ILs take/divide up leftovers without asking

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For the one (probably greedy boomer) who says just double up it’s easy, it’s clear you aren’t the host. Thanksgiving for a crowd of poorly behaved animals is already a ton of work. Cooking an extra turkey, doubling or really tripling the potatoes, stuffing, gravy, cranberry, pies etc etc so the “guests” aka invaders can be fed leftovers the next day and take back heaping portions is a ton more work.

I honestly think it’s an aspect of boomers who are inherently selfish and greedy losing their filters and making sure they get theirs and no one else does.

I am 40 and I am team “just provide more food.” I think it is the martyr generation who thinks of hosting as such a burden. If you already don’t want people “invading” your house and you are already fed up, then everything will seem like a problem and imposition.

There is no need to buy two turkeys and no need to double everything. But there are many ways to give the ILs a doggie bag pretty easily.

You seem to have a listening problem. If you have overnight guests and plan to offer/left overs the next day then unless you double your amounts there is nothing left for greedy FIL/MIL who already snatched up containers full of food. You would be stuck explaining to rude guests that no they can’t have any leftover because the greedy boomers grabbed them already. You are stuck making more meals for rude people. The alternative is to double but that is a lot of work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH and I cook huge quantities for TG and ask our guests to bring their own tupperware, freezer packs etc. Then all of us divvy up the food for everyone. The last thing that my family wants is to eat TG leftovers for more than one meal the next day.

OP, try doubling up the TG meal quantities. It is wonderful that people want to eat the leftovers. You can send them back home with a taste of the holidays. Food for me is the universal language of love.

As a guest, I’d be uncomfortable showing up with Tupperware and freezer packs. I’d probably just say I forgot to bring them and thank you for the offer.

We go to very good friends' most years for thanksgivings, and bring 3-4 dishes, including the main dish (usually a tenderloin or a rib roast, no one likes turkey). We happily bring containers for leftovers, and bring home some (not all) of whatever is left, whether we made it or not.

It never occurred to me that I should be uncomfortable about this. Of course, none of us are uptight snots, either.

Did your host ask you to bring containers? You certainly sound like a rude snot. I can not imagine bringing my own containers to someone’s house and filling them up on the way out.

If your host offers, then it is fine! If you host tells everyone to bring containers, it’s fine! If not then you are a pig.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh mattress.

Yes - I guess she dragged that out as well.

It's honestly been about 27 years, so the details are fuzzy. But the entire bed was gone. She was a young grandma at the time.

Susan has done a LOT of weird things, so I actually forgot about her stealing our furniture. We only see her at weddings, funerals, etc.

Another LOL. For gifts, she would give restaurant gift cards. But she would put $2 on each card. So for your birthday, you would get $2 to spend Texas Roadhouse or the like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP is the disturbed one here. She WENT and took BACK the leftovers her in-laws took out of their tupperware containers to reserve????? Talk about hostile!!!!!!!!!

She was perfectly within her rights. If someone takes $50 from me and puts it in their purse, I’m going in to take what’s mine.

+1. Plus, she did so to FEED ALL THE GUESTS STILL IN HER HOUSE, which include two adults who are not the FIL/MIL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For the one (probably greedy boomer) who says just double up it’s easy, it’s clear you aren’t the host. Thanksgiving for a crowd of poorly behaved animals is already a ton of work. Cooking an extra turkey, doubling or really tripling the potatoes, stuffing, gravy, cranberry, pies etc etc so the “guests” aka invaders can be fed leftovers the next day and take back heaping portions is a ton more work.

I honestly think it’s an aspect of boomers who are inherently selfish and greedy losing their filters and making sure they get theirs and no one else does.

I am 40 and I am team “just provide more food.” I think it is the martyr generation who thinks of hosting as such a burden. If you already don’t want people “invading” your house and you are already fed up, then everything will seem like a problem and imposition.

There is no need to buy two turkeys and no need to double everything. But there are many ways to give the ILs a doggie bag pretty easily.

