College and Meeting Your Future Spouse

[Anonymous]

You didn't specify, but I'm assuming your child is a daughter. Would your husband put this must research into a school for your son to find a wife? I would feel awful for my daughter if my husband was like this. He may not realize it, but he is really trivializing the importance of her education.

I didn't meet DH in college.

[Anonymous]

How many all women/all men schools are there?

[Anonymous]

I met DH in high school. My BIL met his wife in college, and my sister met her husband while she was a student (he was friends with her roommate but wasn't in school himself). I think it's a good idea to think about meeting a spouse when you are college age. Many of my friends waited and some are still single in their 40s or married but dating got more stressful in their 30s.

[Anonymous]

Your DH sounds like princeton mom, anyone remember her?

http://www.cnn.com/2014/03/13/living/princeton-mom-book-marry-smart-matrimony/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I chose a school with a 60:40 female to male ratio and after a visit I thought the student body was the ugliest I'd seen. Additionally, the majority of students were on the opposite side of the political spectrum and there was a high gay student population. Then I met my husband my sophomore year. He's great. Yours is crazy.

Gotta be Pepperdine, right?!

[Anonymous]

Didn't meet my DH until after grad school - so certainly not college. Out of of all my college friends - I know two who married from college. One is divorced. Yikes.

[Anonymous]

OMG

[Anonymous]

My husband and I met our final semester at school. I was finishing my BA, he was finishing his PhD. Birth control failed, we got married and had our first daughter within a year of graduation.

Most of my friends did not meet their spouses in college. The ones who did were the more religious ones who got married before graduating or right after.

Your DH sounds crazy and way over the top to be focusing on the future spouse aspect.

[Anonymous]

They graduate when they are only 22. So many years ahead of them. Why the rush to land this girl a husband?

[Anonymous]

OP seemed careful to avoid specifying whether she was talking about a daughter...or a son. If a son, dad is one crazy Tiger Dad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I met my DH in college and have many friends who did as well. I think your DH is a little nuts, though I don't love the idea of same sex schools. Part of college is learning to navigate romantic and social relationships. As long as your DC goes somewhere normal and not, like, an uber-evangelical school or something like that, the pool of potential significant others will be fine. The odds are that your DC won't meet his/her spouse in college anyway.

^ By the way, though we met at 18, we married at 28. I only know one couple who married before 27, and they were high school sweethearts. They married at 24.

So funny- same exact ages and circumstances for my husband and I.

I don't agree with your husbands opinion, OP. I'm more concerned about my kids going to a school that suits their unique needs. I also think about friends- the friends I made in college changed my life. I'd want my kid to go to a school that would be a good for socially.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP seemed careful to avoid specifying whether she was talking about a daughter...or a son. If a son, dad is one crazy Tiger Dad.

Son or daughter it is a little over the top thinking....

[Anonymous]

I have a DS going to college next year, and yes, I'm slightly biased towards 50/50 environments. (I'd also like him to attend a school that is diverse and reflects the population of the US.) While I didn't meet my spouse in college the people that I did meet influenced my life for years, even to this day.

As for DS (who has declared himself cis-gendered) he likes schools that have more females than males, which is most of them. While he is a great kid, at least so far, I'd much rather him not be in an environment where he is sought after as a straight male. And while people may skewer that comment, I definitely think it could happen at some of the school that we've seen in the past year.

So, while I'd never put it in the terms that OP's DH did, I do think that you lose something when colleges cease to reflect the make-up of the general population.

[Anonymous]

I met my DH in college and frequently think to myself that people should not marry their college sweethearts.

[Anonymous]

I went to Wellesley and married a guy from Boston College. We met at a bar. Especially if your kid goes to school in an area with a lot of colleges/college-aged kids (ie Boston, NY, Southern California, etc.)...it's not like going to a single gender school in any way precludes them from hanging out with the opposite sex. You do realize that, right? I graduated from Wellesley with plenty of opposite sex friends (plus my DH! We married at 28 and 27 tho)...