I feel like I can't handle another day of this

[Anonymous]

No suggestions, but I’m truly sorry OP.

We’re all in this together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As an introvert, I am loving this. This is great. Hope it lasts forever.

F you. People are dying from the isolation.

- an introvert who needs people

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As an introvert, I am loving this. This is great. Hope it lasts forever.

F you. People are dying from the isolation.

- an introvert who needs people

+1000. I am an introvert myself and am missing my friends and extended family terribly. Other introverts I know are not loving this in the least. This is NOT the time and place for this. People are suffering greatly. Do us all a favor. Please don't come out and interact with people when this eventually ends. Nobody wants to be around nasty, selfish people like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry, OP. My dearest friend is in a similar situation, with her MD husband on a COVID unit, coming home at night where he has to retreat to their basement. This is an extended trauma for those on the frontlines and a huge sacrifice for them and their families.

Is there anything that would help make it feel better or relieve some pressure? I would hope to help ease the burden on frontline workers and their families—and I’m sure others would too.

OP here. What would honestly help is if my friends called/emailed/texted to check in on us and see how we're doing, that would make me feel less alone. Only one is really doing that.

It would also help if my husband wasn't so grumpy/exhausted all the time. I have no quality time with my husband since this all started. We haven't had a conversation to ourselves in 6 weeks. We haven't sat and watched a movie together in 6 weeks. He lives in the master bedroom now.

When we do see him, he makes me feel like being with us is an imposition. We don't see him on the weekdays because he says he needs to go to sleep at 8 pm and he goes into work before we wake up. The weekends are not fun family time. He spends some time with the kids but isn't happy about it. He wants that time to himself to recharge from the week.

[Anonymous]

First off OP you are right this whole situation just plain sucks and you are at the heart of the worst of it.
My first reaction was like another pp that suggested you take the kids and go to Arizona. That might help you and the kids and the grandparents. BUT that leaves your DH alone at his hardest time. Before you even consider this option have a conversation with him. On one side you leaving means he has to do some basic things to take care of the house and things like food shopping which is more work for him. On the other hand having you gone might actually be a stress relief for him because he wouldn't have to be worried about getting you and the kids sick. He would also have full access to the house and could just rest without feeling guilty that he isn't playing with the kids. It some ways you leaving might be good for him too.

If you stay you need to make a plan. I have a kid that does best when scheduled to the max which it sounds like you and the kids do to. So make a schedule. It will be totally different than life before but any schedule is a step in the right direction. Write it down and post it so your 7yr old can see it. Have them help you plan it out. On this schedule you list everything. meals and meal prep, bath time, exercise time (music dance party??) art/craft time, baking time, quiet/rest time, TV/movie time. If you plan it out your 7 year old might be better with the 1 hour of school work when they can see what a small part of the day it is. This is the time when you make things crazy and silly for you and the kids. Things like bubble bath time in the middle of the day or adding food coloring to the pasta so it is a funny color. You should also schedule calls with the grandparents if possible and maybe a call with a friend for each of you. Having a schedule written down breaks up the day into smaller more manageable chuncks of time.

You and the kids need fresh air and exercise. Even if that is just sitting outside and blowing bubbles or putting some music on and daning in your pjs. My kids had a blast doing the alphabet hunt. They have to find items in the house that start with each letter of the alphabet.

You can do this. One day at a time, one hour at a time.

[Anonymous]

Hang in there! It will get better

[Anonymous]

Stop the homeschooling if it is stressful. My husband has been working 14 hours days too and it's rough, though it's not medical so he isn't quarantined. I have created a new ritual where I take a hot bath with a book every night after our kid goes to bed. It helps a bit. Walks really help too. We go for a longish drive to pick up takeout once a week.

[Anonymous]

OP be good to yourself. You keep mentioning months and years, but you need to take this one day at a time. Staying in the present will help you to stop catastrophizing. You can stop homeschooling and cleaning. You can do simple meals. You can Zoom friends or do sidewalk chalk outside with kids. Just check in with yourself and ask "what do I need now?" and go from there. Focusing on gratitude, even about the very small stuff, might help too. (hugs)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As an introvert, I am loving this. This is great. Hope it lasts forever.

No one's saying YOU have to go out again when this is over. If your job allows WFH, you can stay in as long as you like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As an introvert, I am loving this. This is great. Hope it lasts forever.

That was a really unkind response at a time when we all need kindness. I’m an introvert too but I hate this. So many people are just hanging on right now.

[Anonymous]

Hang in there, OP. The main problem is stress so it should be addressed. Try meditating several times a day for 5 minutes, breathing exercises, maybe get some anxiety meds.

It sucks to solo parent 2 little kids, being laid off and husband working on front lines. Don't worry about the quality of parenting, focus on yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry, OP. My dearest friend is in a similar situation, with her MD husband on a COVID unit, coming home at night where he has to retreat to their basement. This is an extended trauma for those on the frontlines and a huge sacrifice for them and their families.

Is there anything that would help make it feel better or relieve some pressure? I would hope to help ease the burden on frontline workers and their families—and I’m sure others would too.

OP here. What would honestly help is if my friends called/emailed/texted to check in on us and see how we're doing, that would make me feel less alone. Only one is really doing that.

It would also help if my husband wasn't so grumpy/exhausted all the time. I have no quality time with my husband since this all started. We haven't had a conversation to ourselves in 6 weeks. We haven't sat and watched a movie together in 6 weeks. He lives in the master bedroom now.

When we do see him, he makes me feel like being with us is an imposition. We don't see him on the weekdays because he says he needs to go to sleep at 8 pm and he goes into work before we wake up. The weekends are not fun family time. He spends some time with the kids but isn't happy about it. He wants that time to himself to recharge from the week.

PP here. You have to be the one to call your friends. You have to be the one that YOU rely on. Have some compassion for your husband right now. I can't imagine how difficult is for him, especially when he is used to being the rock for your family. Maybe if you step up to be the rock in this situation, he will appreciate it and be less grumpy. All relationships (with family and friends) are give and take.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As an introvert, I am loving this. This is great. Hope it lasts forever.

\

Why would you post this here? There's nothing wrong with feeling the way you feel, but its extremely unkind as a response to OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Puttering around the house, doing yard work, cooking, cleaning, organizing, etc. just feels like the most boring waste of time. I've never been a homebody type--always been much happier being out and about. The social isolation is really getting to me. I loved getting together with friends for lunch, it was one of the highlights of my week in the past. So sad to think it could be months/years before I can do that again.

Not to mention my spouse is exhausted, stressed and distant and never home so I feel more alone in the world than ever.

Additionally, we had so many wonderful things planned this spring and summer--travel we have now canceled, special events that were one-time things (like my husband's 40th birthday celebration in April that we canceled--I had planned a big party for him, and my mother's 70th birthday celebration that we were going to fly to Arizona for in May--now canceled). We had a big family reunion planned for June--now canceled. We canceled all our travel through the end of 2020.

These are milestone events that we had to cancel and I'll never get those experiences back. Our families are all out of town (thousands of miles away, not within driving distance) and I have no idea when we will get to see them again. All this greatly depresses me.

None of those things need to be cancelled, just postponed. You can have your mom's 70th birthday celebration when she's 71; it's not the end of the world.

Think of your life and your life experiences as being on hold, not over. It's just a pause; it's not permanent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As an introvert, I am loving this. This is great. Hope it lasts forever.

F you. People are dying from the isolation.

- an introvert who needs people[/quote]

What an oxymoron statement!