You seem to have a listening problem. If you have overnight guests and plan to offer/left overs the next day then unless you double your amounts there is nothing left for greedy FIL/MIL who already snatched up containers full of food. You would be stuck explaining to rude guests that no they can’t have any leftover because the greedy boomers grabbed them already. You are stuck making more meals for rude people. The alternative is to double but that is a lot of work.

Thank you for today’s lesson in martyr math!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For the one (probably greedy boomer) who says just double up it’s easy, it’s clear you aren’t the host. Thanksgiving for a crowd of poorly behaved animals is already a ton of work. Cooking an extra turkey, doubling or really tripling the potatoes, stuffing, gravy, cranberry, pies etc etc so the “guests” aka invaders can be fed leftovers the next day and take back heaping portions is a ton more work.

I honestly think it’s an aspect of boomers who are inherently selfish and greedy losing their filters and making sure they get theirs and no one else does.

We went out to dinner and my father ate his 8 year old grandsons meal while he was in the bathroom because "it looked like he was done, and I paid for it."
He also inherited thousands of antique gold coins from his own father and sold every last one for cash. He did not save a single solitary coin for his grandkids.

This makes me appreciate my own parents more, who will watch my kids for an evening and send them home with some random family trinket/memorabilia and lunch for the next day. I was kind of irritated with my dad for sending my 4 year old home with a full sized commemorative BASEBALL BAT, but you're making me soften on that stance.

[Anonymous]

Make more food or ask inlaws to bring more food to share.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make more food or ask inlaws to bring more food to share.

No. Instead we must have some weird power play with Tupperware over gummy old potatoes and stale turkey. To the victor go the spoils. What a hollow victory.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They sound poorly bred.

Probably deplorables

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG. I thought my family was dysfunctional but I can’t even imagine fighting over leftovers. You all sound low class.

It's some wanna be rich thing to be fretting about your own family being "low class". They are cut from the same cloth even if OP is putting on airs about being classy when she wants to hoard leftovers for herself. None of this is classy.

No, you lack class just like the people described in these posts. Op isn't hoarding leftovers. She has guests to feed the next day. That isn't hoarding leftovers idiot. That such an obvious deceitful take on what op is describing. It's clear you're a parasite and these posts are making you realize what a leach we all think you are.

This. What I'm picturing in my head is that the people still staying at OP's house on the Friday or Saturday want some thanksgiving leftovers. There are leftovers still in the fridge, but the guests and OP can't have them because MIL 'reserved' them to take home in a few days. That's quite frankly nuts and rude. Until the guests have left, the leftovers should be for everyone to share.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m happy to give folks leftovers and don’t really consider my parents guests; they are family. Seems like you’ve let this go on long enough that they think it’s fine. I’d be embarrassed to have an issue now, after a long time; my parents would probably think we were having money troubles. However he frames it, they are going to find you stingy and rude. Sounds like a very awkward Thanksgiving.

Um I would think my parents were “having money troubles” if they whip out their Tupperware from home at the end of Thanksgiving dinner to start shoving it into boxes to “claim” it so they can take it with them to eat at home three days later

I would play this up -- take back th leftovers but give the ILs a grocery store gift card and say you noticed they're having money troubles I'd also offer to take them to a financial planner who works with the elderly and ask if they want me/spouse to take a look at their records

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG. I thought my family was dysfunctional but I can’t even imagine fighting over leftovers. You all sound low class.

It's some wanna be rich thing to be fretting about your own family being "low class". They are cut from the same cloth even if OP is putting on airs about being classy when she wants to hoard leftovers for herself. None of this is classy.

No, you lack class just like the people described in these posts. Op isn't hoarding leftovers. She has guests to feed the next day. That isn't hoarding leftovers idiot. That such an obvious deceitful take on what op is describing. It's clear you're a parasite and these posts are making you realize what a leach we all think you are.

This. What I'm picturing in my head is that the people still staying at OP's house on the Friday or Saturday want some thanksgiving leftovers. There are leftovers still in the fridge, but the guests and OP can't have them because MIL 'reserved' them to take home in a few days. That's quite frankly nuts and rude. Until the guests have left, the leftovers should be for everyone to share.

