Missed deadline for parenting class in divorce- how bad is this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The process is annoying, but having children in your care can be annoying and unpredictable and they will mess with your schedule. You have to show that you can handle this. Nothing you're saying would convince me.

I think that they will actually affect my schedule far less if I can get 50/50 and know when I need to be responsible for them and then be able to focus on work the rest of the time, and if anything I will be a better parent after divorce because I will not have my focus split all of the time between two things.

What two things is your focus being split between now?

Also, did you not know the time of the parenting class? I am confused.

There were different class times to sign up for but I didn't realize how it worked until it was too late; I assumed my attorney would present me with options and make sure I took care of it.

My focus now is being split between family and work. I think that 50/50 custody would let me go all-in at work when I don't have the kids and be more present for them when I do, and I think it will be better for them than before divorce.

How quickly does everyone think this guy will remarry? He literally needs someone holding his hand at all times, telling him what to do. How on earth do you even have a job if you can’t think for yourself?!

A female books his work travel. Takes his phone calls when he is in the road. Vacuums his office. Makes his hotel bed. Cooks his food and washes his clothes.

That is how he does it.

In the process of divorcing a guy like this right now. I think he filed because my job ramped up and he was astonished that he would need to step up at home.

He hired a female attorney and I was like, yup, checks out, another woman paid to deal with his messes for him. He must be paying a fortune because she’s definitely composing my DH’s emails and texts for him, even dumb stuff like asking if I’ve seen his windshield scraper. And like OP, my DH sincerely believes that 50/50 is doable as long as I “understand his busy schedule”. Hahahaha. He’s already flubbed so much visitation time as it is and we don’t even have a parenting plan yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The process is annoying, but having children in your care can be annoying and unpredictable and they will mess with your schedule. You have to show that you can handle this. Nothing you're saying would convince me.

I think that they will actually affect my schedule far less if I can get 50/50 and know when I need to be responsible for them and then be able to focus on work the rest of the time, and if anything I will be a better parent after divorce because I will not have my focus split all of the time between two things.

What two things is your focus being split between now?

Also, did you not know the time of the parenting class? I am confused.

There were different class times to sign up for but I didn't realize how it worked until it was too late; I assumed my attorney would present me with options and make sure I took care of it.

My focus now is being split between family and work. I think that 50/50 custody would let me go all-in at work when I don't have the kids and be more present for them when I do, and I think it will be better for them than before divorce.

How quickly does everyone think this guy will remarry? He literally needs someone holding his hand at all times, telling him what to do. How on earth do you even have a job if you can’t think for yourself?!

A female books his work travel. Takes his phone calls when he is in the road. Vacuums his office. Makes his hotel bed. Cooks his food and washes his clothes.

That is how he does it.

In the process of divorcing a guy like this right now. I think he filed because my job ramped up and he was astonished that he would need to step up at home.

He hired a female attorney and I was like, yup, checks out, another woman paid to deal with his messes for him. He must be paying a fortune because she’s definitely composing my DH’s emails and texts for him, even dumb stuff like asking if I’ve seen his windshield scraper. And like OP, my DH sincerely believes that 50/50 is doable as long as I “understand his busy schedule”. Hahahaha. He’s already flubbed so much visitation time as it is and we don’t even have a parenting plan yet.

Is he sleeping with her?! It costs more to pay an attorney to compose an email than to buy multiple new scrapers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For someone mandated to take a parenting class whose first instinct is to blame his attorney, I'm going to guess it won't go well for you.

The best you can do is register right now, today, with a start date as soon as possible and show the court you are working in good faith to correct YOUR error.

You may also want to look at your tendency to overlook deadlines and shift blame. You may find other things that will help you improve yourself and your co-parenting abilities.

I've been really busy with travel and work and I really don't think it should be held against me if I'm the higher earning and primary provider for the family. DW has time to do it on time because she doesn't do anything.

You should explain this to the judge, just like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For someone mandated to take a parenting class whose first instinct is to blame his attorney, I'm going to guess it won't go well for you.

The best you can do is register right now, today, with a start date as soon as possible and show the court you are working in good faith to correct YOUR error.

You may also want to look at your tendency to overlook deadlines and shift blame. You may find other things that will help you improve yourself and your co-parenting abilities.

I've been really busy with travel and work and I really don't think it should be held against me if I'm the higher earning and primary provider for the family. DW has time to do it on time because she doesn't do anything.

You should explain this to the judge, just like that.

[Anonymous]

(PS: Say it twice, PP! )

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For someone mandated to take a parenting class whose first instinct is to blame his attorney, I'm going to guess it won't go well for you.

