How do you deal with the emotions of TTC?

[Anonymous]

My husband and I ended up going to a therapist together. It is VERY stressful on a marriage and, while he tried to be SO supportive, his constant, "Don't worry about things...don't stress....etc" was not helpful. I would get so frustrated that he wasn't hearing my fears and anxiety. It really helped us in terms of learning how to communicate about it.

I also found that speaking with others who had been through similar struggles was very helpful. It was like an instant "bond" whenever I met someone who had difficulty conceiving. Even my husband found this comforting. He had several friends who went through similar struggles with their wives.

Also, I second the poster who recommend not telling anyone. When/If we try for number two, I will just keep it between my husband and I until I have something specific to share.

Hang in there! It's a very tough road...and one you can't go alone. Find whatever supports you find comforting.

[Anonymous]

Resolve has support groups. It is really great to be able to talk to other women who are going through the same thing. You can look for a support group in your area at resolve.org

[Anonymous]

I'm in the opposite camp of don't tell anyone (although I didn't want details shared with my in-laws, that had more to do with the dynamics of that relationship). Once we started freely speaking about it, it seemed like EVERYONE was in the same boat as us. I ended up getting wonderful support and advice from a semi-distant cousin, a friend of my husband's from law school, countless others. There were finally people to even joke with about the whole process of getting your husband to stab you in the ass with a needle every night. Helped us to relax a great deal. And, the more I discussed frustrations with my husband, the more "in it together" I felt.

[Anonymous]

I don't know anyone in the same situation. In fact I have 7 girlfirends that either just gave birth or are just about to - even a couple who had sworn never to have kids!. I am truely happy for them but that lump still rises in my throat as i hug and congratulate them. I feel so bad that I cannot be 100% happy for them all because it is always tinged with my own unhappiness. Ah well.

[Anonymous]

To PP (01:11) - you are certainly not alone. Try one of the listservs that are directed at supporting women as they go through this. I also had a difficult time feeling happy for friends and family who had pregnancy come so easily.. on one level I was happy for them but it was difficult to get over my own feelings of sadness and disappointment. I wish the best of luck for you and hope everything works out soon!

[Anonymous]

I am sooooooooooooooooooo soooooooooooooooo sooooooooooooo Tired of all of it!!! I cant stand anymore thinking about it, preparing, checking, taking pills and....NOTHING!

3 years and half of trying on and off...stoping to just "relax", but deep down still trying... computer program to check fertility cycle, ovulation kits, preganancy tests, prenatal vitamins...UGH!


I never thought I would have these kind of problems.... always had my cycles pretty regular, always afraid of getting accidently pregnant during college years....

And now for the past 8 months or so I am in this vicious clomid cycle... start taking on 3rd day, take it for 5 days, have intercourse on days 10, 12, 14 and 16 as obligation, wait more two weeks and... nothing...Start all over again.


Sorry, just wanted to vent.