BINGO. You understood the assignment perfectly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG. I thought my family was dysfunctional but I can’t even imagine fighting over leftovers. You all sound low class.

It's some wanna be rich thing to be fretting about your own family being "low class". They are cut from the same cloth even if OP is putting on airs about being classy when she wants to hoard leftovers for herself. None of this is classy.

No, you lack class just like the people described in these posts. Op isn't hoarding leftovers. She has guests to feed the next day. That isn't hoarding leftovers idiot. That such an obvious deceitful take on what op is describing. It's clear you're a parasite and these posts are making you realize what a leach we all think you are.

This. What I'm picturing in my head is that the people still staying at OP's house on the Friday or Saturday want some thanksgiving leftovers. There are leftovers still in the fridge, but the guests and OP can't have them because MIL 'reserved' them to take home in a few days. That's quite frankly nuts and rude. Until the guests have left, the leftovers should be for everyone to share.

So you're saying the ILs forego their own leftovers and let them sit for days until they finally go home? That's not very credible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG. I thought my family was dysfunctional but I can’t even imagine fighting over leftovers. You all sound low class.

It's some wanna be rich thing to be fretting about your own family being "low class". They are cut from the same cloth even if OP is putting on airs about being classy when she wants to hoard leftovers for herself. None of this is classy.

No, you lack class just like the people described in these posts. Op isn't hoarding leftovers. She has guests to feed the next day. That isn't hoarding leftovers idiot. That such an obvious deceitful take on what op is describing. It's clear you're a parasite and these posts are making you realize what a leach we all think you are.

This. What I'm picturing in my head is that the people still staying at OP's house on the Friday or Saturday want some thanksgiving leftovers. There are leftovers still in the fridge, but the guests and OP can't have them because MIL 'reserved' them to take home in a few days. That's quite frankly nuts and rude. Until the guests have left, the leftovers should be for everyone to share.

So you're saying the ILs forego their own leftovers and let them sit for days until they finally go home? That's not very credible.

OP said that the next night she went into the IL’s containers to offer everyone leftovers, and they objected. So it certainly looks as if they are letting them sit for at least 36 hours until they leave on Saturday or later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG. I thought my family was dysfunctional but I can’t even imagine fighting over leftovers. You all sound low class.

It's some wanna be rich thing to be fretting about your own family being "low class". They are cut from the same cloth even if OP is putting on airs about being classy when she wants to hoard leftovers for herself. None of this is classy.

No, you lack class just like the people described in these posts. Op isn't hoarding leftovers. She has guests to feed the next day. That isn't hoarding leftovers idiot. That such an obvious deceitful take on what op is describing. It's clear you're a parasite and these posts are making you realize what a leach we all think you are.

This. What I'm picturing in my head is that the people still staying at OP's house on the Friday or Saturday want some thanksgiving leftovers. There are leftovers still in the fridge, but the guests and OP can't have them because MIL 'reserved' them to take home in a few days. That's quite frankly nuts and rude. Until the guests have left, the leftovers should be for everyone to share.

So you're saying the ILs forego their own leftovers and let them sit for days until they finally go home? That's not very credible.

I'm not OP, so I wouldn't know. I'm just creating scenarios from the available information. It sounded to me like the leftovers would normally provide 1.5 meals for everyone staying at OP's house, like a full leftover dinner on Friday and turkey sandwiches on Saturday. If MIL grabs half for herself, then there isn't even quite a full meal for everyone on Friday, assuming that MIL is eating from OP's leftover stash and not her own. So OP has to provide even more food for everyone, while MIL's reserved food sits in the fridge, off limits to everyone.

It's still rude, but at least in the realm of normal to help yourself to some leftovers when you're leaving the host's house. It's weird and horribly rude to claim leftovers to take home days later when you're still staying at the host's house, and when other people there might want to eat "your" leftovers that are sitting in the host's fridge.