The best you can do is register right now, today, with a start date as soon as possible and show the court you are working in good faith to correct YOUR error.

You may also want to look at your tendency to overlook deadlines and shift blame. You may find other things that will help you improve yourself and your co-parenting abilities.

I've been really busy with travel and work and I really don't think it should be held against me if I'm the higher earning and primary provider for the family. DW has time to do it on time because she doesn't do anything.

You should explain this to the judge, just like that.

He should follow it up with the comment about how having children on weeknights is “easy” and that his ex should be happy not to be “burdened”’with having to do fun things with children on weekends.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The process is annoying, but having children in your care can be annoying and unpredictable and they will mess with your schedule. You have to show that you can handle this. Nothing you're saying would convince me.

I think that they will actually affect my schedule far less if I can get 50/50 and know when I need to be responsible for them and then be able to focus on work the rest of the time, and if anything I will be a better parent after divorce because I will not have my focus split all of the time between two things.

What two things is your focus being split between now?

Also, did you not know the time of the parenting class? I am confused.

There were different class times to sign up for but I didn't realize how it worked until it was too late; I assumed my attorney would present me with options and make sure I took care of it.

My focus now is being split between family and work. I think that 50/50 custody would let me go all-in at work when I don't have the kids and be more present for them when I do, and I think it will be better for them than before divorce.

How quickly does everyone think this guy will remarry? He literally needs someone holding his hand at all times, telling him what to do. How on earth do you even have a job if you can’t think for yourself?!

A female books his work travel. Takes his phone calls when he is in the road. Vacuums his office. Makes his hotel bed. Cooks his food and washes his clothes.

That is how he does it.

In the process of divorcing a guy like this right now. I think he filed because my job ramped up and he was astonished that he would need to step up at home.

He hired a female attorney and I was like, yup, checks out, another woman paid to deal with his messes for him. He must be paying a fortune because she’s definitely composing my DH’s emails and texts for him, even dumb stuff like asking if I’ve seen his windshield scraper. And like OP, my DH sincerely believes that 50/50 is doable as long as I “understand his busy schedule”. Hahahaha. He’s already flubbed so much visitation time as it is and we don’t even have a parenting plan yet.

Is he sleeping with her?! It costs more to pay an attorney to compose an email than to buy multiple new scrapers.

No, not that I know of, but good call. He has a history of emotional entanglement with paid professionals and has an ongoing emotional affair with his therapist which I uncovered via email. All of them are paid surrogates for the love and approval his mommy never gave him. But that's another thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For someone mandated to take a parenting class whose first instinct is to blame his attorney, I'm going to guess it won't go well for you.

The best you can do is register right now, today, with a start date as soon as possible and show the court you are working in good faith to correct YOUR error.

You may also want to look at your tendency to overlook deadlines and shift blame. You may find other things that will help you improve yourself and your co-parenting abilities.

I've been really busy with travel and work and I really don't think it should be held against me if I'm the higher earning and primary provider for the family. DW has time to do it on time because she doesn't do anything.

You should explain this to the judge, just like that.

He should follow it up with the comment about how having children on weeknights is “easy” and that his ex should be happy not to be “burdened”’with having to do fun things with children on weekends.”

Divorcing PP above, and my ex has actually argued that I have it easier when I have the kids on school days vs. when he gets all-day fun weekend outings because "they're only home for an hour after sports before bedtime".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For someone mandated to take a parenting class whose first instinct is to blame his attorney, I'm going to guess it won't go well for you.

The best you can do is register right now, today, with a start date as soon as possible and show the court you are working in good faith to correct YOUR error.

You may also want to look at your tendency to overlook deadlines and shift blame. You may find other things that will help you improve yourself and your co-parenting abilities.

I've been really busy with travel and work and I really don't think it should be held against me if I'm the higher earning and primary provider for the family. DW has time to do it on time because she doesn't do anything.

Im sure no judge in this area has ever heard “I’m too busy and important to take parenting seriously” before!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are making excuses for why this parenting class wasn't a priority. You're a grown adult - you shouldn't need your mommy reminding you of when you need to be where.

I work for attorneys and just a couple weeks ago watched one leave a conference early to fly to Chicago in order to support his daughter running a marathon. When your kids are important to you, you prioritize them. You didn't prioritize your kids.

I think that working 60 hours a week to make money for my kids should be considered more important than a 4 hour class that I don't even need.

Thanks for clarifying why you’re getting a divorce

[Anonymous]

This has to be a troll because surely this man would just spontaneously combust from his own toxicity IRL?