What if you love a name but hate the possible nickname others will use for that name?

[Anonymous]

I had a similar problem. I loved a name for DD, but there is an alternate pronunciation that I absolutely can't stand. I ended up naming her that, and I politely correct people constantly. They are generally pretty good about remembering. I know people with the nickname problem that have had to correct people their whole lives.

I don't know what to recommend. It is annoying (especially given how much I hate the alternative name). But her name fits her so much, and I've always love it, so I deal. I think it really comes down to how in love with the name you are and how uncomfortable you'd be correcting others. If it's something like Thomas or Nicholas, you will almost certainly have to correct people using Tom or Nick multiple times.

[Anonymous]

my parents thought they had found a nickname proof name,

Then my grandma shows up at the hospital ans immediately shortened it.

They were so upset.

Years later, I used that name with my best friend in my neighborhood only. My mom said it was like nails on a chalkboard.

[Anonymous]

I have a Catherine although I really dislike the name Katie. As far as I know, no one has called her Katie yet, but that may happen as she gets older.

There's only so much you can do, though. People can and will screw up any name. My first name is a pretty common middle name, yet 9 out of 10 times, people add extra letters to the end which changes it into an entirely different name! Almost as if they think my name is a nickname and in an effort to be formal, they change it to what they think is my full name - when in reality, they are two totally different names.

[Anonymous]

If I hated the nicknames, I struck the whole name off the list because you can't control what other people will nickname your kids. My mom hated it when people called me a nickname.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ha! Sometimes your kid has a mind of his own. I loved the first name, never used the nickname and it was no problem. But it turns out my 10 year old likes the nickname and encourages others to use it. So now he’s known by both and it’s not a big deal.

This! I'm a teacher and I've had students who ask to go by a nickname then when I meet their parents they use their full name. I hate this so I named my kids names that don't have nicknames.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ha! Sometimes your kid has a mind of his own. I loved the first name, never used the nickname and it was no problem. But it turns out my 10 year old likes the nickname and encourages others to use it. So now he’s known by both and it’s not a big deal.

This! I'm a teacher and I've had students who ask to go by a nickname then when I meet their parents they use their full name. I hate this so I named my kids names that don't have nicknames.

Not sure why kids having their own opinion on their name bothers you so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've generally found that people usually only use a nickname if it's used first by the person in question. We have a Katherine who goes only by Kate and has never, ever been called Katie by anyone, even when she was a toddler. My college roommate was only ever Elizabeth, never Liz or Beth. I work with someone who is only ever Jonathon, not Jon. It's just how they introduce themselves so that's how they're called.

My best friend is a Kate and this has not been her experience at all. She has spent the last 40 years trying to stop people calling her Katie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ha! Sometimes your kid has a mind of his own. I loved the first name, never used the nickname and it was no problem. But it turns out my 10 year old likes the nickname and encourages others to use it. So now he’s known by both and it’s not a big deal.

This! I'm a teacher and I've had students who ask to go by a nickname then when I meet their parents they use their full name. I hate this so I named my kids names that don't have nicknames.

Not sure why kids having their own opinion on their name bothers you so much.

I don’t think that’s what she means. Sounds like th confusion is just a pet peeve and she wanted to avoid that with her own kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a Catherine although I really dislike the name Katie. As far as I know, no one has called her Katie yet, but that may happen as she gets older.

There's only so much you can do, though. People can and will screw up any name. My first name is a pretty common middle name, yet 9 out of 10 times, people add extra letters to the end which changes it into an entirely different name! Almost as if they think my name is a nickname and in an effort to be formal, they change it to what they think is my full name - when in reality, they are two totally different names.

This happens to me. I go by a nickname for one name but people lengthen it to a different name entirely.

[Anonymous]

The only people who do this to me are Australians.

"Hi, I'm Elizabeth"
"Liz-ooooooo!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:my parents thought they had found a nickname proof name,

Then my grandma shows up at the hospital ans immediately shortened it.

They were so upset.

Years later, I used that name with my best friend in my neighborhood only. My mom said it was like nails on a chalkboard.

What was the name??

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't do this if the nickname is an obvious, common nickname, like Liz for Elizabeth, Tom for Thomas, Katie for Katherine, etc. People will definitely use it no matter what you want, and your kid might even decide to use it as a form of rebellion if they're cunning like that.

OTOH there is a plausible nickname for my son's name that I don't like, but we decided to go for it anyway because the name itself is not common and neither is the nickname. Think something like the name Hickory and the nickname Hick (that is not actually it).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t use the name. You and your child will forever be correcting people. Unless they like the nickname and decide to go for it.

Signed - Elizabeth, not Liz, who is constantly and forever being called Liz.

Huh. I'm Elizabeth, and I go by Beth, and have been called Liz like once in my life. I just introduce myself as Beth and that's that.

Very strange.

[Anonymous]

Y'all are sooo uptight.

If you don't think you can handle it, then don't do it. People will attempt a nickname.

[Anonymous]

My son is named James. We use the nickname JP. People very often will call him Jim or Jimmy, which we do not use or like. By using the nickname often, or correcting people nicely, they will eventually get it. But yes, it is a little frustrating when assumptions are made.

- Elizabeth (nn Betsy but always called Liz by strangers)