wasn’t given.

Kids are enrolled in school by one parent all the time. Kids who are enrolled in school, get enrolled in another school all the time. The unenrollment happens when the new school requests records from the old school.

He has 100% rights until there is a court order that changes that. He's not going to file for a court order that takes away his custody and rights, so if OP wants to limit those right, she needs to file

Of course when that parent has a sole custody they can enroll. But as a general matter both parents should sign the enrollment forms . I dealt with similar cases.

OP does need to file go re divorce and this will confirm legally the current status quo with kids permanent residency /marital home

Do you work at a public school? The vast majority of times one parent comes in and fills out the forms.

Yes both public and private now ask for both parents. If they don’t - OP should notify the schools in that other state/country asap . That’s the purpose of reaching out while it’s all being resolved

DH NEVER signed anything in DCPS.

Since you said "DH" I assume you were married and shared a household. You did provide them with his info no doubt and it was same address as yours and the kids. Probably a different outcome of you had told them he was living in a different state and you were separated. They probably would have asked for a copy of the custody order. The schools do want to be involved in the petty squabbles of divorcing parents who can't get along with each other. Too much liability

That's what's going to happen if ops husband tries to enroll the kids in a different state.

What kind of ex husband is going to volunteer that information? He can just enroll them in school with his new address and omit DW's info altogether. He doesn't need to say "in the process of divorce" at the time of enrollment. And if he doesn't want the prior school notified, he can easily write "homeschooled" on the form.

And such lying and fraud will cost him custody altogether when found in discovery. The default rule is the kids' permanent residency is where they lived with parents (marital home) for 6 months preceding separation. There is plentiful evidence - e.g. kids went to school, attended after school classes, ate and slept at the marital home

It's not fraudulent to claim you live somewhere that you actually live and enroll your kids in school there. Six months has nothing to do with where you're allowed to enroll your kids in school. The judge may not like it if you move away and lie about your intent to come back, but there's no fraud.

[Anonymous]

OP still hasn't even claimed, much less provided any proof that, her husband has any intention of doing exactly what he said: wanting to have the kids at his new residence for part of the summer.

But before spending lots of money on attorneys OP just have ask him to send you an email explaining what his plans are for the kids over the summer, the dates he wants to have them with him, how he will care for them especially when he is at work, etc. Also what his back up is in the event of an emergency. We don't even know how far away this other state is. Do you even have his new address? Send an email. Give him a few days to respond and if he doesn't answer, or his answer is unsatisfactory, THEN you have something solid that your attorney can use to support an application for a TRO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have enrolled my kid in public school and they never asked if we were married or where the other parent lives. I had to prove residency for myself and a birth certificate for the kid. A parent who moved could easily provide that.

You didn't list any emergency contacts?

He doesn't need to list the other parent as the emergency contact? And emergency contacts wouldn't even be contacted when the child is enrolled in a new school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have enrolled my kid in public school and they never asked if we were married or where the other parent lives. I had to prove residency for myself and a birth certificate for the kid. A parent who moved could easily provide that.

You didn't list any emergency contacts?

You don’t have to list the other parent as an emergency contact. The schools don’t actually want to get into your family business - as long as they are satisfied you are the kid’s parent or guardian and you reside in the school district, that’s enough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP still hasn't even claimed, much less provided any proof that, her husband has any intention of doing exactly what he said: wanting to have the kids at his new residence for part of the summer.

But before spending lots of money on attorneys OP just have ask him to send you an email explaining what his plans are for the kids over the summer, the dates he wants to have them with him, how he will care for them especially when he is at work, etc. Also what his back up is in the event of an emergency. We don't even know how far away this other state is. Do you even have his new address? Send an email. Give him a few days to respond and if he doesn't answer, or his answer is unsatisfactory, THEN you have something solid that your attorney can use to support an application for a TRO.

That’s stupid. And you still don’t get the difference between a TRO and a temporary custody order.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP still hasn't even claimed, much less provided any proof that, her husband has any intention of doing exactly what he said: wanting to have the kids at his new residence for part of the summer.

But before spending lots of money on attorneys OP just have ask him to send you an email explaining what his plans are for the kids over the summer, the dates he wants to have them with him, how he will care for them especially when he is at work, etc. Also what his back up is in the event of an emergency. We don't even know how far away this other state is. Do you even have his new address? Send an email. Give him a few days to respond and if he doesn't answer, or his answer is unsatisfactory, THEN you have something solid that your attorney can use to support an application for a TRO.

An email is not a temporary custody order and he will not be in contempt if he violates it. If he agrees to plans she's ok with, great. Now she can file and they can both sign the custody order.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No he's not legally entitled to enroll them in another state. Their home remains with the OP and in her state. If he claimed otherwise he would be committing fraud upon that school district.

Dude, illegals show up at schools insider spring every week of the year and havent enrolled there properly nor unenrolled in their homeland. No one bats an eye.

Maybe the guy went online and already unenrolled his kids for next year.

Kids primary residency is established by where they permanently lived and were attending school. The marital home. And schools would request mother consent to enrollment . He can’t “establish” a new residency because he just wants it to be a different state. No.

OP needs to file and indicate where the kids current residency is . Also a good idea would be contacting all schools in a country where husband intends to live and inform the schools that mother consent wasn’t given.

Kids are enrolled in school by one parent all the time. Kids who are enrolled in school, get enrolled in another school all the time. The unenrollment happens when the new school requests records from the old school.

He has 100% rights until there is a court order that changes that. He's not going to file for a court order that takes away his custody and rights, so if OP wants to limit those right, she needs to file

Of course when that parent has a sole custody they can enroll. But as a general matter both parents should sign the enrollment forms . I dealt with similar cases.

OP does need to file go re divorce and this will confirm legally the current status quo with kids permanent residency /marital home

Do you work at a public school? The vast majority of times one parent comes in and fills out the forms.

Yes both public and private now ask for both parents. If they don’t - OP should notify the schools in that other state/country asap . That’s the purpose of reaching out while it’s all being resolved

DH NEVER signed anything in DCPS.

Since you said "DH" I assume you were married and shared a household. You did provide them with his info no doubt and it was same address as yours and the kids. Probably a different outcome of you had told them he was living in a different state and you were separated. They probably would have asked for a copy of the custody order. The schools do want to be involved in the petty squabbles of divorcing parents who can't get along with each other. Too much liability

That's what's going to happen if ops husband tries to enroll the kids in a different state.

What kind of ex husband is going to volunteer that information? He can just enroll them in school with his new address and omit DW's info altogether. He doesn't need to say "in the process of divorce" at the time of enrollment. And if he doesn't want the prior school notified, he can easily write "homeschooled" on the form.

And such lying and fraud will cost him custody altogether when found in discovery. The default rule is the kids' permanent residency is where they lived with parents (marital home) for 6 months preceding separation. There is plentiful evidence - e.g. kids went to school, attended after school classes, ate and slept at the marital home

It's not fraudulent to claim you live somewhere that you actually live and enroll your kids in school there. Six months has nothing to do with where you're allowed to enroll your kids in school. The judge may not like it if you move away and lie about your intent to come back, but there's no fraud.

You suggested to omit his separated status and the kids mother on application. Absolutely all educational and after school establishments ask for both parents names and contacts as well as marital status in the enrollment forms.